Posts Tagged "Spanking"
I hope that you’ve found our synopsis of Tedd Tripp’s book “Shepherding A Child’s Heart” both thought provoking and useful. There is certainly a lot of useful information to be gleaned from the book. The following is my “cheat sheet” of things covered in the book:
4 Reasons our culture has lost its way in terms of parenting
- Many people in our day and age have children but don’t really want them. Children are viewed as a liability in a culture that has increasingly convinced people that the paramount goal in life should be their own personal fulfillment.
- The idea of quality time has replaced the idea of quantity time.
- It is no longer socially acceptable for Dad to be the authority in the home.
- Children see their parents refusing to submit to authority which results in their unwillingness to accept a submissive role in life.
7 Observations on Parental Authority
- You must not be embarrassed to be your child’s authority.
- Our authority as parents comes from being an agent of God.
- We should never direct our children for our own convenience, but rather on behalf of God for their good.
- The purpose of our authority is not to hold our kids under our power.
- Our goal is to empower our children to be self-controlled individuals living under God’s authority.
- As parents, we must require obedience from our children because God’s word calls for obedience and the honoring of parents.
- Based on Mr. Tripp’s experience, children don’t generally resist authority when that authority is kind and selfless as described above.
5 Observations on Shepherding Our Children
- As a shepherd, our goal is to help our children understand themselves as a creation of God and their role as being made “for God.”
- The job of a parent is to lead children on the path of discovery.
- Our job is to shepherd our children’s thoughts to help them learn discernment and wisdom.
- We do this with open and honest communication.
- The Heart is the Focus of Shepherding (“Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.” [Proverbs 4:23])
In this installment of our synopsis of Tedd Tripp’s book “Shepherding A Child’s Heart,” we will look at Chapter 15 – Infancy to Childhood: Training Procedures.” In the early years, discipline is weighted towards the rod because young children generally do not give much weight to conversation. In this chapter, Mr. Tripp examines the details of spanking including several question raised about spanking.
The “When” of Spanking
Tripp summarizes, “When you have given a direction that has been heard and is within his capacity to understand, and he has not obeyed without challenge, without excuse or without delay, he needs a spanking. If you fail to spank, you fail to take God’s Word seriously.”
As parents, we must be consistent. We cannot ignore disobedience. Failure to be consistent results from parents taking the easy way out. It is far more difficult to consistently make decisions based on sound biblical guidance and what is best for our kids. Tripp also explains that we must not warn and we must not ask kids if they want to be spanked. If we do, we train them to wait for the warning before obeying.
Before Tripp ever gets into the meat of this chapter, he shares an observation that I found very profound, “All earthly punishment presupposes the great day when destinies are eternally fixed.” I had never really thought about parenting in that light before.
Tripp begins the discussion of “The Rod” with a look at the current societal view of it. Of course, he touches on the fact that the rod, as discipline, is no longer a fashionable idea, and many people in today’s society view this biblical form of punishment as child abuse. Tripp observes, “I fear the majority reaction against spanking is a matter of fashion or style. The world of ideas is continually in flux. Ideas have their periods of popularity and unpopularity.”
Tripp looks first at the “Rationale Behind the Rod.” As he explains, if children were born morally neutral, there would be no need for the rod. They would not need correction, only direction. They would need instruction rather than discipline. The fact of the matter though is that kids are not born morally neutral. In Tripp’s words, “The child’s problem is not an information deficit. His problem in that he is a sinner.”Read More