1. Pray

Working in children’s ministry, I find myself praying “God, give me the strength!” more often than I would like to admit.  When you’re feeling down or just not into it though, it is essential that you turn first to God.  He renews us day by day, and he can renew us minute by minute.  Always start by asking your Heavenly Father.

2. Remember why you’re there

It’s not about you.  It’s not even about the kids.  It’s about God.  Remember that, in your ministry, you are there to serve a God who died on the cross for your sins.  If he can endure that for me, I can make it through a couple of hours of games, or a lesson on Sunday morning, or whatever the situation might be.

3. Plan Accordingly

When I’m not 100% sold out, there are still things I can do that will accomplish the purpose of my ministry.  For example, when I am picking games for Wednesday night, if I am feeling a bit out of it, I try to pick a game where the kids will have fun and there’s not a whole lot of my energy required.  On Wednesday night, we ran relay races of varying sorts.  My job was to explain the rules and say “On your mark, get set, go.”  There wasn’t a lot of “Ra! Ra!” required from me, which was good because I didn’t have a lot to give.  You can do the same thing when you are teaching.  Just gear your activities to work as much as possible.  This is not, by the way, a reason to slack off.  If you’re feeling down one Sunday, don’t throw in a video just because, but if a video actually works in the context of what you are teaching, go ahead and use it.

4. Strive for Excellence

My friend, Jared Massey, is fond of this term, and I agree with him wholeheartedly.  Even when you’re not feeling it, make it your goal to honor God by striving for excellence in all that you do.  Sometimes, this focus alone will be enough to pull you out of whatever funk you’re in.

5. Remember How you Feel, and Check Yourself

If you are tired or grumpy, it is easy to let that seep into your interactions with the kids in your ministry.  It is important to remember going in that you don’t quite feel yourself and try to keep your reactions in check.  If you are irritable, minor annoyances that wouldn’t bother you on a normal day are going to make your skin crawl.  Make sure that your reactions don’t differ just because you feel differently.

6. Fake it Until you Feel it

I probably shouldn’t say this, but the truth is sometimes you have to fake it.  You have to smile when you don’t feel like smiling.  You have to seem excited when you feel anything but.  But, rest assured that God is in control, and if you are seeking his will, he will provide you the sustenance to get through – so fake it!  The feelings are likely to follow.

Related posts:

1. 30 Ways to Get Connected with Your Kids
2. 22 Ways to Teach Kids HOW to Think And Not Just WHAT to Think

• Six Yancy Worship Videos
• Five Uncle Charlie Worship Videos
• From PreTeenMinistry.net – Curriculum, Small Group Series, Summer Game Pack, Coaching Series, Walk the Line and 21 PowerPoint games for preteens
• Five OneTimeBlind Illustration/Skit Videos
• Video Shorts & Countdowns from Timbuktoons
• 2 Tickets to the PreTeenMinistry Conference
• Children’s & Youth Logo Pack from Church Logo Gallery
• PowerPoint Games for Children, Students, and Adults and Children’s & Student Leader Training mp3′s from Burnt Toast
• 25 Best Youth Group Skits and 10 Best Youth Group Games from Righteous Insanity
• Bedroom Bible College for Tweens: Leader Guide PDF files from J12
• Journey: Beginning Your Walk with God

More details are available at www.only144.com. There are also great incentives to order early:

• The first person who orders will win a new Amazon Kindle.
• The first 10 people who order will win GoFish’s new Praise VBS Curriculum
• The first 20 people who order will win the book Stretch by Jim Wideman
• The first 50 people who order will win a MissionSix CD
• The first 100 people who order will win an iShine Live DVD
• The first 200 people who order will win a Yancy CD

So, make plans for noon on Friday to get your deal. And, remember if you miss it at noon that you only have another 144 hours until this deal is done! Happy shopping! Happy savings!

Disclaimer: The people at Only144.com have provided me with a complimentary copy of this wonderful package.

Related posts:

1. What is the big deal with contentment?

NAME

Tina Houser

WEBSITE

http://tinahouser.net/

http://tinapoint.blogspot.com/

TWITTER

@TinaHouser

MY FIVE FAVORITE “RECENT” ARTICLES FROM TINA

• Understanding Change

• The Rocks Cry Out

• A Flattened B-17

• Praise at the Top of Your Lungs

• Praying for the Presence of God

MY PERSONAL OBSERVATIONS

I’ve only met Tina in person once, and then only for a very brief encounter.  I could tell from that meeting though that she was full of life and passionate about reaching kids for Christ.  I have dealt with her by e-mail on several occasions for K! Magazine, and I have been consistently impressed with how friendly and approachable she is.  Tina’s work in putting together K! Magazine every month is a blessing to the Kidmin community.  She also writes The Kitchen Curriculum which includes all kinds of great stuff.  Some of the creativity included there prompted my question for her.

IN HIS OWN WORDS

I asked Tina to answer the following question in “just a few sentences”:

What is the most creative thing you have ever done to teach children about Christ?

Here is how Tina answered that question:

My answer might not sound extremely creative, because you probably think I’m going to say that I did a crazy science experiment where I foamed over the church baptistry … or carved a pumpkin to look like the Israelites walking through the Red Sea … or created a game using toilet plungers and flyswatters. Yep, those sound like loads of fun and I could definitely find a way to connect them with some spiritual truth, but that’s not what comes to mind first.

Intentionality. That’s probably the most creative thing I’ve done. Think about it. We teach kids a Bible story, connect them to the application, lead them to pray, help them memorize scripture, worship, and encourage them to serve others … and we do it all in one hour. None of those elements gets very much time. But, we know that when we focus on something for a longer amount of time, there’s more likelihood that it will sink in and stay. Because of that, I experimented with 6-week intentional programming where we concentrated on one area. I guess you could say it was creative, because no one was doing anything like it.

One such program was around scripture memorization and the participants committed themselves to a 90-minute session every week for 6 weeks. The kids chose a passage of scripture they wanted to memorize. I’m not talking a verse or two, but more like 12 verses and many times it was a full chapter! I presented them with a menu of scripture memorization techniques. And, they explored their passage through word studies, art, music, games, and building relationships with others. They lived with one specific passage for 6 weeks.  At the end of the time they had an opportunity to share it in a worship service if they so chose. Years later, those kids can still recite those full passages, because we approached memorization very intentionally.

Another program that I developed around intentionality was "Unwrapping the Servant" where all we dealt with was servanthood. For this 6-week program, the kids committed to 2 1/2 hours every Saturday so we could learn about serving others. (A little aside … out of all the years I did this, only once did a child miss and that was for his 6th grade science trip to Huntsville.) The kids themselves designed, planned, and carried out a way to serve in each of 4 areas: family, church, community, and world. Kids don’t recognize the needs around them, so the first order of business for the 6 weeks was to open their eyes to the people they encounter every day who need help. Sometimes it’s not possible, but in every case that we could, the kids actually met the people they were serving in order to put a real live face to what they were doing. I conducted a pre-test of 10 questions before starting the first day. Then, at the end I did a post-test of the same 10 questions. The answers were very revealing. The mindset change was remarkable! As these kids have grown up, they continue to willingly serve others unlike other Christian kids their age, and I truly believe it’s because we took time to intentionally teach them how God wants us to serve others.

That’s it. Intentionality. (Now, I think I’ll go put some yeast in hydrogen peroxide and see what happens.)

Related posts:

1. Children’s Ministry People You Should Know – Amy Fenton Lee
2. Children’s Ministry People You Should Know – Tony Kummer
3. Children’s Ministry People You Should Know – Jim Wideman

NAME

Jim Wideman (aka Brother Jim)

WEBSITE

Jim Wideman Ministries

Leader2Leader Blog

TWITTER

@JimWideman

FACEBOOK

Jim Wideman

MY FIVE FAVORITE “RECENT” ARTICLES FROM JIM

• Recruiting Like Jesus Recruited (Don’t miss Part 2 or Part 3 either)

• Moving Your Ministry From Good To Remarkable (Here are Parts 2, 3, 4 and 5)

• Delegate or Die: Developing Volunteers Through Ministry (The first installment is great, but you’ll also want to check out Part 2, Part 3 and Part 4)

• A Leader Is A Learner (Here are Part 2 and Part 3 so you can learn even more from Jim)

• Identifying Your Next Level

MY PERSONAL OBSERVATIONS

Jim Wideman is one of my favorite people in children’s ministry.  From what I do know, I think if I knew him a little better he would be one of my favorite people period.  Jim is the granddaddy (now both figuratively and literally) of children’s ministry.  Jim has been doing children ministry for a long time now, and one of the things I admire most about him is that he is willing to share all of that accumulated knowledge with the rest of us.  Whether it is through his numerous conference appearances, his infuse program or The Club, Jim is always seeking to share the knowledge and experience that God has given him. 

Before I ever met Jim in person, I had read most of his books and learned a ton.  I had such a great deal of respect and admiration for him that, to be honest, I was a little bit intimidated about meeting him.  He put me at ease in about 3 seconds.  When you sit down and talk to Jim, it’s like sitting down with an old friend whether you’ve met him before or not.  He just has that type of personality!

On a personal note, I have spoken before about how much I have learned from Brother Jim when it comes to children’s ministry.  Despite all of that, I think what I appreciate learning the most from him is about being a parent.    His book, Connect With Your Kids was helpful to me as a father who is also engaged in ministry.  Likewise, his chapter in the Collaborate book called “The Missing Piece – Developing a Biblical World View In Your Children” changes certain aspects of how I raise my kids.  For that alone, in addition to everything else, I am eternally grateful to Jim.

IN HIS OWN WORDS

I asked Jim to answer the following question in “just a few sentences”:

You’re the "go to guy" in the world of children’s ministry when it comes to questions and advice.  Between The Club, Infuse, conference appearances, books, etc.  I know that you get a lot of questions.  What is the most profound question someone has ever asked you about ministering to children? How did you answer?

Here is how Jim answered that question:

Just last week at the Group Kidmin Conference I was asked:

What the one thing that you need to get right to not trip you up for the long haul?

I said "Keep your love for God’s Word first and foremost. We must demonstrate a love for the Word as well and place a love for the Word in our own children and those we minister to. It’s not enough to teach it we must love the Word to the place it controls our every thought and action!"

Related posts:

1. Children’s Ministry People You Should Know – Amy Fenton Lee
2. Children’s Ministry People You Should Know – Tony Kummer
3. Children’s Ministry People You Should Know – Tina Houser

1. I am not anti-Facebook.  I believe Facebook, and other social networks can be a useful tool.
2. I have been on Facebook and Twitter for several years and find both very useful.
3. I do believe there is a danger in social networking just like any other circumstance you can put yourself in.
4. I believe that Facebook allows you to put yourself in danger more easily than in the past because it’s ready availability and the fact that you can use it in the comfort of your own home.
5. Whether the number marriages destroyed, at least in part, is 20%, 10%, 5% or 2% does not matter.  What matters is your personal circumstance.
6. I do not believe that, in all cases, Facebook is the sole contributing factor to the demise of these marriages, but it can serve as the proverbial “straw that broke the camel’s back.”
7. I believe that there are marriages that might otherwise have survived which are destroyed by relationships of opportunity that were formed on Facebook.
8. My concern is for marriages (and ultimately for protecting the kids that so often suffer when those marriage break up).
9. My purpose in writing is not to condemn you, but to warn you.
10. I believe that marriage is a covenant between and man and a woman and God, and it is a covenant that must be carefully guarded and protected from external and internal forces which seek to destroy it.
11. For those marriages where children are involved, the risks are even greater because the result affects additional people.
12. I believe that all marriages are salvageable, no matter how desperate they might seem, because I believe that our God can do anything.

So, the question we want to ask today – the question you need to address head on, is:

Who are you talking to on Facebook that you shouldn’t be?

Along with that question, you should ask, How open are you about your facebook account?  Does your spouse know everything you do online?  How would they react if they did know?

It would seem that the safety of sitting behind a keyboard and a computer monitor emboldens people to do things that they likely wouldn’t otherwise.  The fact of the matter is, if you are talking to someone on Facebook that you shouldn’t be, you probably know it, and you may very well have had to work hard to convince yourself that there is nothing wrong with what you are doing.  If you find yourself thinking,

“It’s just talking,”

or

“At least we’re not meeting in person,”

you may be heading down the track on a train you have no business on that will eventually crash and lead to the destruction of your family.

Dr. Steve Kimmons, of Loyola University Medical Center, explains one version of the process:

One spouse connects online with someone they knew from high school. The person is emotionally available and they start communicating through Facebook. Within a short amount of time, the sharing of personal stories can lead to a deepened sense of intimacy, which in turn can point the couple in the direction of physical contact.

The fact of the matter is, most people who go down this road don’t set out on a journey towards sin or unfaithfulness.  Dr. Kimmons goes on to explain:

I don’t think these people typically set out to have affairs. A lot of it is curiosity. They see an old friend or someone they dated and decide to say ‘hello’ and catch up on where that person is and how they’re doing.

Those initial contacts lead to deeper conversations and eventually to destruction. “It just happens” you might say.  The fact of the matter is, the way to keep it from happening is to not begin the journey in the first place.  Or, if you’re already on that journey, to end it immediately.

Here are some questions you should ask yourself to determine if you may have a problems that could lead to the destruction of your covenant marriage:

1. Am I talking to people online that I know I should not be or my spouse would be upset about?
2. Am I keeping any conversations/interactions that I have online secret from my spouse?
3. Do I delete chat conversations, posts or message to make sure my spouse doesn’t see them?
4. Am I talking to people online about problems in my marriage rather than addressing them with my spouse?
5. Am I sharing intimate details of my life with someone online?
6. Do I find myself defensive about this article or others who suggest I should not be talking to certain people?
7. Would I be offended or worried if my spouse logged into my account to see what I was doing?
8. Do I find a sense of fulfillment or happiness in Facebook that has been lacking in my marriage?
9. Do I use Facebook as a means of avoiding my spouse?

If you answered “Yes” to any of these questions, I would suggest that you reconsider you online activity and rededicate yourself to your marriage.  Here are some suggestions on how to do that:

1. Tell your spouse your passwords.
2. Invite your spouse to check out your account and don’t get upset if they take you up on it.
3. Talk to your spouse about your online activity.
4. If you “have to” send a message to someone your spouse might find objectional, copy your spouse on the message.
5. Unfriend people that you have no business being involved with.
6. Pray
7. Cancel your account if need be.

So, does all this seem like overkill?  It’s just Facebook after all?  Allow me to respond this way.  The entire time that I have been thinking about and writing this article, God has laid a particular song on my heart.  The song is “Slow Fade” by the group Casting Crowns.  The lyrics include the following verse:

The journey from your mind to your hands
Is shorter than you’re thinking
Be careful if you think you stand
You just might be sinking

“The journey from your mind into your hands is shorter than you’re thinking.”  It is something, and it must be dealt with with a sense of immediacy.  Right now, it may seem innocent enough, but left to fester and grow that innocent conversation can grow into something far from innocent.

“Be careful if you think you stand.  You might just be sinking.”  If you’re thinking, “none of this applies to me, I can control it,” then think again!  The future of your marriage, your family, your kids and your kids’ futures may very well depend on it.

Here is the rest of that song:

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QASREBVDsLk&ob=av3e

Related posts:

1. Moses is Departing Egypt: A Facebook Haggadah
2. Talking to Kids About Death
3. 100 Questions For Talking to Kids

NAME

Amy Fenton Lee

WEBSITE

The Inclusive Church

TWITTER

@AmyFentonLee

@SPNeedsKidmin

FACEBOOK

The Inclusive Church

MY FIVE FAVORITE “RECENT” ARTICLES FROM AMY

• Leading a Church’s Inclusion Initiative
• 5 Things to Know about the Mother of a Child with Autism
• Special Needs & The Future of Children’s Ministry
• Special Needs: Difference vs. Deficiency
• When Special Needs Ministry Becomes “Not My Problem”

MY PERSONAL OBSERVATIONS

Amy is one of those people that you could just sit and listen to for hours.  On a personal level, she is one of the nicest and most encouraging people I have ever had the privilege of meeting.  I have learned from her, been encouraged by her and have a great deal of respect for her as a children’s ministry leader and as a person.  She is a bit of a kindred spirit and good friend.  Her story of how she got involved in the world of special needs ministry is inspiring to me as it it similar to my involvement in DivorceMinistry4Kids.  However it came to be, her work with churches in the area of special needs ministries has been a blessing to the church as a whole and she has become a respected voice in the world of special needs ministry.  Perhaps the best thing I can say about her work is that I have nothing to do with special needs, yet I consistently learn from her work and her writing.  Whether she is leading the charge for inclusion of special needs kids in church, talking about her own experiences as a wife and mother or sharing what it was like to grow up as a pastor’s kid in a southern church, Amy is someone you definitely want to know.

IN HER OWN WORDS

I asked Amy to answer the following question in “just a few sentences”:

What steps should a church who does not have a separate special needs ministry take to be prepared for the time when children with special needs do come to their church?

Here is how Amy answered that question:

· Ask a single question on the registration form for every new guest or visitor:

“We want every participant in “Kidstown*” to have a safe and successful church experience. Equipping our volunteers to best serve your child is important to us. Does your child have any allergies, medical needs, learning differences, or physical challenges that it may be helpful for us to know about?

*Replace with name of your church’s children’s ministry

· Designate a person in your children’s ministry to chat with parents who answer “yes” to the above question. This ministry leader should have some familiarity with good questions to ask parents to determine what issues may require immediate attention versus a follow-up conversation (after church) for a longer term plan of accommodation.

· Prepare one or two adults or responsible teens to serve as impromptu buddies. Perhaps this is a volunteer who serves as a floater and is available to be pulled away on a moment’s notice. Many churches have a bonus volunteer who is prepared to serve as a one-on-one helper to a new student with special needs.

 

· Keep a few of the following items on hand to provide as aides to “impromptu buddies”:

• Sensory Toys
• Play-dough (Gluten-free play is a bonus!)
• Noise reduction earmuffs
• Dum-Dum Pops for a reward or distracter (this candy is nearly hypoallergenic)
• Goldfish
• A small, quiet area stocked with a few books, puzzles, and a CD player for music

Related posts:

1. Children’s Ministry People You Should Know – Tina Houser
2. Children’s Ministry People You Should Know – Jim Wideman
3. Children’s Ministry People You Should Know – Tony Kummer

NAME

Tony Kummer

WEBSITE

Ministry-to-Children.com

TWITTER

@TonyKummer

FACEBOOK

Ministry to Children

MY FIVE FAVORITE “RECENT” ARTICLES FROM TONY

• How will you make today matter?
• How to Raise a Fake Christian
• 5 Tips for Teaching Kids Using the Real Bible
• 3 Questions to Help Children Think about Vocation & Calling
• What Volunteers Really Learn When You Don’t Train Them

MY PERSONAL OBSERVATIONS

Tony was one of the very first people I interacted with online.  At the time, all I knew was that he ran this great site offering free children’s ministry resources.  Over the last few years, Tony and I have become friends and had the chance to meet in person a couple of times.  What I have come to find out is that Tony is one of the best at what he does, but also has a very humble and giving heart.  Tony’s unwavering commitment to his ministry, depth of thought and affection for his family make him a compelling human being and someone you should get to know.

IN HIS OWN WORDS

I asked Tony to answer the following question in “just a few sentences”:

What do you believe is the most important thing a children’s minister should do in their ministry?

Here’s how Tony answered that intentionally open ended question:

My first thought is to really love people and serve out of that motive.  That means making little choices to put relationships ahead of to-do lists.  It’s also the drive that keeps me serving and praying for these same people year-after-year.  I can’t say I do this well, but I’m trying…

Related posts:

1. Children’s Ministry People You Should Know – Amy Fenton Lee
2. Children’s Ministry People You Should Know – Jim Wideman
3. Children’s Ministry People You Should Know – Tina Houser

Lindsey Whitney

Send me your mailing information, and I will make sure the curriculum is sent out to you!

There is still time to enter to Win a Free Ticket to Orange Conference 2012.  That drawing will take place this Thursday.  There are three ways to enter, so make sure to take advantage of all three options!

Related posts:

1. And the Winner Is….
2. And the Winner of the Free Orange Ticket is…

Increase your chances to win!!! I’m trying to get the word out a new ministry – Divorce Ministry 4 Kids.  If you visit DivorceMinistry4Kids.com and subscribe to the newsletter there on the right hand side of the page between now and next Wednesday, we’ll enter your name one more time in the drawing.  You get a chance to go to a great conference, and a chance to learn about a great new ministry.  It’s Win-Win!

————————————————————————————————-

I’m sure it’s been on your calendar since last year, and the day had finally arrived.  Today is the day!  Registration for the 2012 Orange Conference officially opens today.  Here is some more information about this year’s conference:

• Dates: April 25-27, 2012
• Location: The Gwinnett Center in Duluth, GA (a suburb of Atlanta)
• Theme: Game Changers
• More than 80 distinct workshops
• Awesome lineup of speakers and breakout leaders
• Cost: More expensive the longer you wait to register!
• Networking: A must (how can you help but network with that many people in one place?)
• Much much more

Don’t miss your opportunity to attend this great conference.  I can tell you from personal experience that you will regret it if you do miss it.

Go to www.TheOrangeConference.com to find out more about the conference and register today!  I’m still trying to work out the details to make sure I can go myself this year, but if so I hope to see you there!

Here is the really exciting news!  The kind people of Orange have offered me one free ticket to give away to the reader of this blog.  Just leave a comment below and/or tweet the following:

@stocksohio is giving away a free ticket to the 2012 Orange Conference: http://wp.me/pN5Ju-1jB #kidmin

Do both, and we’ll enter you twice.  You can register anytime in the next week, and we’ll pick a winner next Thursday!

Related posts:

1. And the Winner of the Free Orange Ticket is…
2. It’s baaaccccckkkkk….and better than ever!
3. Why Do You Promote A Conference You Have Never Been To?

A Tool for Parents and Student Pastors to Understand and Lead Today’s Students

The world is changing, and so are today’s teens. Any parents who feels unequipped to raise a teenager in today’s world, and any student pastor who has ever felt overwhelmed with the alarming statistics, both know parenting and leading this generation can be challenging.

Both need help. Both need a plan. Both need each other. In this 13-week study, Chap Clark (Ph.d) articulates the problem with humor and fresh insight in a way you have never heard, and gives practical solutions that will change how you relate to this generation. Whether you work with teenagers or live with them, this DVD-based study will encourage you, challenge you and better equip you to raise healthy adults in today’s world-something that is not only possible, but within your reach.

I’ve raised a teenager, and made a lot of mistakes along the way, and I have three more teenagers in my future (God willing).  I picked this resource because, as a parent, I understand the challenges that raising a teenager brings, and I am hopeful that this resource will help.  My review will hopefully be coming soon, but in the meantime you can win a free copy of join me in exploring this resource.

HERE’S HOW TO WIN:

1. Leave a comment below explaining why you would like to win.
2. Post the following on Twitter: “@stocksohio has the secret to raising teenagers!  Not really, but I entered to win something that can: http://wp.me/pN5Ju-1jw #kidmin”

I’ll pick a winner sometime next Monday, September 26.  So, get your entries in before then!

Oh, and check out all the other Orange Week bloggers (many of them are doing giveaways as well:

• Matt McKee, http://mattmckee.me
• Jared Massey, http://www.smalltownkidmin.com
• Amy Fenton Lee, http://www.theinclusivechurch.com
• Wayne Stocks, http://waynestocks.com
• Cass Brannan, http://www.cassbrannan.wordpress.com
• Anthony Prince, http://www.westcoastcm.wordpress.com
• Michael Bayne, http://www.michaelbayne.net/
• Jenny Funderburke, http://jennyfunderburke.com
• Tom Pounder, http://www.ministryblackboard.com
• Henry Zonio, http://kidminandculture.com
• Nick Blevins, http://www.nickblevins.com
• Benjamin Kerns, http://www.averageyouthministry.com
• Amy Dolan, http://www.lemonlimekids.com
• Amanda White, http://www.impressyourkids.com
• DC Curry, http://www.currystew.org/
• JC Thompson, http://jcisonline.com
• Steve Cullum, http://www.stevecullum.com
• Ben Read, http://www.intentionalstudentministry.com
• Kenny Conley, http://www.childrensministryonline.com
• Sam Luce, http://samluce.com
• RyanMillard, http://www.ryanmillard.com
• Jonathan Cliff, http://www.jonathancliff.com

Related posts:

1. SPIRITUAL PARENTING DVD CURRICULUM (A Dad in the Middle Review)
2. Parenting By The Book
3. SPIRITUAL PARENTING by MICHELLE ANTHONY (A Dad in the Middle Review)

1. Because it’s worth it

Not to me, but it’s worth it to you.  This blog has always been about the readers, and I am comfortable that the Orange Conference is an experience that edify you in your work in children’s ministry.  In the end, that is what Dad in the Middle is all about.

2. The Line-Up

The line-up of speakers and breakouts at Orange is phenomenal year after year, and this year is no different.  Speakers will include:

• Reggie Joiner, founder of Orange
• Andy Stanley, Senior Pastor of North Point Community Church
• Craig Groeschel, Founding and Senior Pastor of LifeChurch.tv
• Lanny Donoho, President and Creative Director of BigStuf Productions and BigStuf Camps
• Jon Acuff, Author of Quitter, social media specialist at JonAcuff.com
• Mawi Asgedom, Educational innovator, author and founder of Mental Karate
• Sue Miller, Children’s innovator, author of Making Your Children’s Ministry the Best Hour of Every Kid’s Week
• Joel Manby, President of Herschend Entertainment, featured on Undercover Boss
• David Kinnaman, President of Barna Research Group and author of unChristian
• Carey Neuiwhof, Lead Pastor of Connexus Community Church
• Kara Powell, Executive Director at Fuller Institute and author of Sticky Faith and Deep Justice Journeys
• Stuart Hall, Director of Training for XP3
• Jared Herd, Creative Director of XP3 Students

Breakout leaders have not yet been announced, but if prior years are any indication, people I really admire, like and respect will likely be leading breakouts and pre-conference seminars.  People like:

• Jim Wideman
• Sam Luce
• Kenny Conley
• Jonathan Cliff
• Gina McClain
• Amy Fenton Lee

have all led such sessions in the past.

3. It’s About A Whole Lot More than just Breakouts

I haven’t been to Orange, but the conferences I have been to have taught me that the time spent networking and making connections can be more valuable than any time spent sitting listening to a speaker.  And, Orange is one of the premiere conferences for children’s ministry leaders to get together and spend some quality time networking, learning from one another and sharpening one another.

4. They Asked Me To

There are some great people associated with Orange who are interested in making sure that you have the best conference experience possible.  They asked me to let you know about registration beginning this Thursday, September 22nd, and given my high view of the conference anyhow, I figured why not.  To find out more about the conference, please visit www.TheOrangeConference.com.

Related posts:

1. Win a Free Ticket to Orange Conference 2012
2. The Children’s Ministry Telesummit (A Conference You Can Go to in Your Bathrobe)
3. Announcing the Official Unofficial CMX 2011 Pre-pre-conference Meet-up

This coming Thursday, September 22, 2011 is the first day to register for Orange Conference 2012.  The Conference will be help April 25-27, 2012 in Duluth, GA and will feature an awesome lineup of speakers and great breakout sessions.  As an added benefit (not really, but it sounds good), I am doing everything in my power to finally make it there this year!  It’s hard to tell this far in advance, but I’d put my odds at about 80-90% that I’ll be able to pull it off this year.  Much more to come throughout the week here about the Orange Conference, but this morning I just wanted to give you the heads up.

Plus, it’s good to see something other than just twitter updates on this site!  For more information on the conference, please visit TheOrangeConference.com!

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Last night was my first night serving in a ministry called Divorce Care 4 Kids.  If you haven’t noticed, I’ve been spending a lot of time recently on my newest ministry called Divorce Ministry 4 Kids.  As part of that, I found a local church offering the Divorce Care 4 Kids curriculum on Thursday nights and asked if they would let me serve in their program.  They were nice enough to allow it, and last night was our first of 13 weekly meetings.  The leaders of the group are great, and the other volunteers are nice enough, but there was, of course, a bit of awkwardness as everyone gets used to each other.

The night went well.  We had 12 kids, plus three more leader’s kids who have been through the program before.  That alone is a gift from God because as of Tuesday we thought we had seven kids coming.  Two of the first people to show up were sisters aged 11 and 9.  Mom hung out for a while, and it seemed pretty clear that they didn’t want to be there.  They weren’t causing any problems, but they were sticking to themselves and just had that “I don’t want to be here, and you can’t make me like it” air about them.

We went through class with some minor glitches that come with working out a new team and new ministry, but everything went fairly well.  I was reminded how much fun it is to just sit at a table with a bunch of kids you don’t know and get to know them.  After class was over, we had a little bit of time to hang out and chat before parents picked the kids up.  I noticed that the 11 year old was helping to clean up after some of the younger kids left their snacks so I walked over to thank her, at which point her nine year old sister was quick to point out that her older sister never cleans up at home.   We got to talking, and I learned a little bit more about their home lives and things they like and don’t like.  I didn’t really think much of it at the time.

When their mom came to pick them up, her first questions was, of course,

How was it?

I had moved on to something else, but I overhead the older child explain to her mother than “It was O.K., I like that guy over there.”  My heart, which had been breaking for all these kids all week and throughout the night, just melted.  The Mother asked if I was going to be there next week, so I explained that I would be there all 13 weeks.

So, why do I share this story? Am I tooting my own horn?  No, way!  I’m writing to toot God’s horn.  After a really long week, when I feeling really drained, God sent a child into my life who is, no doubt, hurting and confused.  In my misguided human thinking, I was under the impression that I was there to help her.  In the end, God worked through her to fill my spiritual tank, rejuvenate me and reignite a passion for serving God’s hurt children.  When we need encouragement and sustenance the most, God works through little lives and reminds us why we do what we do.  That moment made my week.  Thank you God!

Related posts:

1. How Many People Were On That Boat? (Children's Ministry Moment #5)
2. Dark Week Recap
3. Everybody Needs Jesus (Children's Ministry Moment #7)

The Cookbook will feature ideas, games, activities and lessons that you have used with your families to build Godly character at home.  These could include ways to memorize scripture (can your two year old recite the entire book of Ephesians?), ideas on worshipping as a family (maybe you’ve created a Partridge Family type worship band and tour with the kids?), family activities or outings (did you and the kids uncover the lost tomb of Lazarus?), ways you’ve tackled difficult theological questions (did you figure out a way to explain the trinity to a five year old), or anything else you’ve done to instill God and the Bible into your kids.  Seriously though, it doesn’t have to be earth shattering, if you have an idea that can help other parents, share it and let us learn from you.  The best entries, along with your name, will be published in the Seeds Family Worship Cookbook similar to a church cookbook.  If you have more than one idea, make sure you submit them all.

Remember, you only have until July 31 to get your entries in.  One thing that you can be certain of, everything that Seeds does is top notched in terms of quality and integrity.  Click on Seeds Family Worship Cookbook to submit your entry.  Oh, while there you should buy a CD or two – you won’t regret it!

Related posts:

1. 1 Timothy 4:12 (Seeds Family Worship)
2. Seeds Family Worship – A Review
3. PUT ON LOVE – Seeds Family Worship

This is a fun little video that depicts the story of creation.  I used it several months back with our Kindergarteners and First Graders, and it was a hit!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s2RA0DIJTAI

Related posts:

1. When God talks Creation Rocks
2. Why I Believe the Bible #03 (The Bible Is A Book of History)

The CMX preconference runs from 6:00 – 10:00 PM on July 6th.  So, we are going to get together from roughly 4:00 PM to 6:00 PM in the food court in the arena where CMX is being held.  So, if you’re coming in early, make plans to join us.  There is no invitation necessary, no agenda and nothing other than a chance to get together with other like-minded people, talk children’s ministry, make some new friends, reacquaint with old friends and just have a good time!  I know I’ll be there, and I hope you can make it too – the more the merrier!

If you’re coming and you can make the meet-up, leave a comment below to let us know.  If you’ll be at the expo, but not in time for the meet-up, let us know that too.  Leave a comment, and I will track you down during the conference.  I want to meet as many people as possible this year!

If you haven’t made up your mind, or haven’t heard about CMX, let me fill you in.

• CMX will be held July 7, 2001 from 8:00 AM to 8:00 PM in Lexington, Kentucky at The Lexington Center (adjacent to Rupp Arena).
• The cost for the entire conference is only……..$25.  That’s right – that’s no typo.  It’s only $25 dollars.  You and a team of 10 people can go to CMX for less than the cost of one ticket to most other children’s ministry conferences.
• CMX is the brainchild of Roger Fields and the remainder of the Kidz Blitz team.
• A CMX Pre-Conference will be held from 6:00 – 10:00 PM on July 6, 2011.  The pre-conference will include all of the exhibitors but no presentations.
• CMX includes over 75 exhibitors showing off products encompassing all of your children’s ministry needs.
• Exhibitors will be conducting a variety of 20 minute Scoops highlighting how their products can help you in your ministry.
• On Thursday, there will be “Sit-Ins” from some of the nations best known experts in children’s ministries.  These sit-ins are designed to help you take your ministry deeper and will be presented in three different Tracks.  There is a Leadership Track, A Children’s Ministry Basics Track and a Special Needs Track.
• Speakers will include Greg Baird, Dr. Alyssa Barnes, Tina Bryson, Michael Chanley, Jeremy Collins, Coach D, Ken Dovey, Amy Fenton Lee, Roger Fields, Jenny Funderburke, Katie Garvert, Dale Hudson, Tony Kummer, Jim Marshall, Gina McClain, Jolene Philo, Karen Rhodes, Michelle Romain, Justyn Smith, Jim Wideman and Yancy.
• This year will also include a special exhibition of a Kidz Blitz FX Live Experience at 11:00 AM on July 7th.
• Make sure to sign up for “Speed Networking” at the pre-conference on July 6th.  You can sign up here.

By the way, in case this article sounds like an advertisement, I am in no way associated with CMX or Kidz Blitz.  I am not an exhibitor or a speaker this year.  I am simply a big fan and someone who wants to make sure you do not miss out on this great opportunity!

There you have it.  Here’s what you need to do:

1. Make plans to be at CMX on July 7.
2. Show up for the pre-conference on July 6.
3. Join us at 4:00 PM on July 6 for the pre-pre-conference meet-up.
4. If you can’t make the meet-up, let me know so we can get together some other time!

By the way, I am also staying around after the conference, so if your schedule’s full and you want to get together on the 8th, just let me know.

I hope to see you there!

By the way, I borrowed the image for this post from the CMX website.  I hope they don’t mind.

Related posts:

1. Win a Free Ticket to Orange Conference 2012
2. Why Do You Promote A Conference You Have Never Been To?
3. The Children’s Ministry Telesummit (A Conference You Can Go to in Your Bathrobe)

1. I’ve been on “hiatus” for almost six months now which hasn’t kept me from writing the occasional aritcle; and
2. I’ve been writing a lot recently about Children of Divorce.

I won’t go into all the details, again, of my research into Children of Divorce but needless to say I have spent hours and hours online searching out articles and authoritative literature.  Last week, I decided I need to find a way to organize it and produce a bibliography.  I was lucky enough to find Zotero.  The Zotero website describes the program as:

…a free, easy-to-use tool to help youcollect, organize, cite, and share your research sources. It lives right where you do your work—in the web browser itself.

That’s right, Zotero integrates directly into Firefox.  You simply click a button and enter any information you want to keep track of related to citing the document and your set.  Zotero offers templates for all kinds of documents including:

• Audio Recording
• Blog Post
• Book
• Case
• Conference Paper
• Dictionary Entry
• Document
• E-mail
• Encyclopedia Article
• Forum Post
• Instant Message
• Interview
• Journal Articles
• Letter
• Manuscript
• Magazine Articles
• Newspaper Articles
• Patent
• Podcast
• Presentation
• Radio Broadcast
• Report
• Statute
• Thesis
• Video Recording
• Webpage
• And more….

You can generate a complete bibliography, cite individual resources (with the word processor plugin), keep a copy of pdf files or snapshots of webpages with the associated reference, sync your references so that you can use Zotero on multiple computers, create different libraries, and so much more.  I’ve only been using it for seven days now, but I’ve got over 300 articles indexed and streamlines my research process as I go forward.

Zotero is fully searchable and can also be used to keep track of web pages and notes you want for future reference.  I am just scratching the surface, but I think the possibilities are endless.

Zotero integrates seamlessly into Firefox.  There is also a stand alone version which works with Google Chrome or Safari.  A plug in for Internet Explorer is also in the works.  The Zotero homepage includes fairly comprehensive documentation and support forums.  All that is pretty amazing for a free resource!

No related posts.

The goal of this survey is to help those of us who work with children to recognize the needs of children of divorce and serve them better. If you fall within the group targeted by the survey, please click on the link above and take 5 minutes or so to help us to positively impact kids who are currently going through the divorce of their parents. If you know of someone who fits the criteria, please forward the link to them as well. The more people we can get to fill out the survey, the better the results will be.

God has laid this issue heavily on my heart. As such, it is my intention to publish this article on Ministry-to-Children, Kidmin1124 and Dad in the Middle at roughly the same time. I apologize to those of you who will stumble across it more than once because of that, but my desire is to reach the largest audience possible in hopes that some in that audience will help me to spread the word. Thank you so much for your help. Now, on to the article!

You might be surprised to find out that the divorce rate in the United States is actually decreasing and has been since it reached its high point in the early 1980s. Despite the relatively small decrease, it is still an epidemic. Recent studies show that the projected divorce rate for first marriages in this country is approximately 43%. For second marriages, that rate shoots up to 60%. Indeed, while the decrease in the rate of divorce is a good thing, it is driven primarily by an increase in cohabitation and failure to marry rather than a “real” decrease in divorce.

You might think, given the Biblical mandates on divorce, that divorce rates in the church would be much lower than those in the general population. Unfortunately, that is not true! According to a Barna study done in 2004:

Although many Christian churches attempt to dissuade congregants from getting a divorce, the research confirmed a finding identified by Barna a decade ago (and further confirmed through tracking studies conducted each year since): born again Christians have the same likelihood of divorce as do non-Christians.

There is no denying that as a society, we have become much more accepting of marriage. In a recent study by the Pew Research forum, they found that:

Asked to consider two views about divorce, a majority of the general public chooses “divorce is painful, but preferable to maintaining an unhappy marriage” over the view that “divorce should be avoided except in an extreme situation” (58% to 38%).

In a society that values the “happiness” and “rights” of the parents, what is often lost in the discussion is the devastating impact that divorce has on children. In her book Between Two Worlds: The Inner Lives of Children of Divorce, revealing the results of her groundbreaking study on the children of divorce, Elizabeth Marquardt cuts to the chase:

You will find only a few books on divorced families, at least in proportion to the number of divorced families in this country, and most of them are upbeat guides on how to divorce rather than in-depth looks at the lives of divorced children. Strangely, our culture seems only too happy to talk about dysfunctional intact families – to point fingers at all the ways married parents can mess up with their children – but it falls silent about divorce because no one wants to make divorced parents feel bad.

Consider that half of the children in America today will live through the divorce of their parents. Of that 50%, half of those children will see the dissolution of their parents’ second marriage as well. Since roughly 1972, over 1 million children each year have experienced the divorce of their parents. By 2008, 3 out of every 10 minor children were living in a single-parent home (note: this does not include children of divorce whose parents had remarried). Recent studies show that divorce rates in rural America are now just as high as those in suburban and urban America. The point is, there is no doubt that children of divorce are not only present but prevalent in your children’s ministries. It is our job to minister to these kids, and part of that process is understanding what they are going through.

It is time that we engaged in the conversation. The impact of divorce on children can no longer be ignored, and as those in children’s ministry who are called to minister to the needs of these children, it is time that we stepped up to the plate and did something about it. Consider the following additional finding from Ms. Marquardt’s study:

Of those grown children of divorce who were active in a church at the time of their parents’ divorce, two-thirds said that no one from the clergy or congregation reached out to them at that time.

As a church, we have largely failed these kids. That is not true of every local church, but it is true of many. We have turned a blind eye to the special needs of these children because we were unaware of the issue, unwilling to address it or afraid that somehow ministering to these children would be construed as condoning the act of divorce itself. It is high time that we got past these fears and insecurities and got about the business of ministering to God’s children. These kids are as important to God as any others. We serve a God who “binds up the brokenhearted.” It is time that we acted as his hands and feet to these kids who natural support systems (their families) have imploded at a time when they need them the most. It is time that the church stepped in, in whatever way that we can, to fill that void.

While each child is clearly unique, and each divorce is unique, there are some common emotions and reaction that many children of divorce share. A comprehensive list is beyond the scope of this article (and quite possibly impossible to compile), but here are some things that you as a children’s minister should be aware of in ministering to children of divorce:

• Children of divorce are always missing someone. Kids love their parents and generally don’t understand why they can’t get along. When they are with mom, they miss dad and vice versa. This will continue for their entire childhood, and likely beyond.
• Divorce shatters a child’s foundation. Everything they have believed in and everything that they have counted on shatters in an instant. They begin to question (throughout their childhood) all aspects of their lives.
• To a child, divorce is not a single event. It is a trigger that changes their lives forever and which they may never fully recover from.
• Children who spend time in different homes with two different families often report that they feel like two different people depending on where they are staying.
• The rituals that a child has become accustomed to are often shattered during a divorce. Children desire ritual, and they are likely to replace these lost rituals with unhealthy ones if healthy alternatives are not provided.
• Younger children are likely to regress in their behavior as their parents move through the divorce process.
• Divorce is something that children need to grieve. However, their grief does not move along a straight line. Instead, many children are likely to re-experience the grief of their parents’ divorce as they move through each developmental stage.
• Many children experience the loss of childhood going through a divorce as they are expected to take on many more adult responsibilities.
• Many children of divorce start to tackle deep spiritual questions earlier in life. They are faced with questions like, “Why did God let this happen to my family?” and “Why didn’t God answer my prayer for my parents to get back together?”
• Some of the common emotional responses of children of divorce include:
  • Anger
  • Aggressiveness
  • Anxiety
  • Confusion
  • Denial
  • Depression
  • Loss of Control
  • Resentment
  • Sadness
  • Guilt
  • Fear
  • Stress
• Children can manifest the feelings they have about the divorce in any number of ways. These include:
  • Acting out
  • Pretending everything is fine
  • Withdrawal
  • Complaining
  • Attitude and discipline problems
  • Self-destructive behaviors
  • Being clingy

There is much that we, as the church, need to do to minister to this oft-neglected mission field of Children of Divorce. This article is all about the first step – getting the conversation started!

If you are interested in additional resources, I have written several articles about this issue and done three radio shows specifically designed to get the conversation started. I encourage you to check out these additional resources:

• Kidmin Volunteer – Ministering to Kids of Divorce
• Kidmin Volunteer – Part 2 Ministering to Children of Divorce
• Kidmin Volunteer – Ministering to Children of Divorce 3
• Ministering to Children of Divorce
• Divorce and Kids – Read to Me
• Just the Facts – Exploring The Dark Side of Divorce
• Two Houses (The Pain of Children of Divorce)
• A Glimpse Into God’s View of Divorce

Additionally, we have created a group on CMConnect.org to further discuss ministering to children of divorce. Make sure to stop by and join Leading With Love. We are blessed to have some experts amongst those who monitor the forum for questions and discussions.

If your church is interested in doing something to help these kids, make sure you check out the Divorce Care for Kids (DC4K) curriculum. Also, make sure to check out the personal website of Linda Ranson Jacobs. That site is Hlp4. Linda was our guest on Kidmin Volunteer Radio to talk specifically about ministering to children of divorce. She is actually the author of the DC4K curriculum, and I am certain that she would be happy to talk to you more about it if your church is interested. You can contact her by using this form on her website.

Related posts:

1. Two Houses (The Pain of Children of Divorce)
2. A Glimpse Into God’s View of Divorce
3. Just the Facts – Exploring The Dark Side of Divorce

Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, and above all these put on love.

So, without further introduction, here is the world premiere of Put on Love:

Here’s the great news, our excitement can help you too.  Seeds has been kind enough to offer a free set of all six of their CDs:

• Seeds of Courage
• Seeds of Faith
• Seeds of Praise
• Seeds of Purpose
• The Power of Encouragement
• Seeds of Character

All you have to win is leave a comment below explaining why you like Seeds Family Worship or how you would use the CDs in your ministry.  I will close entries on the last day of the blog tour (May 31) and pick a random winner.  If you can’t wait, go the Seeds Family Worship Store and use the code CMCONNECT on checkout to receive 20% off your order of CDs.

Make sure to check out the remaining stops on the blog tour:

Related posts:

1. 1 Timothy 4:12 (Seeds Family Worship)
2. Seeds Family Worship Cookbook
3. Seeds Family Worship – A Review

• Young (1 Timothy 4:12)
• Do Not Be Anxious (Philippians 4:6-7)
• Cast Your Cares (Psalm 55:22)

I also wrote an extensive review of Seeds Family Worship for Ministry-to-Children.com last July called What’s the Deal with Seeds Family Worship?,

This week, I am excited to announce that Dad in the Middle gets to host the world premiere of a brand new Seeds Family Worship song from their 6th album titled Seeds of Character.  Beginning today over on Ministry-to-Children.com, the band will premier one new song roughly every day through the end of the month.  The complete schedule, along with links to the blogs participating is included below.

Here is the song list from the current album along with the scriptures they are based on:

1. MORE THAN CONQUERORS – (Romans 8:37)
2. THE WAGES & THE GIFT (Romans 3:23 & 6:23)
3. THE LIFE (John 14:6, I John 5:11-12)
4. THE FRUIT (Galatians 5:16 & 22)
5. DELIGHT (Psalm 1)
6. TEACH THEM (Deuteronomy 6:4-7)
7. THE PERFECT EXAMPLE (John 13:12-17)
8. CHILDREN & FATHERS (Ephesians 6:1-4)
9. PUT ON LOVE (Colossians 3:12 & 14a)
10. THE CHARACTER SONG (Romans 5:1-5)
11. GIVE THANKS (Psalm 105:1-5)
12. THE ONLY WAY (THE NEW TESTAMENT SONG) – BONUS TRACK

We will be premiering “Put On Love” based on Colossians 3:12 & 14a on Friday, May 20, 2010.  So, make sure to check back then for the premiere of that video.  Here is the rest of the schedule:

So, make sure to check out a new song each day, and go to Seeds Family Worship to purchase a copy for yourself.  The unique packaging of each Seeds Family Worship CD gives you one to keep and one to give away to a friend.

Related posts:

1. 1 Timothy 4:12 (Seeds Family Worship)
2. Seeds Family Worship – A Review
3. PUT ON LOVE – Seeds Family Worship