Related posts:

1. Psalm 55:22 (Seeds Family Worship)
2. Phillipians 4:6-7 (Seeds Family Worship)
3. When God talks Creation Rocks

What Is Faith?

• Faith is the substance of things asked for [Hebrews 11:1]
• Faith is the conviction of things unseen [Hebrews 11:1]
• Faith involves waiting for things to come [Hebrews 11:13]
• Faith is a shield [Ephesians 6:6]
• Faith is a breastplate [1 Thesalonians 5:8]
• Faith is most holy [Jude 1:20]

Where Does Faith Come From?

• Christ is the author of our faith [Hebrews 12:2]
• Christ is the perfecter of our faith [Hebrews 12:2]
• Faith is a gift of the Holy Spirt [1 Corinthians 12:9]
• Our faith is through Christ and equal to all saints [2 Peter 1:1]

How Do We Get Faith?

• Faith is a gift of God [Romans 12:3]
• Scripture is designed to give us faith [John 20:31, 2 Timothy 3:15]
• Preaching results in faith [Romans 10:14-15, Romans 10:17]

Why Should We Have Faith?

• Christ must be received by faith [Romans 3:25, Galatians 2:16, Phillipians 3:9]
• Faith brings peace with God [Romans 5:1]
• It is impossible to please God without faith [Hebrews 11:6]
• Faith is commanded by God [1 John 3:23, 1 Corinthians 16:13]
• As Christians, we live by faith [Galatians 2:20]
• Stewardship of the gospel is accomplished by faith [1 Timothy 1:4]
• Faith is necessary to accept the gospel [Hebrews 4:2]
• We are saved through faith [Ephesians 2:8]
• Faith leads to the forgiveness of sins [Acts 10:43, Romans 3:25]
• We are justified by faith [Romans 3:21-22, Romans 3:28-30, Romans 5:1, Galatians 2:16, Romans 4:16]
• Faith cleanses our hearts [Acts 15:9]
• Faith leads to sanctification [Acts 26:18]
• We are guarded by our faith [1 Peter 1:5]
• We are sons of God by faith [Galations 3:26]
• Faith gives us access to God [Romans 5:2, Ephesians 3:12]
• Faith leads to the inheretance of promised things [Hebrews 6:12]
• The Holy Spirit comes through faith [Galatians 3:14]
• We speak of God by faith [2 Corinthians 4:13]
• Faith allows Christ to dwell in our hearts [Ephesians 3:17]
• Faith is necessary in prayer [James 1:6, Mathew 21:22]
• Faith allows us to stand free of fear [Romans 11:20]
• Faith overcomes the world [1 John 5:4-5]
• Faith allows us to resist and overcome the devil [1 Peter 5:9, Ephesians 6:16]
• Faith grounds us [Colossians 1:23]

Who Should We Put Our Faith In?

• Our faith should be in the power of God [1 Corinthians 2:5]
• Jesus is to be the object of our faith [Romans 3:21-22, Romans 5:1, Galatians 2:16]

What is Our Role in Faith?

• We must build our faith [Jude 1:20]
• Faith is a fight [1 Timothy 6:12]
• Faith excludes boasting [Romans 3:27]
• Christians walk by faith rather than sight [2 Corinthians 4:12]
• Faith is something the Christian can excel in [2 Corinthians 8:7]
• We must continue in the faith [Acts 14:22, Colossians 1:23]
• Should pray for increasing faith [Luke 17:5]
• Faith must be contended for [Jude 1:3]

How Does Faith Relate to Love?

• Love comes from faith [1 Timothy 1:5]
• Faith works through love [Galatians 5:6]

What Is The Evidence of Faith?

• We should test ourselves to make sure we have faith [2 Corinthians 13:5]
• True faith is evidenced by its fruit [James 2:21-25]
• Faith without works is dead [James 2:17, James 2:26]

What is the Relationship Between Faith and Sin?

• Whatever is not from faith is sin [Romans 14:23]

What Kind of Faith Does God Want?

• God wants us to have a considered faith, not blind faith [1 Thessalonians 5:21]

Return to the I Believe… index page.

Related posts:

1. 25 NOT SO Random Things About Me
2. I believe…What I believe about sin
3. December 18 – Hark! The Herald Angels Sing (A Christmas Carol Advent)

Why Did God Make Us?

This question has been asked over and over throughout history.  In fact, King David asked essentially the same question in Psalm 8:

“When I look at your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is man that you are mindful of him, and the son of man that you care for him?”  [Psalms 8:3-4]

The fact of the matter is that the Bible does not give us explicit details about why God chose to make us as opposed to not making us.  Genesis 1:1 clearly tells us that God created the world, and Genesis 1:27 tells us that he created man (and woman) in his own image.  Beyond that, it does not talk much about the why of creation.  Accordingly, this question rightly falls under the umbrella of the “secret things” discussed in Deuteronomy 29:29:

“The secret things belong to the Lord our God, but the things that are revealed belong to us and to our children forever, that we may do all the words of this law.” [Deuteronomy 29:29]

Fortunately, the Bible does give some insight even if it doesn’t come right out and directly answer the question.  Let’s start with some of the mistaken theories that are often offered for why God created us.  Let’s look at some of those notions and see why they are not true.

Some people contend that God created man because he needed an object for his love.  Not true!  From infinity past, God has existed in the trinity in perfect communion with perfect love amongst the members of the trinity.  God loved us before he ever created us (Jeremiah 31:3), but he did not require man as an object of his love.

Some hold that God created man because he needed us.  Again, not true!  God needs nothing.  Indeed, there is nothing that we, as his creation, can offer to him.  Acts 17:24-25 explains:

“The God who made the world and everything in it, being Lord of heaven and earth, does not live in temples made by man, nor is he served by human hands, as though he needed anything, since he himself gives to all mankind life and breath and everything.”  [Acts 17:24-25]

God, in the trinity, never felt any loneliness.  God loves us, to be sure, but he does not need us either as a companion or as an object of his love.

Fortunately, the Bible does reveal some things about why God actually made the world and made us.  The short answer to the question “why did God make us” is that he made us for him.  Colossians 1:16 tell us:

“For by him all things were created, in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities–all things were created through him and for him.” [Colossians 1:16]

We were created for God’s pleasure.  So, what does that pleasure look like?  Revelation 4:11 gives us some insight in the worship of God in heaven:

“Worthy are you, our Lord and God, to receive glory and honor and power, for you created all things, and by your will they existed and were created.”  [Revelation 4:11]

Ultimately, God created us to give him glory.  We are commanded to live for the glory of God in 1 Corinthians 10:

“So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God. “ [1 Corinthians 10:31]

It is important to understand that we were not created to add to God’s glory (that would be impossible).  Rather, we were created to reveal God’s glory.  Given that we were created to bring God glory, it makes sense to ask the question “How do we bring God glory?”  There are several ways:

1. By loving the lord with all our heart, mind, soul and strength (Deuteronomy 6:5)
2. By loving our neighbor as ourselves (Matthew 22:39)
3. By sharing God’s gospel with unbelievers (Matthew 28:18-20; 2 Corinthians 5:18-20)
4. By doing the good works which God created us to do (Ephesians 2:10)
5. By serving faithfully in God’s army (Ephesians 6:10-18)
6. By worshipping God and giving him thanks (Psalm 50:23)

This is just a short list of the many ways we can glorify God.  In short, we are God’s light to the world, and everything we do should be done with the purpose of bringing him glory.

The best explanation I have heard which provides some insight into why God would choose to create us draws on the frequent analogy found in scripture between our relationship with our earthly parents and our relationship with God.  Imagine for a moment why a man and his wife might make the decision to have kids.  They anticipate the joy of having a child, they desire to replicate themselves and they desire a relationship with a child.   Although the Bible is not explicit, and the analogy is not perfect (for example a husband and wife may feel their family is incomplete without kids – God would never feel such incompleteness), but it does offer some insight into why God may have chosen to create us.  We were not created because God needed us, but we certainly need him and should desire to live our life in accordance with his will.

Return to the Questions Kids Ask index page.

Related posts:

1. Who Made God? (Questions Kids Ask)
2. #22 – Invite Questions From the Kids (Tips For Large Group Teaching)
3. #23 – The Power of Open-Ended Questions (Tips For Large Group Teaching)

1. Are you teachable?
2. How do you respond to correction and rebuke?
3. Do you repent quickly and thoroughly?
4. Are you considerate of other people?
5. Do you serve and receive service well?
6. Are you consistently aware of God’s grace in your life?
7. Do you disagree in an agreeable way?
8. How much attention and affirmation and affirmation do you require?

The whole sermon is definitely worth your time to check out.

You can find it right here! Also included at the site is a link to the sermon notes.

Related posts:

1. #23 – The Power of Open-Ended Questions (Tips For Large Group Teaching)
2. #22 – Invite Questions From the Kids (Tips For Large Group Teaching)
3. Why Did God Make Us? (Questions Kids Ask)

I am currently reading through the minor prophets in my daily Bible reading.  I noticed that the phrase “Day of the Lord” is a common theme in much of their writing, and I thought I would do a little study on the phrase to see if I could figure out what The Day of the Lord was really all about.  After each passage, I offer some conclusions about what the passage says about the Day of the Lord.

According to my ESV Study Bible, the earliest known usage of the phrase is in Amos 5:18-20:

“Is not the day of the LORD darkness, and not light, and gloom with no brightness in it?” [Amos 5:18-20]

Amos invokes the term in describing the judgment against the Northern Kingdom at the hands of the Assyrians.  Amos rebukes those who desire the coming day of the Lord and asks “Why would you want that?”  The ESV study Bible postulates that perhaps the term had come into popular use at that time to symbolize that time when God would return and make Israel the head of all nations.  Amos warns that the coming day of the Lord is not a time of safety (as having escaped from a lion) but terror (as being consumed by a bear). 

Conclusion: The Day of the Lord is nothing to look forward to because it brings with it the darkness of judgment.

So, let’s see what the other prophets had to say about it.  Isaiah employs the term in prophecying the coming destruction of Babylon at the hands of the Medes and Persians in Isaiah 13:6-9:

“Wail, for the day of the LORD is near; as destruction from the Almighty it will come!    Therefore all hands will be feeble, and every human heart will melt.  They will be dismayed: pangs and agony will seize them; they will be in anguish like a woman in labor. They will look aghast at one another; their faces will be aflame.  Behold, the day of the LORD comes, cruel, with wrath and fierce anger, to make the land a desolation and to destroy its sinners from it.”  [Isaiah 13:6-9]

Matthew Henry, in his concise commentary, offers the following comments on this passage:

“We have here the terrible desolation of Babylon by the Medes and Persians. Those who in the day of their peace were proud, and haughty, and terrible, are quite dispirited when trouble comes. Their faces shall be scorched with the flame. All comfort and hope shall fail. The stars of heaven shall not give their light, the sun shall be darkened. Such expressions are often employed by the prophets, to describe the convulsions of governments. God will visit them for their iniquity, particularly the sin of pride, which brings men low. There shall be a general scene of horror. Those who join themselves to Babylon, must expect to share her plagues, Rev_18:4. All that men have, they would give for their lives, but no man’s riches shall be the ransom of his life. Pause here and wonder that men should be thus cruel and inhuman, and see how corrupt the nature of man is become. And that little infants thus suffer, which shows that there is an original guilt, by which life is forfeited as soon as it is begun. The day of the Lord will, indeed, be terrible with wrath and fierce anger, far beyond all here stated. Nor will there be any place for the sinner to flee to, or attempt an escape. But few act as though they believed these things.”

Conclusion:  The Day of the Lord is a time of dismay, agony, anguish desolation and judgment.  It comes cruelly with wrath and fierce anger.

Jeremiah employs the term utilizing vivid terms of battle to describe God’s judgment against Egypt:

“That day is the day of the Lord GOD of hosts, a day of vengeance, to avenge himself on his foes. The sword shall devour and be sated and drink its fill of their blood. For the Lord GOD of hosts holds a sacrifice in the north country by the river Euphrates.”  [Jeremiah 46:10]

Conclusion:  The Day of the Lord is a day of God’s vengeance against his enemies.  It involves great bloodshed as God executes his judgment against his enemies.

Ezekiel refers to the Day of the Lord in two separate passages.  In the first, he laments that because of the false prophets, Israel has not adequately prepared itself for the coming Day of the Lord.  In the second, Ezekiel offers a gloomy vision of that day in the judgment against Egypt.

“Thus says the Lord GOD, Woe to the foolish prophets who follow their own spirit, and have seen nothing!  Your prophets have been like jackals among ruins, O Israel.  You have not gone up into the breaches, or built up a wall for the house of Israel, that it might stand in battle in the day of the LORD.” [Ezekiel 13:3-5]

“The word of the LORD came to me:  “Son of man, prophesy, and say, Thus says the Lord GOD: “Wail, ‘Alas for the day!’  For the day is near, the day of the LORD is near; it will be a day of clouds, a time of doom for the nations. A sword shall come upon Egypt, and anguish shall be in Cush, when the slain fall in Egypt, and her wealth is carried away, and her foundations are torn down. Cush, and Put, and Lud, and all Arabia, and Libya, and the people of the land that is in league, shall fall with them by the sword.”   [Ezekiel 30:1-5]

Conclusion:  The Day of the Lord is a day of battle that must be prepared for.  It is a day marked by clouds and doom.

The prophet Joel includes a number of sections referencing the Day of the Lord.  The first warns of its imminence of the Day of the Lord reflecting the judgment against Israel by use of a locust invasion:

“Consecrate a fast; call a solemn assembly.  Gather the elders and all the inhabitants of the land to the house of the Lord your God, and cry out to the Lord. Alas for the day! For the day of the Lord is near, and as destruction from the Almighty it comes.  Is not the food cut off before our eyes, joy and gladness from the house of our God?” [Joel 1:14-16]

Conclusion: The Day of the Lord is marked by famine and a lack of joy.  Our response to its imminence should be repentance on the part of God’s followers.

Further description of the Day of the Lord is offered in the very next chapter:

“Blow a trumpet in Zion; sound an alarm on my holy mountain! Let all the inhabitants of the land tremble, for the day of the LORD is coming; it is near, a day of darkness and gloom, a day of clouds and thick darkness! Like blackness there is spread upon the mountains a great and powerful people; their like has never been before, nor will be again after them through the years of all generations.

Fire devours before them, and behind them a flame burns. The land is like the garden of Eden before them, but behind them a desolate wilderness, and nothing escapes them.  Their appearance is like the appearance of horses, and like war horses they run.  As with the rumbling of chariots, they leap on the tops of the mountains, like the crackling of a flame of fire devouring the stubble, like a powerful army drawn up for battle.

The LORD utters his voice before his army, for his camp is exceedingly great; he who executes his word is powerful. For the day of the LORD is great and very awesome; who can endure it?”  [Joel 2:1-11]

“The sun shall be turned to darkness, and the moon to blood, before the great and awesome day of the LORD comes.  And it shall come to pass that everyone who calls on the name of the LORD shall be saved. For in Mount Zion and in Jerusalem there shall be those who escape, as the LORD has said, and among the survivors shall be those whom the LORD calls.”  [Joel 2:30-31]

Conclusion:  The Day of the Lord is a day of darkness, gloom and clouds.  It devours like fire and leaves desolation in its path.  Nothing escapes it.  It brings anguish.  It will be a great and awesome day which no one can endure.  The sun will go dark before that day comes, but there is hope.  However, anyone who calls on the name of the Lord before that day will be saved.

Finally, Joel looks forward to a future Day of the Lord and provides us with a description of what the battle on that day will be like:

“Proclaim this among the nations: Consecrate for war; stir up the mighty men. Let all the men of war draw near; let them come up.  Beat your plowshares into swords, and your pruning hooks into spears; let the weak say, “I am a warrior.” Hasten and come, all you surrounding nations, and gather yourselves there. Bring down your warriors, O LORD.  Let the nations stir themselves up and come up to the Valley of Jehoshaphat; for there I will sit to judge all the surrounding nations.

Put in the sickle, for the harvest is ripe. Go in, tread, for the winepress is full. The vats overflow, for their evil is great. Multitudes, multitudes, in the valley of decision! For the day of the LORD is near in the valley of decision. The sun and the moon are darkened, and the stars withdraw their shining. The LORD roars from Zion, and utters his voice from Jerusalem, and the heavens and the earth quake. But the LORD is a refuge to his people, a stronghold to the people of Israel.”  [Joel 3:9-16]

Conclusion:  At some point in the future, there will be another Day of the Lord in which the great armies of the world will line up against God in the valley of decision for his judgment.

Obadiah uses the term in reference to the coming judgment of Edom.

For the day of the LORD is near upon all the nations. As you have done, it shall be done to you; your deeds shall return on your own head.  For as you have drunk on my holy mountain, so all the nations shall drink continually; they shall drink and swallow, and shall be as though they had never been.  [Obadiah 1:15-16]

Conclusion: Edom and the nations would drink of the retribution of God for their sins against Israel on the Day of the Lord.

Zephaniah’s use of the term for the judgment against Judah is as follows:

“Be silent before the Lord GOD! For the day of the LORD is near; the LORD has prepared a sacrifice and consecrated his guests.  And on the day of the LORD’s sacrifice– “I will punish the officials and the king’s sons and all who array themselves in foreign attire.

On that day I will punish everyone who leaps over the threshold, and those who fill their master’s house with violence and fraud.  ”On that day,” declares the LORD, “a cry will be heard from the Fish Gate, a wail from the Second Quarter, a loud crash from the hills.  Wail, O inhabitants of the Mortar! For all the traders are no more; all who weigh out silver are cut off.  At that time I will search Jerusalem with lamps, and I will punish the men who are complacent, those who say in their hearts, ‘The LORD will not do good, nor will he do ill.’  Their goods shall be plundered, and their houses laid waste. Though they build houses, they shall not inhabit them; though they plant vineyards, they shall not drink wine from them.”  The great day of the LORD is near, near and hastening fast; the sound of the day of the LORD is bitter; the mighty man cries aloud there.  A day of wrath is that day, a day of distress and anguish, a day of ruin and devastation, a day of darkness and gloom, a day of clouds and thick darkness, a day of trumpet blast and battle cry against the fortified cities and against the lofty battlements.

I will bring distress on mankind, so that they shall walk like the blind, because they have sinned against the LORD; their blood shall be poured out like dust, and their flesh like dung.  Neither their silver nor their gold shall be able to deliver them on the day of the wrath of the LORD. In the fire of his jealousy, all the earth shall be consumed; for a full and sudden end he will make of all the inhabitants of the earth.” [Zephaniah 1:7-18]

Conclusion:  The Day of the Lord will bring punishment for the wicked and wailing.  God will judge those convinced that he does not judge good or evil.  It will be a day of wrath, distress, anguish, ruin, devastation, darkness, gloom and clouds.  It will bring distress on man such that they walk like the blind.  Blood will be poured out, and the earth will be consumed.

Finally, Malachi refers to the Day of the Lord as the time when the Lord would become man:

“Behold, I will send you Elijah the prophet before the great and awesome day of the LORD comes. And he will turn the hearts of fathers to their children and the hearts of children to their fathers, lest I come and strike the land with a decree of utter destruction.”  [Malachi 4:5-6]

Conclusion:  Here the prophet is clearly referring to the condescension of God in taking on human flesh and dying on the cross for our sins.

New Testament References

There are also references to the Day of the Lord in the New Testament.  In Acts, Luke recounts Peter’s words indicating that the prophecy of Joel was at least partially fulfilled on the day of Pentecost:

“For these people are not drunk, as you suppose, since it is only the third hour of the day.  But this is what was uttered through the prophet Joel: “‘And in the last days it shall be, God declares, that I will pour out my Spirit on all flesh, and your sons and your daughters shall prophesy, and your young men shall see visions, and your old men shall dream dreams; even on my male servants and female servants in those days I will pour out my Spirit, and they shall prophesy.  And I will show wonders in the heavens above and signs on the earth below, blood, and fire, and vapor of smoke;  the sun shall be turned to darkness and the moon to blood, before the day of the Lord comes, the great and magnificent day. And it shall come to pass that everyone who calls upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.’” [Acts 2:15-21]

Conclusion: The prophecies of the Day of the Lord can have both short-term and long-term fulfillment.

In Romans, Paul reminds us that on the Day of Wrath, God will exercise his righteous judgment:

“Or do you presume on the riches of his kindness and forbearance and patience, not knowing that God’s kindness is meant to lead you to repentance?  But because of your hard and impenitent heart you are storing up wrath for yourself on the day of wrath when God’s righteous judgment will be revealed.  He will render to each one according to his works: to those who by patience in well-doing seek for glory and honor and immortality, he will give eternal life; but for those who are self-seeking and do not obey the truth, but obey unrighteousness, there will be wrath and fury.  There will be tribulation and distress for every human being who does evil, the Jew first and also the Greek, but glory and honor and peace for everyone who does good, the Jew first and also the Greek. For God shows no partiality.”  [Romans 2:4-11]

Conclusion: The future Day of Wrath will bring judgment for both the righteous and the wicked.

In 1^st Corinthians, Paul speaks once again of the Day of the Lord:

“It is actually reported that there is sexual immorality among you, and of a kind that is not tolerated even among pagans, for a man has his father’s wife.  And you are arrogant! Ought you not rather to mourn? Let him who has done this be removed from among you.  For though absent in body, I am present in spirit; and as if present, I have already pronounced judgment on the one who did such a thing.  When you are assembled in the name of the Lord Jesus and my spirit is present, with the power of our Lord Jesus, you are to deliver this man to Satan for the destruction of the flesh, so that his spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord.” [1 Corinthians 1:1-5]

Conclusion: The Day of the Lord will bring judgment when we will either by condemned or saved by God.

In 1^st Thessalonians, Paul talks about the coming Day of the Lord:

“Now concerning the times and the seasons, brothers, you have no need to have anything written to you.  For you yourselves are fully aware that the day of the Lord will come like a thief in the night.  While people are saying, “There is peace and security,” then sudden destruction will come upon them as labor pains come upon a pregnant woman, and they will not escape.  But you are not in darkness, brothers, for that day to surprise you like a thief.” [1 Thessalonians 5:1-4]

Conclusion: There will be no warning that the future Day of the Lord is coming.  We should be prepared at all times for that day will bring sudden destruction.

In 2^nd Thessalonians, Paul tells us more about the Day of the Lord:

“Now concerning the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ and our being gathered together to him, we ask you, brothers, not to be quickly shaken in mind or alarmed, either by a spirit or a spoken word, or a letter seeming to be from us, to the effect that the day of the Lord has come.  Let no one deceive you in any way. For that day will not come, unless the rebellion comes first, and the man of lawlessness is revealed, the son of destruction, who opposes and exalts himself against every so-called god or object of worship, so that he takes his seat in the temple of God, proclaiming himself to be God.  Do you not remember that when I was still with you I told you these things?  And you know what is restraining him now so that he may be revealed in his time.  For the mystery of lawlessness is already at work. Only he who now restrains it will do so until he is out of the way.  And then the lawless one will be revealed, whom the Lord Jesus will kill with the breath of his mouth and bring to nothing by the appearance of his coming.  The coming of the lawless one is by the activity of Satan with all power and false signs and wonders, and with all wicked deception for those who are perishing, because they refused to love the truth and so be saved.  Therefore God sends them a strong delusion, so that they may believe what is false, in order that all may be condemned who did not believe the truth but had pleasure in unrighteousness.”  [2 Thessalonians 2:1-12]

Conclusion: There will be no mistaking the Day of the Lord.  Only God currently restrains that day from coming.

Peter tells us more about the circumstances surrounding the coming Day of the Lord:

“But the day of the Lord will come like a thief, and then the heavens will pass away with a roar, and the heavenly bodies will be burned up and dissolved, and the earth and the works that are done on it will be exposed.  Since all these things are thus to be dissolved, what sort of people ought you to be in lives of holiness and godliness, waiting for and hastening the coming of the day of God, because of which the heavens will be set on fire and dissolved, and the heavenly bodies will melt as they burn!”  [2 Peter 3:10-12]

Conclusion: The Day of the Lord will come like a thief.  On that day, the heavens will pass away.  Based on this knowledge we should live lives of righteousness and holiness.

Finally, in Revelation John tells us that there will be a battle on the Day of the Lord between God and the forces of Evil:

“For they are demonic spirits, performing signs, who go abroad to the kings of the whole world, to assemble them for battle on the great day of God the Almighty.  (“Behold, I am coming like a thief! Blessed is the one who stays awake, keeping his garments on, that he may not go about naked and be seen exposed!”)  And they assembled them at the place that in Hebrew is called Armageddon.”  [Revelation 16:14-16]

Conclusion: There will be a great battle at Armageddon on the coming Day of the Lord.

What then shall we say about the Day of the Lord?

The Day of the Lord is not a single day in history or in the future.  It has been, and will be, repeated throughout the history of man as God brings forth just judgment against those who sin against him.  Prophets like Amos, Isaiah, Jeremiah, Ezekiel, Joel, and Obadiah referred to the Day of the Lord as judgment against individual nations which have already come to fruition.  Malachi refers to the Day of the Lord as that time when God would take on human flesh to come to this earth to be tempted like us yet sinless and to die on the cross for our sins and be raised on the third day to live forever.  Joel and Zephaniah refer to a yet future day when God will come to judge mankind.  In the New Testament book of Acts, Peter explains that Pentecost represents the partial fulfillment of prophecy regarding the Day of the Lord.  The remainder of the New Testament references are to a future Day of the Lord where the human race will be judged.

So, the Day of the Lord seems to have multiple meanings and connotations, so what is the common theme?  The common theme is judgment and repentance.  We will all be judged by God for our actions and attitudes. Repentance can stave off the Day of the Lord or keep people safe during that fateful day.  Only by the saving grace of our Lord Jesus Christ will we be kept safe on the future Day of the Lord.  That day is coming, and we should live our lives in such a way to avoid the horror of that day and pray that by God’s grace when we stand before him he will say, “Well done good and faithful servant.”

Related posts:

1. The Wrath of God
2. Wayne's Random Thoughts…Monthly Round Up (May 2009)
3. Monday Morning Prophecy #25 – The Messiah Would Heal The Blind

Anyhow, in doing some research on what idolatry, I came across the following a Spurgeon sermon entitled “Idols Abolished.”  In the following excerpt, Spurgeon looks at the idol of self-righteousness.  If you can read what he has to say and not feel at all convicted, you might what to examine whether your heart has been hardened to your own self-righteousness and pray that God would search your heart and reveal any such idol to you.  There is an even more powerful portion of the sermon on idolatry and the cross of Christ, but I am saving that for the introduction to the “American Idols” series.  Here is what Spurgeon has to say about self-righteousness:

Attend earnestly, dear hearers, for perhaps some of you may be worshipping idols now. We will go into the temple of your heart and see whether we can find a false god there. I go into one heart, and, as I look up, I see a gigantic idol; it is gilded all over and clothed in shining robes: its eyes seem to be jewels, and its forehead is “as bright ivory overlaid with sapphires”; it is a very lovely idol to look upon. Come not too close, do not examine too severely, nor so much as dream of looking inside the hollow sham. Within it you will find all manner of rottenness and filthiness, but the outside of the idol is adorned with the greatest art and skill, and you may even become enamored of it a you stand and gaze upon it.

What is its name? Its name is self-righteousness. Well do I remember when I used to worship this image which my own hands had made, till one morning my god had his head broken off, and by-and-by I found his hands were gone, and soon I found that the worm was devouring it, and my god that I worshipped and trusted in turned out to be a heap of dross and dung, whereas I had thought it to be a mass of solid gold, with eyes of diamonds. Alas, there are many men to whom no such revelation has been given. Their idol is still in first-rate condition. True, perhaps, at Christmas-time it gets a little out of order, and they feel that they did not quite behave as they ought when the bottle went round so freely, but they have called in the goldsmith to overlay the idol with new gold and gild the chipped places afresh. Have they not been to church since then? Did they not go on Christmas morning to a place of worship, and make it all right? Have they not repeated extra prayers, and given a little more away in charity? So they have furbished their god up again, and he looks very respectable. Ah, it is easy to tinker him up, my brethren, until the ark of the Lord comes in, and then all the smiths in the world cannot keep this god erect. If the gospel of Jesus Christ once enters into the soul, then, straightway, this wonderful god begins to bow himself, and, like Dagon, who was broken before the ark of the Lord, self-righteousness is dashed to pieces. But there are thousands all over this world who worship this god, and I will tell you how they pray to it. They say, “God, I thank thee that I am not as other men are,” and so on, not exactly in the Pharisee’s language, but after the same style. “Lord, I thank thee that I pay everybody twenty shillings in the pound, and have brought up my children respectably. God, I thank thee that I have been a regular churchgoing or chapel-going man all my life. God, I thank thee that I am not a swearer, nor yet a drunkard, nor anything of that kind. I am far better than most people; and if I do not get to heaven it will be very bad for my neighbors, for they are not half as good as I am.” In this manner is this monstrous deity adored. I am not speaking of what is done in Hindustan, but of an idolatry very fashionable in England. The god of self-righteousness is lord paramount[2] in millions of hearts. Oh, that every worshipper of that god may be led to say, “What have I to do any more with this abominable idol?”

I had enough to do with my self-righteousness, I do boldly say; for, oh, how I loathe to think that I should ever have been such a fool as to think that there was anything good in me—to think that I could ever have dreamed of coming before God with a righteousness of my own. Oh, how I abhor the thought! God forbid for one single moment that I should ever be other than ashamed of having boasted in aught that I could do or feel or be. Do you not feel yourselves humiliated at the remembrance of such pride and presumption? What have you to do any more with the idol of righteous self? Nothing. We can never bow down before that any more.

Related posts:

1. Wayne's Random Thoughts…Monthly Round Up (May 2009)
2. American Idol – I Like it When the Good Guys Win!
3. Samuel and His Teachers (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 10)

Throughout the history of the Christian church, men have endeavored to record the core fundamental beliefs of their faith.  Through creeds, catechisms, and other writings, they have sought to summarize and memorialize their beliefs and convictions.  I am not a theologian…just a simple sinner saved by the grace of Almighty God.  That said, as Christians we are all members of a royal priesthood, and I believe that it is important to know what we believe and to be able to state it clearly for others.  As a father and a worker in Children’s Ministry, I have found that this is especially important in order to be able to answer questions raised by kids with clear, concise, and generally brief answers.

So, I decided a useful exercise would be to begin to record my Christian beliefs in short concise statements (I hope).  I do not intend for these to represent my own personal systematic theology or to cover all aspects of the Christian faith.  It is not my intent to expand on the why of my beliefs, but simply to list what my beliefs are.  I also don’t have a plan for how frequently I might put one of these entries together.  Instead they will represent my feeble attempt to respond to the prompting of the Holy Spirit think a little more deeply about what I believe about selected doctrines and issues.  That said, I want these entries to represent what I believe and not just what “I feel.”  The heart is, after all, “deceitful above all things.”  So, I will endeavor to include scripture references wherever possible.  I think of it as a cheat sheet for what I believe.

So, that is WHAT I am doing.  The next logical question is, WHY am I recording them here on my blog.  There are actually three reasons,

1. Why not?  I’ll already have them written down.
2. I hope in some small way that they may help someone to clarify their own beliefs.
3. I am hoping that the readers of this blog can help me out.  I am not a trained theologian.  I’ve never been to seminary.  The closest I’ve ever come to a class on Systematic Theology is that I own Wayne Grudem’s book.  I read my Bible, but I don’t consider myself a scholar.  If I miss something or misstate something, I hope that someone will point it out!

I’ve decided to start with my beliefs on the issue of sin.  There have been a lot in the news stories recently where people have been ridiculed, lambasted or otherwise ridiculed for their beliefs on particular sins (be that abortion, homosexuality, marriage, divorce, or anything else).  Rather than addressing each sin individually, it seemed like a good time to step back and examine my beliefs on sin in general.

Here’s what I believe:

What is Sin?

• Sin is anything contrary to the will of God. [Joshua 1:18, Psalm 66:18, Isaiah 59:2, 1 John 5:17]
• Sin is of the Devil. [John 8:44, 1 John 3:8-9]

Where did sin come from/who sins?

• God created the world without sin. [Genesis 1:10, Genesis 1:12, Genesis 1:18, Genesis 1:21, Genesis 1:25]
• Sin entered the world through one man. [Genesis 3:6-7, Romans 5:12]
• We are conceived and born in sin. [Job 15:14, Job 25:4, Psalm 51:5, Psalm 58:3]
• Everybody sins. [1 Kings 8:46, Psalm 14:1-3, Psalm 53:1-3, Psalm 143:2, Ecclesiastes 7:20, Romans 3:9-12, Romans 3:23, James 3:2, 1 John 1:8-10]

Who do we sin against?

• When we sin, we sin against God. [Psalm 51:1-4, Romans 8:7]

What is God’s response to Sin?

• God is without sin. [Deuteronomy 32:4]
• There is no sin in heaven. [Revelation 22:3-4]
• God hates sin. [Deuteronomy 25:16, Psalm 5:4-6, Psalm 11:5, Proverbs 3:32, Proverbs 6:16-19, Proverbs 11:20, Proverbs 15:26, Luke 16:15]
• Sin brings the wrath of God. [Matthew 5:27-28]
• We will be called to give an account to God of our sins. [2 Corinthians 5:10]
• God knows our sin, and it will be exposed. [Psalm 44:21, Psalm 90:8, Isaiah 29:15, Isaiah 59:6, Matthew 10:26, Luke 8:17, Luke 12:2-3, 1 Timothy 5:24, James 3:20]
• God will judge our sins. [Ecclesiastes 12:14, Romans 2:16, Revelation 2:23]
• Man cannot cleanse himself of sin. [Job 9:30-31, Proverbs 20:9, Jeremiah 2:22]

What is the outcome/penalty for Sin?

• Sin separates us from God eternally. [Matthew 7:21-23, Matthew 25:11, 1 Corinthians 6:9-10, Galatians 5:19-21, Ephesians 5:5, Hebrews 12:14, Revelation 21:27]
• Jesus is the only man to ever live who never sinned. [Isaiah 53:4-5, 2 Corinthians 5:21, Hebrews 4:15, Hebrews 7:26, 1 John 3:5]
• The penalty for sin is death. [Genesis 2:17, Exodus 32:33, Ezekiel 18:4, Romans 1:32, Romans 6:23, 1 Corinthians 15:56, Ephesians 2:1, James 1:15]

What is the solution to our sin problem?

• Man is incapable of fixing his own sin problem. [Job 9:30-31, Proverbs 20:9, Jeremiah 2:22]
• Only God can forgive sin. [Exodus 34:7, Daniel 9:9, Micah 7:18, Mark 2:7]
• Christ died on the cross to pay the cost of my sin. [Isaiah 1:18, Matthew 26:28, John 1:29, Romans 3:25, Ephesians 1:7, Hebrews 2:17, Hebrews 9:14, 1 Peter 2:24, 1 John 1:7, 1 John 1:9, 1 John 2:2, 1 John 3:5, 1 John 4:10]
• Man’s sin is imputed to Christ. [2 Corinthians 5:19, 1 Peter 2:24]
• God forgives our sins for his name’s sake. [1 John 2:12]

What are the characteristics of sin?

• Sin includes both actions and attitude. [Exodus 20:17, Colossians 3:5-6, Hebrews 13:5]
• Condoning sin in others is a sin. [Romans 1:32]
• Sins of omission are as bad as sins of commission. [James 4:17]
• Sin comes from the heart. [Proverbs 4:23, Jeremiah 17:9, Matthew 15:19, Luke 6:45]
• Anything that does not come from faith is sin. [Romans 14:23]
• Sin is foolish. [Proverbs 24:9]
• Sin deceives us. [Hebrews 3:13]

What are the effects of sin?

• Sin makes us slaves to sin. [John 8:34, Romans 6:12-17]
• Sin has a cumulative effect. Left unchecked it will continue to grow. [Deuteronomy 29:19, Jeremiah 9:3, Hosea 13:2, 2 Timothy 3:13]
• Sin causes suffering. [Deuteronomy 31:17-18, Psalm 38:3, James 1:14-15]

Do Christians Sin?

• Christians still sin but are no longer slaves to sin. [Romans 6:18, Romans 6:21, Romans 7:17, Romans 7:23, 1 John 3:9]
• Christians who sin damage their fellowship with God. [Ephesians 4:30, 2 Corinthians 5:10, 1 John 1:6-7]
• Part of Christian life is setting aside sin. [Hebrews 12:1]

How do we combat / react to our sin?

• Knowledge of God’s Word helps to prevent sin. [Psalm 17:4, Psalm 119:11]
• Sin must be confessed. [Psalm 32:5, Proverbs 28:3, James 5:16, 1 John 1:9-10]
• We should not deny our sin. [1 John 1:10]
• We should pray about our sin. [Job 13:23, Psalm 19:3, Psalm 51:2, Psalm 139:23-24, Matthew 6:13, Luke 11:4]

Return to the I Believe… index page.

Related posts:

1. 25 NOT SO Random Things About Me
2. I believe…What I Believe About Faith
3. December 18 – Hark! The Herald Angels Sing (A Christmas Carol Advent)

Several interesting points were raised during the debate, and I think there are some fascinating items to reflect on, so I thought I would do this blog entry with my thoughts.  I have not taken a lot of time to organize my thoughts, but I wanted to point out some of the high and low points. I also promised some preliminary thoughts in The Christian Forum (http://www.facebook.com/home.php#/group.php?gid=19371839356) a Facebook group I administer.  So, here goes!

If I’m not mistaken, the debate aired late last week on Nightline, but the debate can be still seen online at:

http://www.abcnews.go.com/Nightline/FaceOff/

I am familiar with Pastor Driscoll.  His blog is one that I subscribe to and check regularly, and I’ve recently added his weekly sermon series to my Podcasts.  I have heard of Mr. Chopra, but I had not heard of either of the other two participants.  My point in this blog is not to attack any of them personally but to address their viewpoints and make some observations about those viewpoints.  Some summary of where each person in the debate stood on the issue of Satan would probably be useful:

Mark Driscoll: took what I would call the Biblical viewpoint that Satan does exist, was created by God as an angel, rebelled and fell from grace, and will be conquered and defeated by Jesus in the final days.

Annie Lobart: believes in Satan and demonic forces and claims to have been physically raped by demons that she could not see.

Deepak Chopra: believes that all belief is a cover up for insecurity (and yes, I note the self-contradiction inherent in that statement).  He believes part of us is a “shadow” that is in guilt and shame.  This shadow comes from separation from our divine source.  People who obsess over sin, guilt and shame then project that out as the mythical figure we call Satan. He believes healthy people have no need for Satan, and that people need to confront thier own issues and understand themselves.

Carlton Pearson: believes that Satan is not real and that a loving God would not send people to an eternal hell.  He believes that Satan is a personal manifestation of people who want to believe in him.

Pastor Driscoll started the debate with a good presentation of the Gospel including a description of the fall, the need for Jesus, the incarnation, crucifixion and resurrection of Christ. I thought that, all in all, he did a good job of defending the Christian/Biblical point of view on the issue of Satan and presented a clear gospel picture.

Bishop Pearson made some interesting comments that warrant some discussion.  First, he indicated that he feels that he can choose which parts of the Bible to believe.  It is interesting that so much of the debate, and so many of the divisions, within the nominally Christian church today ultimately boil down to the authority of scripture.  It seems to me that the view that says that we can choose which parts of the Bible to believe makes man the ultimate arbiter of morality and judgment.  I would much rather have God in that position, and I for one am glad that the Bible says that he is in that position.  Mr. Pearson has a markedly post-modern view of the world.  It is clear that he does not believe in absolute truth, and he revealed this numerous times with comments to the effect that certain things were “true to you.”  To be honest, I do not understand this view that there is no absolute truth when it is obvious (when we honestly look inside ourselves) that there are certain things that are always evil, and not just relatively evil depending on the circumstances.  Take slavery for example, is it ever morally OK?   The Bishop also said that lots of people do not know the Scriptures and they are put in a position where they have no hope.  I find this ironic in that our only real hope comes through a relationship with Christ.

Annie Lobert seemed very sincere in her love for Jesus and in her testimony.  The one point she made which was a bit disturbing, though frankly I don’t know she intended it quite this way, was when she indicated that she didn’t care about the “evidence”  presented by the Bishop because she knows what she experienced.  Jesus does change our lives once we accept him, but I think advocating experience alone as justification for belief in Christ is dangerous in that the heart is deceitful above all things.   There is ample proof for Jesus and the claims of the Bible which have nothing to do with our own personal experience, and I cringe a little bit every time I hear somebody say something that could be interpreted as “blind faith.”  One convicting point that she did made for Christians was when she explained that she grew up in a denomination where they were taught that God was angry.  As Christians, we should remember that judgment without grace is legalism and grace without judgment is licentiousness.  It is important that we strike the balance between love and holiness and judgment and grace in teaching about God.

Deepak Chopra seems to believe two things strongly based on this debate.  He believes that all beliefs are a cover up for insecurity and that some people have a “higher enlightenment” and therefore don’t need religion.  And, he believes that all the problems in the world have to do with religious ideology.  One astute audience member of the audience did point out to him that his statement that all belief was a cover up for insecurity was, in fact, a belief.  Mr. Chopra clearly defined where he is coming from, and that is a very naturalistic viewpoint.  He explained that something is only real if you can experience it.  He explained that he has no need for the Devil because he doesn’t have guilt and shame and that evil and suffering comes from ignorance.

When pressed a little bit on his beliefs, Mr. Chopra fell back on the age old argument that most atheists fall back on when they can find nothing better, “What of all the people who have never heard of Jesus?”  Pastor Driscoll made the point that God is a big God and can save whomever he wants, but I would have liked to see him make the point that it is not amazing that God saves only a few but that God saves any!  Finally, Mr. Chopra quite proudly explained that he doesn’t want to hang around with a bunch of people who know the truth.  He would rather hag out with people who seek the truth and run from those who know it.  I think this is another indication of a post-modern “there is no real truth” viewpoint, and despite Mr. Chopra’s self-confessed enlightenment, he does seem to start from the presupposition that there is no truth!  He further confirmed this viewpoint when he expressed that Annie Lobert’s interpretation “works for her” but that doesn’t mean that everyone has to accept it.

In the question and answer section of the debate, Pastor Driscoll made a very valid point that we would do well to remember which is that you can’t blame the Devil for everything in your life.  The Devil can influence us and tempt us, but if we choose to do something, we are morally responsible for it.

Those are my “stream of consciousness” thoughts on the debate.  The Washington Post this week also questions the existence of the Devil in their On Faith section.  There are some interesting articles and viewpoints there as well, but I have not had a chance to read all of them so I won’t make any comments.  You can find it all at:

http://newsweek.washingtonpost.com/onfaith/2009/03/does_satan_exist/all.html

When it comes to debating the existence of Satan, we would do well to remember the words of C.S. Lewis in his introduction to The Screwtape Letters:

“There are two equal and opposite errors into which our race can fall about the devils. One is to disbelieve in their existence. The other is to believe, and to feel an excessive and unhealthy interest in them. They themselves are equally pleased by both errors, and hail a materialist or a magician with the same delight.”

Related posts:

1. The Real Christmas Story
2. The Blog Patrol (April 14, 2009)

“Envy is the art of counting the other fellow’s blessings instead of your own.” …Harold Coffin

“When men are full of envy, they disparage everything, whether it be good or bad”…Publius Cornelius Tacitus

Resentment kills a fool,
and envy slays the simple. (Job 5:2)

Introduction

A couple of weeks ago, I was watching TV with my seven year old boy and five year old girl. We were watching Extreme Home Makeover together before they went to bed. They like the show, and I like the idea that they get to see people helping one another. In that respect, it’s a great show for them to watch.

On this particular episode was the story of a woman with four kids of her own who had promised to watch her sisters ten kids when she died of cancer several years ago. She had fourteen kids and was living in three hotel rooms at the local hotel before ABC showed up. At one point, Lyndsey turned to me and, with the requisite amount of shock and horror said, “Fourteen kids?!?! Aren’t you glad you only have four?” It has nothing to do with envy, but I thought it was cute!

Later in the show they revealed the new house to the family. They always go overboard on the show, and this episode was no exception. The house was over 5,200 square feet with bedrooms large than many houses. Instantly, my five year old said “that guy needs to come to our house!” My seven year old further explained, “Yeah! We need bigger bedrooms.” Now, our house is not huge, but it is not small by any stretch of the imagination, and one of the reasons I bought it was because I liked the big bedrooms for the kids. Talk about a teachable moment! We talked about greed and envy, being content with what we have, and rejoicing for other people when good things happen to them. I’m not sure they really got it, but it was a chance to be thankful for what we do have rather than wish for something someone else has.

Here is a quick test to gauge the extent of envy in your life:

Do you tend to be critical or judgmental of other people?

Does it upset you when someone else gets something you have been wanting?

Are you conscious of your social status and work hard to maintain it?

Are you driven to succeed at virtually any cost?

Do you resent it when people do not acknowledge your accomplishments and achievements?

Do you complain when you feel like you are not being treated fairly?

Do you work hard to cover it up when you are feeling inferior so that other people will not sense your weakness?

Is it hard for you to pay someone a compliment?

Do you discount other people’s successes as just “good luck?”

Do you ever put on a false front so that people will find you impressive?

Is your self-image based on how well you perform in a given situation?

Do you spread rumors or speak negatively about successful people?

Are you willing to sacrifice others to make yourself look good?

Do you compare your good deeds to others and keep score?

Do you ever find yourself “needing” something you didn’t even know existed before your friend got one?

The more times you answered yes to the questions above, the more likely it is that you struggle with the sin of envy. This test is based in part on, and adapted from, the book Mind Over Emotions by Les Carter.

Let’s have another quick look at the description of love from 1 Corinthians 13:

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. [1 Corinthians 13:4-8]

The original word for envy in the Greek encompasses both envy and jealousy. Of the translations I reviewed, 58 translated the word “envy,” and another 23 translated the word “jealous.” Another two included both envy and jealousy in their translation. A couple of translations rendered the passage as not wanting what it doesn’t have or what belongs to others, and one translation reads “not possessive.”

Dictionary.com defines envy as follows:

“a feeling of discontent or covetousness with regard to another’s advantages, success, possessions, etc.”

Envy is the result of desires born out of judging our level of contentment compared to what other people have rather than what we have. As our passage tells us, there is no room for envy or jealousy in love. Love is sacrificial and therefore intends that the one loved would prosper, even at our own expense. Love is not hurt when it comes out 2nd best. Love does not mourn when others rejoice or rejoice at other people’s mourning. Rather, the Bible tells us we should:

Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. (Romans 12:15)

So, what is envy, and where does it come from? Envy is part of our sin nature that we are all born with and must battle against. In is an internal attitude that gives rise to external manifestations and actions. The root of envy is pride, and it is based on a comparison of our attributes and/or belongings to those of other people (real or imaginary). Envy always beings with a desire. The desire itself is not always evil. Desires are fine so long as they are realistic. However, when we begin to view our desires as the thing(s) that gives value to our life, then we have moved past desire to envy. The big problem with envy is that it is insatiable. When you give envy an inch, it takes a mile. When you let desire begin to consume you, it is a short trip into devastation. When envy rules your life, there is no such thing as enough. Take for example the infamous words of James D. Rockefeller. One of the richest men of his day, when he was asked how much money was enough, he answered “One more dollar.” It was a sad statement on his day, and unfortunately, it is still true today.

We live in a society rooted in envy. Watch the commercials during your favorite program sometime. You will find out that you deserve things that you didn’t even know you needed. You will find out that one more, one bigger, one newer, one more expensive thing will bring you happiness. You will see a reflection of a society that believes each individual has a right to have anything and everything that their neighbor does. The rising level of credit card debt in our country is indicative of the insatiable appetite of envy. Unfortunately, we live in a society that truly believes that the grass is always greener on the other side.

The list of things people envy in our society is endless. Common things include:

• Careers
• Social Position
• Looks
• Talents
• Gifts
• Happy marriages
• Successful children
• Wealth
• Friends
• Status
• Cars
• Toys
• Abilities
• And many more

The list of problems caused by envy and jealousy is equally long. Envy leads to malice and bitterness. It warps our perspective and can so consume us that it limits our ability to function properly. Envy corrupts our motives, thoughts and actions. Envy is so focused on the object of the envy that it limits our ability to recognize our own strengths, and it detracts from the object of our envy’s ability to enrich our lives through the very thing or ability which we envy. Envy causes us to compare our weaknesses to others’ strengths. Envy and jealousy leads to barriers between people, division in families, and violence.

What does the Bible say?

The Bible is replete with examples of envy and the harms caused by envy. God’s word does not leave us empty handed in understanding the evils and effects of envy.

Envy of God led Adam and Eve to eat from the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil (Genesis 3). Envy of God’s acceptance and Abel’s sacrifice led Cain to kill Abel (Genesis 4). Sarah gave Hagar to Abraham to have a son then became jealous of that son resulting in a history of violence and confrontation that continues to this day (Genesis 16). Saul was envious of the crowds reaction to David, and it led Saul to try to kill David (1 Samuel 18). David was envious of Uriah’s wife which led him to commit adultery and led to the death of his son (2 Samuel 11). The administrators and satraps were jealous of Daniel’s status and position and contrived a plan to have him killed (Daniel 6). Haman was jealous of the accolades given to Mordecai which eventually led to his own downfall (Esther 6). Peter was envious that he would have to die for Christ and John would live (John 21). And, it was envy and jealousy that led the Chief Priests and the Pharisees to turn Jesus over to be crucified:

9 “Do you want me to release to you the king of the Jews?” asked Pilate, 10 knowing it was out of envy that the chief priests had handed Jesus over to him. (Mark 15:9-10)

The Bible is clear that jealousy and envy are sins and displeasing to God.

14 But if you harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast about it or deny the truth. 15 Such “wisdom” does not come down from heaven but is earthly, unspiritual, of the devil. 16 For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice. (James 3:14-16)

It also makes it clear that envy is worldly and of the Devil. It is no surprise then that envy and jealousy are included in numerous listing of evils included in the Bible. Consider the following examples:

21 For from within, out of men’s hearts, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, 22 greed, malice, deceit, lewdness, envy, slander, arrogance and folly. 23 All these evils come from inside and make a man ‘unclean.’ ” (Mark 7:21-23)

29 They have become filled with every kind of wickedness, evil, greed and depravity. They are full of envy, murder, strife, deceit and malice. They are gossips, 30 slanderers, God-haters, insolent, arrogant and boastful; they invent ways of doing evil; they disobey their parents; 31 they are senseless, faithless, heartless, ruthless. (Romans 1:29-31)

19 The acts of the sinful nature are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; 20 idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions 21 and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God. (Galatians 5:19-21)

Envy and jealousy are also included in other lists of evils at Romans 13:13; 2 Corinthians 12:20 and 1 Timothy 6:4. It is very telling to note the other items included in the previous listings along with envy and jealousy. They include everything from disobeying parents and insolence to hating God, adultery, and murder, as well as everything in between.

That said, the Bible is very clear in its command that we should not envy others:

Do not let your heart envy sinners,
but always be zealous for the fear of the LORD. (Proverbs 23:17)

Do not envy wicked men,
do not desire their company; (Proverbs 24:1)

Interestingly, both of these verses deal with envying sinners and wicked men. While the command against envy is not limited to envy of non-believers it is particularly relevant to believers who may be tempted to envy the actions and/or belongings of those who have not subjected their lives to God.

Lest there be any doubt about the prohibition on envy, God included the command against coveting in the Ten Commandments:

“You shall not covet your neighbor’s house. You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife, or his manservant or maidservant, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor.” (Exodus 20:17)

The Bible is also very clear when it comes to the negative effects of envy. Envy affects the people in our lives, but the Bible makes it clear that one of the principal effects of envy is the negative impact on the one consumed with envy.

Resentment kills a fool,
and envy slays the simple. (Job 5:2)

Envy has a negative impact on the envier. Like unresolved anger, envy can consume us and rot to the very core.

A heart at peace gives life to the body,
but envy rots the bones. (Proverbs 14:30)

Thus far we have looked at the internal impacts of envy on the envier. There are, of course, also external impacts when envy expresses itself. The Bible tells us that envy provokes.

Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other. (Galatians 5:26)

Envy also results in fighting and quarreling. The following verse explains that envy is at the very root of fighting and quarreling and can even lead to worse offenses such as murder if left unchecked.

1 What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you? 2 You want something but don’t get it. You kill and covet, but you cannot have what you want. You quarrel and fight. You do not have, because you do not ask God. (James 4:1-2)

Last week we learned that being unkind can stunt our spiritual growth. Harboring envy also keeps us from a more complete understanding and appreciation of God’s Word thereby limiting our spiritual growth.

1 Therefore, rid yourselves of all malice and all deceit, hypocrisy, envy, and slander of every kind. 2 Like newborn babies, crave pure spiritual milk, so that by it you may grow up in your salvation, (1 Peter 2:1-2)

This verse makes it clear that we must set aside envy in our lives. So, how do we do that? Again, the Bible provides clear guidance. Jesus made it clear that the antidote to envy, as well as numerous other numerous other moral shortcomings is love.

9 The commandments, “Do not commit adultery,” “Do not murder,” “Do not steal,” “Do not covet,” and whatever other commandment there may be, are summed up in this one rule: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” 10 Love does no harm to its neighbor. Therefore love is the fulfillment of the law. (Romans 13:9-10)

So, not only does love not envy, it is also the cure for envy!

Furthermore, we must recognize that envy is born out of discontentment. At its core, envy represents discontentment with God as our creator, father and shepherd. When we are jealous or envious of others, we are really saying to God that he failed us in how he created us or the circumstances of our lives that he has placed us in. Envy represents a lack of security and confidence in God’s plan and purpose for our life. Therefore, finding contentment represents another cure for envy.

Psalm 73 presents a biblical example of how contentment with God can reverse the effects of envy in our lives.

2 But as for me, my feet had almost slipped;
I had nearly lost my foothold.

3 For I envied the arrogant
when I saw the prosperity of the wicked.

16 When I tried to understand all this,
it was oppressive to me

17 till I entered the sanctuary of God;
then I understood their final destiny.

25 Whom have I in heaven but you?
And earth has nothing I desire besides you.

26 My flesh and my heart may fail,
but God is the strength of my heart
and my portion forever. (Psalm 73:2-3, 16-17, 25-26)

The Psalmist suffers with envy and searches for a natural explanation or remedy to no avail. Only after he realizes that contentment comes only through a relationship with God is he able to overcome his envy. Paul also modeled contentment for us and spoke to the importance of contentment in our spiritual lives.

11 I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. 12 I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. 13 I can do everything through him who gives me strength. 19 And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:11-13, 19)

The writer of Hebrews makes it perfectly clear.

Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.” (Hebrews 13:5)

Our contentment comes from our Heavenly Father who provides everything we need. We often fail to see the blessings God has given us when we focus on earthly rather than eternal things. Envy is a clear sign of worldliness.

You are still worldly. For since there is jealousy and quarreling among you, are you not worldly? Are you not acting like mere men? (1 Corinthians 3:3)

As Christians, our minds should be focused on Christ and things above.

1 Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. 2 Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. (Colossians 3:1-2)

The Bible points out the simple truth that we came into this world with nothing and we will leave it with nothing. Accordingly, all of our actions and decisions in this world should be made with an eye towards their eternal consequences. The things of this world are minor in comparison.

6 But godliness with contentment is great gain. 7 For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. 8 But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that. (1 Timothy 6:6-8)

Envy is rooted in selfishness. When we share our worldly goods, we fight the urge to envy and experience the joy that comes with giving.

Finally, the Bible reminds us that we should be thankful in all things.

Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. (1 Thessalonians 5:18)

When we are focused on, and thankful for, the things we already have, it is hard to envy those things which we do not have.

Envy and Marriage

Just as envy and love can not coexist, there is no place for envy in marriage. Envy and jealousy can take several forms when it comes to marriage, and all are equally dangerous to the health and longevity of any marriage.

The first avenue for envy in a marriage occurs where one partner is envious of the other. Take for example the case of a stay-at-home mother and a working dad. The stay-at-home mother can easily become envious of the fact that her husband does not have to deal with the minute-to-minute headaches of dealing with kids, engages in adult conversation every day, and does not have to worry about making sure that the kids are where they need to be at all times. On the flip side, the husband can easily become envious of the fact that his wife does have so much time to spend with the kids, the relationship that develops because of all that time spent together, the fact that she does not have to deal with the headaches that come along with being in the workforce, and many other things. This envy can lead to resentment, bitterness, arguments, and sometimes even irreparable damage to the relationship. It is easy to lose sight of our own blessings and focus on those things that someone else has – even when that other person is our spouse. Rather than wasting our energy on envying our spouse, we should delight in their gifts and opportunities.

In marriage, we can also find ourselves envious of other peoples’ marriages. Regardless of how strong or week our own marriage is, there is always another couple out there (real or fictional) who will have a “better marriage.” Perhaps they laugh a little bit more; maybe they yell less; maybe they work through their issues in a more rational way. Maybe they don’t have the same kind of concerns over finances or kids or health issues. No matter what the circumstances, it is always possible to find someone, or a couple, who just has it easier or better than we do. The problem is that when we focus on someone else’s marriage and wish ours were more like it, we begin to live in a fantasy world when we should be focusing our efforts on how we can make changes in our own marriage to make it better.

Lastly, we must guard ourselves and our marriages from a possessive jealousy. Unlike envy, jealousy is not a sin in and of itself. Indeed, if there is a reason for the jealousy, it is appropriate in a marriage as a means of protecting the sanctity of that marriage. However, when jealousy becomes irrational, all consuming and possessive, it moves beyond the realm of protection and into sin. Far from protecting your marriage, this type of possessive jealousy can drive spouses apart.

It has become a bit of a cliché, but we should remember that marriage is a partnership – a team. It is not, and cannot be, a competition. We should strive for the betterment of our spouse through our actions, but never demand it through their actions. Everything we do in our marriages should be to edify and build up our spouses, and when we let envy and jealousy seep into our outlook, we limit our ability to do that and put our marriages in jeopardy.

Envy and kids

It is no surprise that kids compete for their parents’ attention, and as parents we have to make sure that we do not foster envy and jealousy between siblings. The worst thing a parent can do in this regard is to play favorites. No parent will admit that they have a favorite child, but many parents certainly act as if they do. Kids are very astute, and they pick up on those clues from their parents. The results can be devastating to a family and can include fighting, strife, broken relationships and closed hearts. The Bible includes a couple of classic examples of what can happen when this type of envy overtakes a family.

Genesis 25-27 tells the story of Jacob and Esau. It tells us that:

Isaac, who had a taste for wild game, loved Esau, but Rebekah loved Jacob. (Genesis 25:28)

This favoritism led to competition among the kids and ultimately led Rebekah to help Jacob deceive Isaac and steal the birthright which Isaac intended to give to Esau.

Esau’s envy and jealousy, and Jacob’s deceit led Esau to a murderous plan:

Esau held a grudge against Jacob because of the blessing his father had given him. He said to himself, “The days of mourning for my father are near; then I will kill my brother Jacob.” (Genesis 27:41)

Jacob fled from Esau and spent years apart from his family. It is no surprise that Jacob continued this pattern of playing favorites as set by his parents and had a favorite son of his own. Genesis 37 tells us that:

3 Now Israel loved Joseph more than any of his other sons, because he had been born to him in his old age; and he made a richly ornamented robe for him. 4 When his brothers saw that their father loved him more than any of them, they hated him and could not speak a kind word to him. (Genesis 37:3-4)

The results of this was bitter envy amongst Joseph’s brothers led them to plan to kill him, eventually sell him into slavery in Egypt and lie to their Dad about Joseph’s fate. It is clear from Genesis 44 that the loss of his favorite son still haunted Jacob years later.

There is one final word of warning to parents when it comes to envy. We must also make sure that we don’t find ourselves in a position where we envy our kids. Many parents envy their kids youth and opportunity and view their kid’s childhood as a chance for the parents to relive their youth vicariously. If the kids’ soccer games and baseball games I’ve been to, and the overbearing and over-involved parents I’ve come across, are any indication, then this is becoming an epidemic in our country. As parents, it is important that we let our kids live their own lives free from our preconceptions and dreams for them.

Envy has been described as a “green-eyed monster.” It is a monster that can consume us entirely if given a foothold, and there is no place for envy in love!

Return to the Love That Surpasses All Knowledge (A Biblical Definition of Love) index page.

Related posts:

1. The Power of Kindness
2. Hurry Up and Wait!
3. 5 Things Kids Must Know About Sin (#2 Where Does Sin Come From?)

Originally posted October 1, 2008 on Facebook

“Love demands the perfecting of the beloved; that the mere ‘kindness’
which tolerates anything except suffering in its object is,
in that respect, at the opposite pole from Love.” Larry Crabb

Make sure that nobody pays back wrong for wrong, but always try to be
kind to each other and to everyone else. (1 Thessalonians 5:15)

Introduction

There is something missing in our world today. I used to think I was just getting older, but the more I watch, the more evident it seems to me. Kindness seems to have become a thing of the past. We give it lip service – “Be kind, Please rewind!” or even the movement for “Random Acts of Kindness,” but when it comes to our individual lives, we seem to have forgotten it. We teach our kids the basics of kindness – “please,” “thank you,” “excuse me,” etc. I’ve also worked hard to teach my boys to hold the door. Frankly, it is my five year old daughter who is most consistent in being the door holder, but that’s another story.

On one particular weekend night, we were leaving a restaurant. I noticed that there was a group of people behind us of about 10-12 people who were also leaving. Instinctively, I held the inside door. At the same time, my five year old boy and three year old girl (at the time) held the outside door without me saying anything. It was one of those moments as a parent where you feel just a little bit proud, but mostly just relieved because you feel like you finally did something right as a parent. Then, I noticed something else. I don’t know why this particular group of people was at the restaurant that night – perhaps a birthday party. They comprised a very diverse group of people from different races, males and females, and ages from probably around 10 to over 80. Out of the entire diverse group of people, not one took a second to thank either my kids or myself. I didn’t expect any gratitude for holding the door – I never do, but I was struck by the universal unwillingness to take just a moment to express any gratitude or offer a kind word.

Let’s review our definition of love from 1 Corinthians 13:

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. [1 Corinthians 13:4-8]

“Love is kind.” Of all the characteristics of love described in 1 Corinthians 13, the word “kind” by far has the most agreement between all the different translations of the Bible. Of the 87 translations I reviewed, a full 77 of them translated this portion of the chapter as “kind.” Three more had variations of the word kind or additional emphasis on the word kind (e.g., “is so kind”). Other translations included “cares more for others than for self,” “benign,” “gracious,” “courteous,” “gentle,” and “benevolent.” One last translation went more with a definition of what it is to be kind. The JBP version reads, “looks for a way of being constructive.” This is the essence of kindness. Kindness is the positive and proactive side of patience. Patience waits. Kindness actively seeks out opportunities to do good. Kindness doesn’t just hope and wish for the welfare of the one loved, kindness rolls up its sleeves and does something about it. “Love is kind,” along with “love is patient,” are the two terms in 1 Corinthians 13 which describe the conduct of love. They are not merely characteristics but actions.

God requires us to speak the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15). However, truth expressed without kindness is anything but loving. Previously, we’ve studied the idea that love is patient, but patience without kindness is not love. It hardly even qualifies as patience.

Kindness is many things. It is tenderhearted in its attitude. It is lending a helpful hand or a kind word at just the right moment. It is found in the tone of voice or an approving look or a smile. Kindness is active. It looks for ways to help. It searches earnestly for things to do – not always what we think should be done, but what the object of our kindness desires. Love acts in ways that are kind, gracious, useful and beneficial. Kindness demands that love is nice even on those days when it doesn’t feel like it – especially on those days when it doesn’t feel like it! Love is gentle even when it is roughed up. Kindness is compassionate towards others. Indeed, kindness will give anything to others – including our time.

There are also many things that kindness is not. It is not cynical or critical. It is not harsh. It does not snap back when provoked. It does not nag. It is not carrying around a chip on its shoulder. Kindness does not look for faults in others or point out their failures.

What Does the Bible Say

Like patience, the Bible has much to say about kindness. First, and perhaps most importantly, the Bible does not just suggest that we be kind, it commands it. The book of Proverbs says,

Do not withhold good from those who deserve it,
when it is in your power to act. (Proverbs 3:27)

It is not enough to not do things which are unkind. Love demands that we actively seek out kind things to do for other people. The preceding passage does not say, “you should do something nice for someone every once in a while.” Rather, it commands us that we should do good for others any time it is in our power to act. The Bible calls us to a life of exceptional acts of kindness! The importance of kindness is echoed in Proverbs 3:3,

Do not let kindness and truth leave you;
Bind them around your neck,
Write them on the tablet of your heart. [NASB] (Proverbs 3:3)

Kindness and truth are supposed to be “written on the tablet of our hearts.” They should motivate our actions and our thoughts. They should be foundational to our lives and guide our every thought and action. The Bible also provides insight into he results of our kindness.

Each of us should please his neighbor for his good, to build him up. (Romans 15:2)

Our kindness builds up the people in our lives and make them better people. If you’ve ever wondered how you can impact or effectuate change in another person’s life, try being kind to them and “kill them with kindness.” Pick up a cup of coffee for that lady at work who’s always scowling at you. Bring home flowers for your wife. Take your kids to the park and dote on them for a while. Let the guy who waits until the last second to merge in front of you and give him a smile and wave (use all your fingers when you wave please!). Proverbs tells us that on a very fundamental level, a well spoken kind word can make a person’s day!

An anxious heart weighs a man down,
but a kind word cheers him up. (Proverbs 12:25)

If this is not reason enough to strive for kindness, let us never forget that it is only through the kindness of God that we are saved and sanctified in Christ.

Or do you show contempt for the riches of his kindness, tolerance and patience, not realizing that God’s kindness leads you toward repentance? (Romans 2:4)

In fact, Christ is the personification of God’s kindness.

In order that in the coming ages he might show the incomparable riches of his grace, expressed in his kindness to us in Christ Jesus. (Ephesians 2:7)

Our salvation itself is a gift of God, and that through the kindness and love that was personified in Christ who came to die on the cross for our sins – not because we deserved it, but out of his loving kindness.

But when the kindness and love of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us generously through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that, having been justified by his grace, we might become heirs having the hope of eternal life. (Titus 3:4-7)

As this final verse points out, one earmark of our walk with Christ should be an ever increasing amount of kindness and love in our lives. Peter explains that lacking these characteristics will make us “ineffective and unproductive” in our work for Christ.

For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness, love. For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. But if anyone does not have them, he is nearsighted and blind, and has forgotten that he has been cleansed from his past sins. (2 Peter 1:5-8)

If you ever feel like your spiritual life has become stagnant; you would do well to examine the extent of your kindness towards others. We must never forget that God does not ask us to do things or exhibit characteristics which he himself does not do and exhibit. We love because he first loved us, and we should be kind because of the grace and kindness God had shown us. He demonstrates his grace and kindness to us in so many ways, but first and foremost by sending his son to die on the cross for our sins.

So now that we know what the Bible says about kindness, how do we apply the biblical concept of kindness to our spouses and our kids? It is these relationships which demand kindness the most but where it is often most difficult to display it. I believe God gives us a spouse and kids to test the limits of our patience and kindness so that we will realize that we must rely on him for patience and kindness in our own lives and to show us how to truly love others the way he loves us.

Kindness and Marriage

We should be kind to our spouses? What a novel concept! When you first started dating your spouse, you were no doubt kind to her/him. So, why does that change when we get married? All to often, as we become more and more comfortable and other things compete for our attention and time, we forget or ignore the little kind things we used to do. How sad it is that often times we show more kindness to perfect strangers than for the person whom God chose for us to spend our lives with.

So, what does kindness in our marriages look like? Kindness means showing appreciation for the big and little things. My wife is a wonderful mother and a wonderful cook. Every evening after dinner, I try to tell her how good it was and thank her for making dinner for the kids and me. However, if after expressing my gratitude and appreciation with words, I turn around and leave her with all the dishes and the kids while I run off to watch the game, I am being anything but kind. My wonderful wife also spends hours a day sometimes transporting our kids from one place to another. Although I appreciate what a wonderful mother she is, I realize that I don’t say so enough. A kind thought is nice, but if it is not expressed is does not have an object, and kindness without an object is dead. Put another way,

Better is open rebuke Than love that is concealed. (Proverbs 27:5).

So, kindness means acknowledging the little things that we appreciate and making a point to express that appreciation both in words and actions. It also means being sensitive to each others’ needs. Love is not selfish and it puts the needs of the object of that love ahead of our own needs. Since, “Love is kind,” kindness must do the same thing. In short, it means endeavoring to meet our spouse’s needs, especially when it is the last thing in the world that we feel like doing. It means watching the kids after a hard day’s work when you are completely drained because your wife has been dealing with them all day. It means allowing your husband to process his emotions rather than forcing him into a discussion he isn’t ready for. It means not taking your spouse for granted and expecting them to do something just because they always have. It means accepting your spouse the way they are rather than trying to transform them into your image for them. And, it means expressing your love in a manner your spouse understands rather than just assuming that they know that you love them and leaving it at that.

Afterall,

Better a dry crust with peace and quiet
than a house full of feasting, with strife. (Proverbs 17:1)

By the way guys, I wouldn’t suggest using this verse on your next anniversary card, but the truth is, kindness does lead to peace.

Kindness and kids

Last week, we had as look at the idea of patience and our kids, and kindness with our kids goes hand-in-hand with patience. It is difficult, if not impossible, to be actively kind with our kids when can’t even manage to be patient with them. So, how does kindness towards our kids show itself? First, and foremost, we are kind to our kids by serving them. We should seek opportunities to serve our kids – not out of a sense of obligation, but out of love. God has made us stewards over our kids here in this life, and they should be our ministry of first importance. One of the ways we minister to them (there are many) is to have and demonstrate the same kind of servant’s hearts with them as our Lord Jesus Christ has for all of us. The Lord commands us to serve one another, and he does not exclude kids from that command (I’ve looked – trust me!).

Kids learn from what they see, and our kids should see us modeling kindness both to them and to other people. Holding doors, serving the poor, biting our tongue and much more demonstrate kindness to our kids better than any lecture ever could. We do not show our kids kindness through yelling, harsh tones, biting sarcasm or punishment dished out in anger.

So, does kindness mean we should give in and give our kids everything they want? …let them get away with anything? Of course it doesn’t – far from it! The fact of the matter is that that kind of parenting (lazy parenting) is generally the least kind thing we could ever do for our kids. The Bible is clear that kids need correction, guidance and discipline. However, in administering these correctives, we should always remember that the Bible calls us to be a servant to all and that kindness (even in discipline) is much more likely than harshness to inspire good in our kids.

One way which we are often tempted to be “patient” with our kids is to simply ignore them. I have three brothers, so as the father of four boys, my Dad had perfected the art of tuning us out. As the father of four kids myself, I seem to have inherited that ability, and I’ve become quite adept at it myself. It doesn’t hurt that I am deaf in one ear. I have 50% less that I need to tune out.

Anyhow, while there are times as a parent when it is prudent to just let things go, a pattern of tuning our kids out rather than dealing with the issues at hand is anything but kind. Kindness demands action – not passive ignoring. Kindness and active love will serve to bring out the best in our kids rather than the worst.

Many times it is just hard to be kind to our kids. Maybe we lose sight of kindness because of the authority we are called to exercise over them. Maybe it is the stress which goes along with being a parent. Maybe it has to do with having to repeat yourself over and over and over and over again. Whatever it is, love demands kindness even in the face of persistent ingratitude – perhaps even more so in the face of persistent ingratitude. We love our kids through kindness, and we teach our kids how to love others by being kind to others.

Return to the Love That Surpasses All Knowledge (A Biblical Definition of Love) index page.

Related posts:

1. Hurry Up and Wait!
2. I Wish I Had Written That!
3. #23 – The Power of Open-Ended Questions (Tips For Large Group Teaching)

Originally posted September 24, 2008 on Facebook

“Patience with others is love. Patience with self is hope.
Patience with God is faith.” Adel Bestavros

“To put it in a nutshell, every sin is to be
traced back to impatience.” Tertullian (c. 160-225)

A man’s wisdom gives him patience;
it is to his glory to overlook an offense.
(Proverbs 19:11)

INTRODUCTION

Have you ever been sitting in traffic on the highway patiently (or not-so-patiently) waiting for traffic to start moving again so you can get off on your exit and get home to see your family? At that very moment, a small car cuts off everyone, weaves through lanes full of traffic, narrowly avoids your front bumper and cuts you off to get on the exit ramp. Who is that guy? Why does he think he’s more important than everyone else on the road? Wait just a second; is that a fish sticker on the trunk? I think we’ve probably all been there. In fact, if you drive that way, you’d probably be a better witness for Christ if you go outside right now and peel that little sticker off your car. Go ahead! We’ll wait for you. The root of the problem is a lack of patience, and a lack of patience is an indication of a lack of love.

Let’s go back real quick and remind ourselves of Paul’s description of the characteristics of love from 1 Corinthians 13:

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. [1 Corinthians 13:4-8]

Love is patient! It is the very first characteristic of love included in the description in 1 Corinthians 13. Other translations render this variously as love is long-suffering, does not give up, endures long, never tires of waiting, forbears and waits patiently. All of these translations indicate the basic characteristic that Love does not insist on immediate gratification.

In a society bent on instant gratification, the concept of patience is often missed or downright ignored. We have fast food, immediate access to a world of information on the internet, 24 hour access to anyone with a pager or cell phone. You can even download your favorite songs with the touch of a button. Heck, you don’t even have to wait until you have cash to pay for it. Type in the 16 numbers from that piece of plastic in your wallet or purse, and you can have whatever you want, and you can have it RIGHT NOW!!! Advertisers exploit this societal impatience and pander to this need for instant gratification. The idea of patience is not popular today in a society fixated on our individual rights. We want and expect people to do exactly what we want them to do, and we expect them to do it NOW! All too often, in this society we sacrifice the permanent on the alter of the immediate.

Love, on the other hand, is patient. In the original Greek of the New Testament, this word means long-tempered and indicates patience with people. We will look at patience with our circumstances later in this verse where Paul talks about endurance, but the focus of this portion of our study will be on patience with people.

The objects of our love in this world are, by definition, imperfect, unlovely and fallen human beings. Let us not forget though, that the people who love us also love imperfect, unlovely people. Like God, who loves us despite the fact that we are unlovely, true biblical love demands that we do the same for other people. You see, the problem with unlovely people is that they don’t always do what we want, and even when they do, they don’t always do it on our time table or the same way we would have done it. As such, patient becomes a critical component of love. Perhaps this is why Paul listed it first in the characteristics of love.

So, what is patience? I’ve read that patience is the behavioral way of saying, “I love you!” It is one of only two ways that the Bible describes the conduct of love. So what does it mean? What is patience? Patience means bearing with one another’s weaknesses. It means bearing with those who wrong us, offend us, criticize us, nag us and those people we just can’t stand. It means being slow to take offense and resisting the urge to be resentful or become bitter. It means being tolerant towards others and accepting of them even when they displease us. It means having a long fuse and not retaliating. It means not whining when things aren’t going as fast as we would like them to (even if it’s the guy with the fish sticker in the car in front of us that just cut us off). It means allowing yourself to be inconvenienced or taken advantage of over and over. Sometimes, it might even mean being a door mat and allowing yourself to be walked all over. It also means being patient with those people who are not patient with us.

Love waits patiently. It is not sarcastic. It does not engage in self-pity when things don’t go its way. It endures evil, injury and provocation without being filled with resentment, indignation or revenge. It endures slights and neglects without lashing out. It never has a vengeful response to being wronged. It suffers heartache and continues to work for the good of the one loved. Patience is not just waiting; it’s waiting with a good attitude.

I think this last point warrants some further discussion. Patience is an action, but it is also the attitude with which that action is taken. I go to the mall sometimes with my wife when she is shopping for clothes. Well….I used to. She doesn’t let me go so much any more. I always thought that I was waiting patiently for her to finish looking at those 437 outfits, picking up four, putting back three, picking up another one, putting both away, and so on and so on and so on. As it turns out, according to my wife, my attitude was anything but patient. According to her, while I thought I was standing there patiently, my body language, eyes, and maybe the occasional comment all made it clear that I was ready to go. The fact of the matter is, loving patience includes not just what we do, but the attitude behind it.

Love would rather wait patiently for the loved one to be reformed than to react. One of the greatest tests of true love is patience. For those of you who are married, you know that patience is critical to the success of your marriage – both your patience with your spouse and your spouse’s patience with you. We will discuss this further in the section on patience in marriage below.

WHAT DOES THE BIBLE SAY ABOUT PATIENCE?

Patience involves perseverance and endurance. Biblical patience is not a desperate waiting in doubt, but a hopeful waiting in confidence based on our faith in God. Biblical patience is active. It is not abstract or passive. Love does not simply feel patient, it is patient and practices patience.

Proverbs tell us that patience and controlling one’s temper go hand-in-hand:

A hot-tempered man stirs up dissension,
but a patient man calms a quarrel. (Proverbs 15:18)

Better a patient man than a warrior,
a man who controls his temper than one who takes a city. (Proverbs 16:32)

It is so much easier to loose our temper when faced with a difficult person than to be patient. Love, however, always calls us to be patient. Proverbs also gives us some insight into the source of this patience which is a characteristic of love:

A patient man has great understanding,
but a quick-tempered man displays folly. (Proverbs 14:29)

The Bible makes it clear that patience comes from wisdom. It is not something you either have or don’t have, it comes with wisdom. This is both good news and bad news. It’s good news for those of us who suffer from a lack of patience because there is hope that we can learn it. The bad news is that patience does takes work. Like love itself, patience does not come naturally but must be cultivated in our lives. So, what kind of wisdom is the Bible talking about that leads to patience? Galatians 5:22 tells us that patience is one of the fruits of the Spirit. The wisdom that leads to patience is the wisdom of God. The wisdom of God is revealed in his word. How patient has God been with his people? How many times did Israel turn from God during the journey from Egypt? How patient has God been with you? I know in my case, God was patient with me for over 30 years before I finally admitted my need for him. How then, can I justify not being patient with my wife or kids or my boss when they get on my nerves? Patience comes directly from our submission to God.

The Lord is the source of our patience.

Bear in mind that our Lord’s patience means salvation, just as our dear brother Paul also wrote you with the wisdom that God gave him. (2 Peter 3:15)

God is patient with his people. He lovingly respects our will when he could compel us to do whatever he wants. We get our ability to be patient from God because we were made in his image, and he gives us the peace we need to wait patiently in any circumstance. We are called to keep expressing God’s patient love no matter what the circumstances.

Our very life and continued existence, our salvation, and our hope are all born out of God’s patience.

What if God, choosing to show his wrath and make his power known, bore with great patience the objects of his wrath—prepared for destruction? (Romans 9:22)

And, we are told to be patient,

For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what he already has? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently. (Romans 8:24-25)

So, if God calls us to be patient, let’s take a minute and look at the other side of the coin. What causes impatience? The Bible gives us some insight into that as well:

The end of a matter is better than its beginning,
and patience is better than pride. (Ecclesiastes 7:8)

This verse let’s us in on the dirty little secret of impatience. Impatience is born out of pride. We will see as we work through these characteristics of love that, not only does Paul explicitly tell us that love isn’t proud, but pride is actually the antithesis of love. When we are impatient with someone, if we look deep down, I think we will find that pride is at the root of the issue. How dare someone make me wait? I am more important than that! I can’t believe they want to do it that way. My idea was so much better, I can’t believe my son wants to dress that way, what will people think of me as a parent? I can’t believe my wife said that, I shouldn’t have to put up with that! All of these examples of impatience are driven by pride – I’m more important, I’m smarter, I’m embarrassed, I’ve been insulted. It all comes down to me…me…me!

The Bible commands us to exhibit patience consistent with the calling we have received as Christians. Ephesians 4:1-6 tells us:

As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace. There is one body and one Spirit—just as you were called to one hope when you were called— one Lord, one faith, one baptism; one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all. (Ephesians 4:1-6)

As Christians, we have the highest calling that there is. Here Paul tells us that part of leading a life worthy of that calling is being patient – bearing with one another in love. Paul also provides some advice on how to show that patience to others – humility, gentleness, and peace. All of these are bedfellows of love. Indeed, patience is listed in several of the scriptural honor rolls of admirable characteristics (see for example, 2 Corinthians 6:3-10; Galatians 5:22; and Colossians 3:12-14).

So, now that we’ve looked at how to be patience, where our patience comes from and why we should be patient, there is only one question remaining. Who should we be patient with? Here the Bible leaves no doubt. We are to be patient with everyone.

And we urge you, brothers, warn those who are idle, encourage the timid, help the weak, be patient with everyone. (1 Thessalonians 5:14)

It’s so easy to be patient with people who don’t bother us. That’s a lot like Jesus’ admonition against only loving those who love us. Indeed, with love, God calls us to be patient with those who bother us the most. Unfortunately, many times those people who annoy us the most live under the same roof – which is the perfect transition into the next section of this study.

PATIENCE AND MARRIAGE

We are all fallen human beings, and we all have our own set of quirks and idiosyncrasies. Frankly, in many cases, those terms are probably too kind. In my case, I never realized just how many idiosyncrasies I really did have until I got married and my wife began to point them out to me.

• I don’t like feet.
• I don’t like the feel of lotion on my hands.
• I have to have the remote in my hand when I’m watching TV (maybe this is less idiosyncrasy and more being male, but no matter).
• I eat my food in a particular way (all of each side dish in succession then the main dish – in case you’re wondering).
• I fidget when I sit.
• I bounce my knee when I’m sitting at the table.
• I write things on my to do lists that I’ve already done just for the pleasure of crossing them out.

…and that’s probably just the start of the list. Anyhow, before I got married, I didn’t even realize I had these idiosyncrasies. And, these are just my quirks, it doesn’t even include my annoying habits, and I’ve got plenty of those too!

I spoke earlier about some of my own idiosyncrasies that I “discovered” after I was married. The fact of the matter is that my wife also has some habits that get under my skin. I won’t list them here as I imagine she might read this some day. Regardless, one of the things I’ve learned, although I don’t always practice it the way I should, is that one of the keys to lessen marital strife is to never view your spouses idiosyncrasies as more annoying than your own.

When we get married, we marry fallen, imperfect human beings. So do our spouses! There are bound to be those things we would have done differently, those things which never get done, and a whole multitude of things which just get under our skin. When you spend so much time with the same person, when you share with one another your most intimate thoughts and secrets, you will invariably get some bad along with all the good. The fact of the matter is that relationships take time, and time takes patience.

Jesus’ warning about judging your brothers is particularly relevant in the marriage relationship:

“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Brother, let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when you yourself fail to see the plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye. (Luke 6:41-42)

I’ve heard it said that a happy marriage is one where both spouses feel like they got the better end of the bargain.

In our world today which has coined phrases such as “starter marriage” and “no-fault divorce,” the ideas of patience in marriage and sticking with it have become cliché. The idea of suffering, long-suffering, has given way to the myth of deserving to be happy. Think about the phrase “life’s too short.” We neglect the fact the our happiness (true happiness) comes only from God:

Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. (James 1:17)

The fact of the matter is, our lack of patience is not actually with people, it is with God. When we do not show patience, we are in essence telling God that he is not working on our schedule, and he should snap to it! In our marriages, and in all of our relationships, we must be willing to patiently wait on the Lord in trying circumstances:

Wait for the LORD;
be strong and take heart
and wait for the LORD. (Psalm 27:14)

Patience, like love, is always a lot easier when things are going well. When we get into crisis mode, we are more likely to want what we want, and want it now. We become less willing to wait upon the Lord. When we are asking God to take things in our life from good to better, or even not-so-good to good, it is easier to take things in stride and wait God out. When you’re at the end of your rope and struggling to tread water, gasping for every breath, it takes a lot more strength to show patience.

I know from my personal experience with crisis that the hardest thing was just waiting. I had faith in the Lord that he would help me weather the storm, but things just never seemed to move quickly enough. For every step forward, it seemed like there were two steps back. I had no patience of my own accord. My patience and my strength came only from the Lord and my reliance on his promises and his faithfulness.

PATIENCE AND KIDS

Perhaps one of the hardest roles for maintaining our patience is in the role of parent. I know that personally I follow a well defined cycle of resolving within myself to be more patient with my kids, trying to keep hold of my temper, losing my temper with my kids, realizing I need to be more patient, repenting, resolving to be more patient, trying to keep hold of my temper, losing my temper with my kids, and so on and so on. Many times, our impatience with our kids is a direct result of our pride. We expect our kids to show us respect, and kids should respect their parents. The problem is we just expect them to do it because that’s what kids do, and we view it as a betrayal when they do not. We do not show patience to our kids then wonder why they are so impatient themselves.

Kids, by their very nature, are impatient beings. We all are, but kids have not yet learned the societal importance of not giving in constantly to their impatience. A colleague at work came in one morning and shared a story about his three year old little girl. They had been having problems with her walking up while they were in the middle of a conversation and rudely interrupting. So, they took her aside and told her that if she needed to talk to a grown up who was having a conversation with someone else, she should walk up and say “Excuse me.” At this point in the story, as the parent of three kids at the time, I knew exactly where this story was going. I imagine any parents out there who have gone through the three year old years also know how this story is going to end. The next night, this colleague of mine was outside with his daughter and was talking to a neighbor. His daughter needed to get his attention. So, as instructed, she walked up, tugged on his pant leg, and with machine gun speed said “’Scuse me! ‘Scuse me! ‘Scuse me! ‘Scuse me! ‘Scuse me! ‘Scuse me! ‘Scuse me! ‘Scuse me! ‘Scuse me! ‘Scuse me! ‘Scuse me!” over and over again.

There is no denying that kids are impatient. Our job, as parents, in order to “raise them up in the way they should go,” is to teach them the importance of patience. Unfortunately for many of us, kids do not learn this by the words we say, but by watching how we react to trying circumstances. When our kids get on our nerves, and they do no matter how much we love them, it is important that we react with patience and love. I was listening to a pastor on the radio one morning who was recounting the words he had heard early in his ministry from a mentor, “I would rather see a sermon than hear one.” We would be wise to remember those words when it comes to dealing with our kids.

So, what does it mean to be patient with our kids? What does it look like? And, why is it so hard to do? Patience with our kids can take many forms. It might mean not cutting them off in conversation. It might mean accepting that our kids, and their dreams, may be very different than we are. Patience with our kids might mean giving them enough space to make their own mistakes. Patience means allowing our kids to express themselves even when we disagree with them. Patience means having the same conversation over and over and over again. Patience is waiting for discipline to work rather than constantly looking for the easy way out. Patience is watching our kids suffer (one of the hardest things for parents to do) when we know that that suffering will help them to grow in the long run.

When I was a kid, my Dad used to tell us that he felt like a broken record. I never understood what he meant by that phrase until I had kids of my own. Patience with our kids means answering the same question and giving the same instructions hundreds, if not thousands, of times. When my nephew was three or four, he used to ask “why?” to everything. Now, there is nothing unusual or unique about that. Most kids go through the “why” phase. The fun thing about my nephew was that after going through a series of 10-20 “why” questions which my brother would patiently answer, my nephew would always end by asking my brother “How do you know?” It drove my brother up the wall. Kids have idiosyncrasies as well! (As an aside, as an Uncle and someone who grew up in the same house as my nephews Dad, I found it absolutely hilarious ).

Often times, being patient with our kids means prioritizing issues and letting the smaller ones slide. In the secular world, there is a common adage that says you have to “pick your battles” with your kids. I don’t care for the terminology because it reduces the parent/child relationship to terms of warfare, and Christian love calls us to walk beside our kids and build them up. That said, it is important for us to distinguish between biblical correction and those areas that are of less importance. After all, the Bible tells us:

Train a child in the way he should go,
and when he is old he will not turn from it. (Proverbs 22:6)

and;

He who spares the rod hates his son,
but he who loves him is careful to discipline him. (Proverbs 13:24)

Clearly, the Bible instructs us to discipline our kids in order to bring them up in the way of the Lord. Proverbs 13:24 even says that love requires discipline. Our goal should be to discipline in a way consistent with God’s discipline:

My son, do not despise the LORD’s discipline
and do not resent his rebuke,
because the LORD disciplines those he loves,
as a father the son he delights in. (Proverbs 3:11-12)

The writer of Hebrews quotes this verse then further explains:

Our fathers disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it. (Hebrews 12:10-11)

So, discipline is an expression of love. That’s all fine and dandy, but what does any of that have to do with patience? Let me see if I can make the link. Otherwise, I’m going to have to go back and rewrite this whole section. Paul writes to the Ephesians:

Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. (Ephesians 6:4)

And to the Colossians:

Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged. (Colossians 3:21)

This is where patience is critical. In disciplining our kids, it is critical that we approach it with love and patience. When we lose our patience with our kids, we risk saying things we don’t mean, dishing out overly harsh punishments, and having to go back to our kids later to apologize for our attitude. We should never punish our kids out of frustration, especially frustration born out a lack of patience. Rather, all discipline should be for the benefit of the child to “raise him up in the way he should go.”

Many times when we are impatient with our kids, it is because we have trouble forgiving them. Imagine that – the concept of forgiving our kids. The Bible says:

Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. (Colossians 3:13)

Why then do we sometimes find it so hard to forgive our own kids? My wife is a lot better at it than me. Each morning, she finds some way to give the kids a completely clean slate. No matter how disrespectful, disobedient, mouthy, mean or nasty they may have been the previous day, she starts fresh with them virtually every day. I, on the other hand, have trouble letting go. I have trouble forgiving. No matter how many times I profess it with my mouth, in my heart, I have trouble with forgiveness especially when it comes to dealing with same issues over and over and over again. I’ll talk more about it later in the section on keeping no record of wrongs, but a lack of ability to forgive leads to impatience. When we don’t forgive, we start to get bitter, and patience is particularly hard in the face of bitterness.

So, I was sitting in church one morning knowing that I was going to write this section of the study on patience that afternoon and wondering how I was going to write intelligibly about something that I fail at so frequently and so completely. I often tell people, “I used to be a patient person, and then I had kids!” I was wondering how I was going to approach this section with any sense of authenticity when God, as he often does, pointed me back to the truth of his word. Let’s call it a God moment. The sermon had nothing to do with patience or parenting, but the pastor pointed to Romans 7 and 8 where Paul recounts his own struggles:

14 We know that the law is spiritual; but I am unspiritual, sold as a slave to sin. 15 I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. 16 And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. 17 As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. 18 I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. 19 For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. 20 Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.

21 So I find this law at work: When I want to do good, evil is right there with me. 22 For in my inner being I delight in God’s law; 23 but I see another law at work in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within my members. 24 What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? 25 Thanks be to God—through Jesus Christ our Lord!

1 Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, 2 because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death. 3 For what the law was powerless to do in that it was weakened by the sinful nature, God did by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful man to be a sin offering. And so he condemned sin in sinful man, 4 in order that the righteous requirements of the law might be fully met in us, who do not live according to the sinful nature but according to the Spirit.

12 Therefore, brothers, we have an obligation—but it is not to the sinful nature, to live according to it. 13 For if you live according to the sinful nature, you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live, (Romans 7:14-25; 8:1-4,12-13)

Over and over again, Paul resolved in his mind that he would no longer sin. It is clear though, that we can not conquer sin by our own will, but only by allowing the Holy Spirit to work in us. Only by the Spirit can we “put to death the misdeeds of the body.” Romans 8:16 tells us that the Spirit himself testifies with our spirit. The key then, I believe, to breaking the cycle of resolution and failure is to allow the Spirit of God to kill the selfishness, pride and sin that causes impatience. We must pray that God would give us patience with our kids. It is no coincidence then that:

The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. (Galatians 5:22-23)

Only by the sanctifying power of the Holy Spirit can we achieve these things. It is still a struggle for me, but like every struggle in our lives, it is comforting to know that we can lay it at the cross of Christ and that we do not face our struggles alone but in the sanctifying power of our Lord Jesus Christ.

When my oldest son was nine or so, we bought him a shirt while on vacation. In big bright multi-colored letters it read, “Be Patient, God isn’t done with me yet!” I always liked that shirt. In retrospect, I now see that I probably should have bought a matching shirt for myself!

Fortunately, the Bible provides some good examples of patience even under extreme heartache for us to emulate. Let’s take a look at a parable told by Jesus exemplifying parental patience. The parable is widely known as the Parable of the Prodigal Son, but it might be more aptly titled the Parable of the Patient Father. The story is told in Luke 15:11-31.

For all you fathers, try to imagine that your son, after years of raising and providing for him, come to you and says:

Father, give me my share of the estate. (Luke 15:11b)

You would have to be been stunned, or perhaps not. In essence, your youngest son is telling you, “the only use I have for you is your money. Do not make me wait until you die, give me my share now!” Can you imagine the heartache you feel? The fact of the matter is that love requires patience even under extreme heartache.

This is exactly the circumstances that the father in Jesus’ parable faced. So, did the father in this story yell and scream? Did he preach? Did he call his son ungrateful and remind him of all the things he had done for him? Let’s go back to Luke and see:

So he divided his property between them. (Luke 15:12b)

This father set aside the hurt, anger and disappointment that he must have felt and responded to his son in patience and love. The son then left home and squandered all of his money on “wild living.” After living destitute for a time, the son carefully plans his speech and heads back home. Luke tells us:

So he got up and went to his father. “But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him. (Luke 15:20)

Then, before the son could even finish the speech he had rehearsed, his father interrupted him and began to plan his welcome home party exclaiming:

For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found. (Luke 15:24a)

This is, of course, is a parable about God’s love and patience with us – his lost sons, but it serves as a classic biblical example of what patience with our kids ought to look like in practice. Patience, like love itself, can look past the hurt, shame and heartache to the needs of our children.

Many of us, me included, expect our kids to be little clones of ourselves, and it never works out that way. As we allow our children to grow into adults, as we train them in the ways of God, we must show our love to them through patience and work against our worldly desires to impose our will on them. After all, God never did that with us!

Return to the Love That Surpasses All Knowledge (A Biblical Definition of Love) index page.

Related posts:

1. The Power of Kindness
2. I Wish I Had Written That!
3. New Year's Resolutions

Originally posted September 18, 2008 on Facebook

God has many attributes which are revealed in scripture. Likewise, there are many attributes of God’s love. After all, God is love, and he has many attributes. We can not ignore one attribute to the benefit of another or stress one to the detriment of the other, but at his very nature, “God is Love.” Love is often cited as an attribute of God, but it is so much more than just that. I like the quote from the article Definitions of Doctrine:

“Without love His justice would cut us off; His holiness would put us out of His sight; and His power would destroy us.” Love is the one hope of sinners, and our great concern should be to discover God’s love to us. The love that bought us also sought us and brought us to the place of safety.”

When talking about the attributes of God’s love, I think it’s important to keep in mind some frame work of the type of love we are talking about. I like this summary from the article, “How Has God Loved Us?” which calls us to remember that:

“He is not only love. He loves according to the counsel of His wisdom, His goodness, and His eternality. His love is not blind, or indulgent, or shortsighted. His love is tough, it’s tender, it’s on His terms rather than ours, and it’s for the sake of His glory rather than our desires.” (De Haan, Martin R.. How Has God Loved Us? RBC Ministries. David Sper. 1994. 7/14/2006)

Let’s take a look at some of God’s attributes and see how those attributes are manifested and/or reflected in God’s love. The following is not intended to be a comprehensive listing of the attributes of God’s love, but it’s a good place to start.

1. Eternal

God’s love is eternal – a comment not only on the quantity or length of God’s love but also on the quality of it. God’s love is infinite in length and immeasurable in terms of quality.

God himself is infinite – a concept which is hard for us as human beings to get our head’s around. It’s best summarized in Revelation 1:8 where John records the words of God:

“I am the Alpha and the Omega,” says the Lord God, “who is, and who was, and who is to come, the Almighty.” (Revelation 1:8)

Because God is love, it follows that if God is infinite, his love must also be infinite. In the book of Romans, the Bible tell us that nothing can separate us from the love of our creator and savior. This is perhaps the strongest and clearest verse in the Bible on this subject.

35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? 36 As it is written: “For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.” 37 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38 For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39 neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Romans 8:35-39)

What a reassuring promise this is! Nothing in all of the universe or beyond can ever separate us from the eternal love of our almighty God. Nothing we can ever do will increase God’s love for us, and nothing we fail to do will ever decrease God’s love for us. Is it any wonder that our enemy, the devil, seems to spend most of his time either 1) trying to convince us that God really doesn’t love us at all, or 2) trying to cheapen God’s love by convincing us that God loves everybody and accepts them all no matter what they do.

In fighting these deceptions perpetrated by the evil one, we need only remember that God’s word is a double edged sword and find comfort in the truth of his word. So, what else does God tell us about his love? Psalm 103:17 tells us that God’s love is from “everlasting to everlasting.” The Lord himself tells Israel that his love is eternal:

The LORD appeared to us in the past, saying:
“I have loved you with an everlasting love;
I have drawn you with loving-kindness. (Jeremiah 31:3)

God loves us despite the fact that he knows everything there is to know about us. He invites us to continue to draw from his inexhaustible supply of love.

God’s love is infinitely better than anything we can even imagine in this world. It is not an emotional love that fades with time but an intelligent love which is eternal. It is unbounded, unlimited, unsearchable, immeasurable, incomparable, and incomprehensible.

Any attempt to explain the fullness and depth of God’s love is destined to fall far short. Indeed, trying to comprehend God’s love, it is critical that we imagine the greatest love possible then realize that God’s love is so far greater than that that we can not even fathom it. The Psalmist echoes the unfathomable nature of God’s love:

Great is the Lord and most worthy of praise;
His greatness no one can fathom. (Psalm 145:3)

Paul tells us that we will only truly understand it when perfection comes:

but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. (1 Corinthians 13:10,12b)

We are no more capable of seeing heaven than understanding the extent of God’s love for us.

11 For as high as the heavens are above the earth,
so great is his love for those who fear him;
12 as far as the east is from the west,
so far has he removed our transgressions from us. (Psalm 103:11-12)

2. Omnipresent

God is not bound by space, therefore he is everywhere. God, in his holiness is so far apart from us that the Bible tells us no one has ever seen God. However, he is also everywhere. He does not just sit in some celestial viewing room and watch as the events of this world unfold. He is everywhere, and his love is everywhere. There is no escaping from God’s love. David realized this when he prayed to God:

7 Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?
8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,
10 even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast. (Psalm 139:7-10)

There is no escaping from an omnipresent God. When we are hurt, his love is our bandage. When we are in despair, his love lifts us up. When we are lost, his love guides us. And when we were dead in our sins, his love gives us life. So, what does it all mean? How should we react to the truth that God and his love are everywhere? We should do what David did at the end of this Psalm and ask God:

23 Search me, O God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
24 See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting. (Psalm 139:23-24)

When it comes to love, we should pray for God’s guidance and then pray that he would give us the strength to follow the guidance.

There is an old song that goes “What the world needs now is love.” On the contrary, the world is full of love because God’s love permeates everything.

The earth is filled with your love, O LORD;
teach me your decrees. (Psalm 119:64)

What the world really needs is to tap into that real love, and the only way to do that is to get right with God.

While we are in the Psalms anyhow, there is a beautiful Psalm, written by David, which really captures the omnipresence of God and God’s love with some beautiful imagery.

5 Your love, O LORD, reaches to the heavens,
your faithfulness to the skies.
6 Your righteousness is like the mighty mountains,
your justice like the great deep.
O LORD, you preserve both man and beast.
7 How priceless is your unfailing love!
Both high and low among men
find refuge in the shadow of your wings.
8 They feast on the abundance of your house;
you give them drink from your river of delights.
9 For with you is the fountain of life;
in your light we see light. (Psalm 36:5-9)

God’s love reaches all the way to the heavens, and he faithfully displays that love to those who follow him. His holiness in his justice and his righteousness are compared to the greatest heights and depths known to man. We exist out of God’s great love and mercy. All men, no matter what their position in life or how successful they are in the view of the world, are equal under the comforting shadow of our loving God. God provides for our every need when we allow him to, and his light should guide us in our journey.

I think the key point is to be found in the middle of this passage. “How priceless is your unfailing love!” There is no treasure worth more, or more worth pursuing, than God’s love. We are reminded once again that God’s love does not change. It is immutable. It is unfailing. In our lives, people will come and go, careers will change, finances will ebb and flow. Loved ones will dies, and we, God willing, will grow old and wither ourselves. Seasons change, allegiances change, and feelings change. The one constant in our lives is our awesome God and his unfailing love. It should be the thread which binds together the fabric of our lives.

3. Immutable (does not change, not diminished)

We’ve already touched a little bit on the immutability of God and his love. James reaffirms the providence of God we saw in Psalm 139:

Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. (James 1:17)

This truth, and applying it to our lives, will change the way we view everything in this world. Every good thing we have, or ever will have, has been given to us by our loving God out of his grace and mercy – not because we deserve it, but because he loves us. And, our loving God does not change his mind or shift his opinion “like shifting shadows” as people often do.

We see in both the Old and the New Testaments the confirmation that the Lord does not change.

“I the LORD do not change. So you, O descendants of Jacob, are not destroyed. (Malachi 3:6)

Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever. (Hebrews 13:8)

“Yesterday and today and forever,” the character of Christ has always been, and will always be, the same. The verse from Malachi reminds us that the immutability of God keeps us from destruction.

In a changing world, Jesus never changes. There is a lot of peace and comfort in that knowledge. We do not trust in a God who tells us one thing then does another. We do not hope in a God who promises one thing then delivers another. Our faith is placed firmly in a loving God who had a plan from the beginning and knew the ending before time ever existed.

God’s love is not fleeting, and he does not remove it from us. He may discipline us out of his love (indeed he promises to do that to those adopted as sons), but he will never take his love from us. In Psalm 89, God says of David,

I will not take my love from him, nor will I ever betray my faithfulness. (Psalm 89:33)

God created us for good works from the beginning of time, and it is his will that we fulfill them.

For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. (Ephesians 2:10)

God can make anything happen on his own, but in his love he gives us grace to accomplish the tasks he has laid before us.

Psalm 136 captures fully the immutable nature of God’s love. Psalm 136, in speaking of God, says 26 separate times that, “His love endures forever!” Each verse ends with this brilliant confirmation of God’s enduring love. This liturgy was likely recited by a Levitical song leader with the chorus answering each statement with the beautiful chorus, “His love endures forever!” In a wonderful model of praise, this Psalm first offers thanks, then recounts the awesome nature of God (in this case as it relates to creation), the deliverance of God (in the Exodus), the power of God (in conquest), the salvation of God (who remembers us), and the provision of God (who gives food to every creature).

4. Sacrificial

At its very core, God’s love is sacrificial, and the greatest expression of that love is also the most sacrificial action in human history:

9 This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. 10 This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. 11 Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. 12 No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us. (1 John 4:9-12)

The full extent of God’s love is demonstrated in the cross of Christ.

It was just before the Passover Feast. Jesus knew that the time had come for him to leave this world and go to the Father. Having loved his own who were in the world, he now showed them the full extent of his love. (John 13:1)

God made the biggest sacrifice in the history of humanity when he took on human form to die for our sins. He gave up majesty to be born in a manger. He came to earth to be shunned by his own creation. And, he was obedient to the father unto death:

And being found in appearance as a man,
he humbled himself
and became obedient to death—
even death on a cross! (Philippians 2:8)

The question remains, why? Was it really necessary for God to come to earth in human form to die on a cross and for our sins? And, if so, how should one react to that act of sacrificial love?

The simple truth is that we have all sinned.

for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23)

No matter how hard we try, we all sin both in acts of commission and omission. Because of the fall of man, we are all born with a sin nature, and nothing we can do in our own power changes that.

Furthermore, the Bible tells us that the consequence of sin is death

For the wages of sin is death, (Romans 6:23a)

That death takes a physical form, as in the only two things in life that are certain are death and taxes. More importantly than our physical death though, the death resulting from sin also includes a spiritual aspect. Our sin alienates of from the perfect, holy and righteous God who created us for all eternity. The entire old testament sacrificial system was a picture of the idea that the only payment for sin involves death.

Fortunately for us though, God through his grace and mercy provided a substitute to pay for our sins:

but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Romans 6:23b)

Salvation, and the eternal life that results, can not be earned.

For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by works, so that no one can boast. (Ephesians 2:8-9)

Salvation is a free gift from our gracious and loving God. Through his sacrificial love, God sent his son to take the penalty for all of our sins – past, present, and future. Jesus paid the price for our sins so that we don’t have too. God asks only that we acknowledge our sin and cry out to Jesus to be saved:

But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. (Romans 5:8)

That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved. (Romans 10:9-10)

It is not a sacrifice to give up that which costs us nothing. David provides a classic example of this sacrificial spirit. When plaque was besieging Jerusalem, and David went to the threshing floor of Araunah to offer a sacrifice to God.

22 Araunah said to David, “Let my lord the king take whatever pleases him and offer it up. Here are oxen for the burnt offering, and here are threshing sledges and ox yokes for the wood. 23 O king, Araunah gives all this to the king.” Araunah also said to him, “May the LORD your God accept you.”

24 But the king replied to Araunah, “No, I insist on paying you for it. I will not sacrifice to the LORD my God burnt offerings that cost me nothing.” (2 Samuel 24:22-24)

As discussed above, the ultimate expression of God’s sacrificial love is in the death of Christ on the cross in payment for our sins:

16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. 17 For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. 18 Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because he has not believed in the name of God’s one and only Son. (John 3:16-18)

5. Personal

God’s love is not just some distant and removed love. It is also a very personal love. When we accept Christ as Lord and savior, we are given the Holy Spirit who comes and lives inside of us. In theological terminology, we are indwelt by the Holy Spirit. How much more personal of a relationship could we have with God than to have him living inside of us?

I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. (Galatians 2:20)

When we are adopted into God’s family, we become co-heirs of the kingdom with Christ. Romans 8:15 tells us:

For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, “Abba, Father.” (Romans 8:15)

The closest English equivalent to the word “Abba” is “Daddy.” It is a term of personal intimacy. This is the same name used for God the Father by Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane:

“Abba, Father,” he said, “everything is possible for you. Take this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will.” (Mark 14:36)

We are also told this is the name the Holy Spirit uses for the father:

6 Because you are sons, God sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, the Spirit who calls out, “Abba, Father.” 7 So you are no longer a slave, but a son; and since you are a son, God has made you also an heir. (Galatians 4:6-7)

Abba was a very personal and loving term for father in Greek. As for our father, our Abba, God doesn’t require much of us. In the words of the prophet Micah:

He has showed you, O man, what is good.
And what does the LORD require of you?
To act justly and to love mercy
and to walk humbly with your God. (Micah 6:8)

We are to walk humbly with the Lord. Whenever I read this verse, it conjures up images for me of a four-year-old walking hand-in-hand with his or her Daddy and smiling ear-to-ear just to have this moment to spend time with him, comforted by the strong grip of his oversized hand, in awe of this giant man they call Daddy, and longing to grow up to be just like him. This is a picture of our intimate relationship with God.

So, the Bible tells us that our relationship with God is like that of a loving parent with their child. There are other verses in scripture where God compares his relationship to us to the relationship between a husband and a wife.

For your Maker is your husband—
the LORD Almighty is his name—
the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer;
he is called the God of all the earth. (Isaiah 54:5)

The idea of the marriage relationship, an institute created by God as a picture of his relationship with us, speaks to the intimacy and transparency of his relationship with us. Keep in mind that when God compares his relationship with us to a marriage, he is talking about his ideal marriage – marriage as he created to be before the fall of man. We should never let our image of God be distorted to conform to the mangled image of marriage in our culture today.

6. Relational

God’s is a relational being. Our God is a trinity, three persons in one God – Father, Son and Holy Spirit. It is because of this that God says, “let us make men in our image.” A discussion of the trinity is well beyond the scope of this study which is fortunate because it’s also beyond the realm of my understanding. But, the important point here is that God is relational, and he created man in his own image – so man is also relational. After God created Adam, he exclaimed “it is not good for man to be alone,” and he created woman. God decided even he was not enough for Adam. Humans require companionship with other humans. From the very beginning, God created us in his image to display his love which is relational.

God’s love does not exist in a vacuum. No love could so exist. Love requires an object, and for God that object is us. His love is not distant or removed; it is not merely spoken. God’s love is relational. God’s desire is that we share in the same type of perfect love that has existed since eternity past between Father, Son and Holy Spirit.

God’s love is shown through our relationships with others. God calls us into love relationships similar to the love relationship he has with us.

“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. (John 13:34) (MSG)

It is through these relationships that we grow towards complete unity.

20 “My prayer is not for them alone. I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message, 21 that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you. May they also be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me. 22 I have given them the glory that you gave me, that they may be one as we are one: 23 I in them and you in me. May they be brought to complete unity to let the world know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me. (John 17:20-23)

7. Perfect

We serve a perfect God. He does not make mistakes. He is perfectly holy, perfectly judging and perfectly loving. Everything God does is perfect. As the Psalmist wrote:

As for God, his way is perfect;
the word of the LORD is flawless.
He is a shield
for all who take refuge in him. (Psalm 18:30)

God’s love is perfect. Unfortunately for us, the truth of God’s perfect love is not always consistent with what we want in our lives. God’s love is perfect; it is not pampering. He is not interested in letting us do whatever we want. To do that would be the least loving thing he could do. No, God’s love is interested in perfecting us because he loves us. God sanctifies us. His ultimate goal is to make our love perfect like his, and being perfect isn’t about what we want. Only God knows how to love perfectly. As his creation, we have to accept that even those things which we feel are cruel, unfair, or unbearable are born ultimately out of God’s love. He calls us to love others like he loves us. He calls us to be perfect like him.

46 If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? 47 And if you greet only your brothers, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? 48 Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect. (Matthew 5:46-48)

God’s impossible calling is for us to be like him and to love like him. I’m reminded here of the lyrics of a song from one of my favorite Christian artists – Chris Rice. The song is “Love Like Crazy” and lyrics are:

I heard a rumor that love will make you crazy
Well is it true?
Well that’s no rumor, look at the crazy things that love made Jesus do
The friends he chose were thought to be outrageous
And you could even find him touching the contagious
And the craziest is how he chose to save us
He gave his life away
Then he had to go and say
“Gotta love the same way that I love you!”

Love like crazy
We gotta love like crazy
We gotta love like crazy
The way he loves you and me
‘Cause if the world’s ever gonna change
We gotta love like crazy

God does not call us to a standard of love beyond what he has already shown to us. Imagine what kind a change that kind “of crazy” love would bring to the world if we practiced it. So, God calls us to this ridiculously high standard (by human reasoning) knowing full well that we can never attain it.

We will look in significantly more detail later at what Paul had to say to the Christians in Corinthian, but Paul recognizes that we will never attain the perfect standard of God this side of heaven when he writes:

when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. (1 Corinthians 13:10)

Fortunately for us, God does not just set an impossible standard and leave us to have at it. Rather, once we turn our lives over to him, he begins to transform us from inside out, and he works with us to move us in the direction of fulfilling this lofty goal. He judges us based on our obedience in moving towards that goal and not on whether we achieve it. The truth of the matter is, God knows we will never achieve his standard. That is why Christ had to come and die on the cross for our sins.

8. Merciful/Supportive

God’s love is merciful and supportive. The Psalmist writes:

When I said, “My foot is slipping,”
your love, O LORD, supported me. (Psalm 94:18)

It is probably useful to pause for just a moment to define some terms. Grace is giving someone something they don’t deserve. Mercy is not giving someone what they do deserve. God’s love exhibits both characteristics of love and mercy. He is the God of love (2 Corinthians 13:11), the God of peace (Romans 15:33), and the God of all grace (1 Peter 5:10).

God’s grace is sufficient. When we turn to God in our weakness, he supplies our strength. The Lord is our strength and our refuge. Proverbs tells us:

The name of the LORD is a strong tower;
the righteous run to it and are safe. (Proverbs 18:10)

God’s love should be the foundation of our lives. In Matthew 7:24-27, Jesus tells the parable of the wise and foolish builders who built there houses on the foundations of rock (following the words of Jesus) and sand (no following the words of Jesus). The builder who built on the solid rock foundation weathered the storm, but the builder with the flimsy foundation saw his house destroyed. Likewise, our lives must be built on the solid foundation of God’s love. If we do that, we will not be swept away by the storms of this world. God, and his love, really is all we need.

The Psalmist tells us, in speaking of God,

My soul clings to you;
your right hand upholds me. (Psalm 63:8)

The power of Jesus holds the entire world together (Colossians 1:17). It is no surprise then that God’s love supports and sustains us.

9. Comforting

Our encouragement and strength come from God. Through his grace and mercy, God’s love comforts us.

16 May our Lord Jesus Christ himself and God our Father, who loved us and by his grace gave us eternal encouragement and good hope, 17 encourage your hearts and strengthen you in every good deed and word. (2 Thessalonians 2:16-17)

Jesus expressed God’s desire to comfort us in his lament over the city of Jerusalem.

“O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, you who kill the prophets and stone those sent to you, how often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, but you were not willing! (Luke 13:34)

These words, spoken to the Israelites, reveal how God’s wish is to comfort us and our natural tendency is to push him away.

Focusing on the reality of God’s love keeps us from seeking our security elsewhere. When we accept and comprehend the breadth of God’s love, we no longer look elsewhere for our comfort and security. In a world that seeks its comfort in jobs, investment accounts, houses, husbands, wives, friends, health, status and more, the reality of God’s love is revolutionary which leads nicely into our next section. Our strength comes from God. We will never be truly content until we realize that true contentment comes only from one source – Jesus Christ.

10. Life Changing

The reality of God, and God’s love, is an absolutely life changing reality. We were created by God in his image, and when we accept Christ as Lord and Savior, he begins to transform us from the inside out to return us back to his original image for humankind. The Bible tells us that:

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! (2 Corinthians 5:17)

and

22 You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; 23 to be made new in the attitude of your minds; 24 and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness. (Ephesians 4:22-24)

It is God’s love that created us a certain way, it is God’s love that saves us, and it is God’s, through his power, that turns our love upside down and begins the process of transforming us from the inside out to return us to the way we were originally created.

God’s love is better than life. It is because of, and through, God’s love that we are transformed. The change God’s love creates in us should lead us to a life of praise and service.

3 Because your love is better than life,
my lips will glorify you.
4 I will praise you as long as I live,
and in your name I will lift up my hands.
5 My soul will be satisfied as with the richest of foods;
with singing lips my mouth will praise you.
6 On my bed I remember you;
I think of you through the watches of the night.
7 Because you are my help,
I sing in the shadow of your wings. (Psalm 63:3-7)

True Christians are changed by God’s love. Their hope, their outlook, their feelings, their motivations, their relationships and their actions are all changed, and they are changed by God’s love.

11. Effectual

In Daniel 6, we read one of the most famous stories of the Old Testament – Daniel and the Lion’s Den.

Daniel worked for King Darius during his exile in Babylon. King Darius ruled over the Medo-Persian Empire which had displaced the Babylonian Empire. King Darius appointed 120 men to rule over his kingdom. These men reported to three other men (one of whom was Daniel) whose job was to see that the King’s interests were protected. When two of Daniel’s co-workers became jealous of him, they searched desperately for a way to discredit him before the King. Much to their chagrin, Daniel was above reproach so they hatched an underhanded and sinister plan. They used Daniel’s love and faithfulness to God, and King Darius’ pride, to concoct a plan to do away with Daniel. Knowing full well that Daniel would remain faithful to his God, the two wise men approached the King and played to his ego and pride. They convinced the King to issue an edict which forbid anyone in the kingdom from worshipping any God other than the King for a period of 30 days. When Daniel continued to pray to the one true God, he was arrested and sentenced to spend the night in the lions’ den. Under Medo-Persian law, the King could not reverse the edict he had previously issued, and the Bible tells us that the King was severely grieved the night Daniel had to spend in the lions’ den. Even though he loved Daniel, King Darius’ love was ineffectual. Despite being the King of the most powerful kingdom on Earth, there was nothing King Darius could do to save Daniel. The NIV reads:

When the king heard this, he was greatly distressed; he was determined to rescue Daniel and made every effort until sundown to save him. (Daniel 6:14)

God’s love, on the other hand, is effectual. As the creator and ruler of the entire universe, he has the power to do whatever his loves dictates. In Daniel’s case, God’s love muzzled the mouths of those lions and kept him safe. Where human love had failed Daniel, God’s love never fails.

We love our kids, but there are circumstances where we are powerless to help them. God’s love doesn’t have this problem. He loves us completely and he has the absolute power to do something about it.

12. Sovereign / Omniscient

When we, as Christians, accept Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior, God adopts us as his children. However, before we ever accepted Christ, God chose us.

4 For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love 5 he predestined us to be adopted as his sons through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will (Ephesians 1:4-5)

Before God created the world and started the hands of time, we were chosen to be part of his family.

All of creation was made by God and for God to bring glory to his name.

For by him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by him and for him. (Colossians 1:16)

God rules over everything. He is absolutely sovereign. It is because of his love that he rules over us by his benevolent monarchy.

For from him and through him and to him are all things.
To him be the glory forever! Amen. (Romans 11:36)

God chooses what to do based on his total and complete knowledge of us, and not based on what we want him to do. He loves us in spite of the fact that we are unlovely.

Therefore God has mercy on whom he wants to have mercy, and he hardens whom he wants to harden. (Romans 9:18)

It is arrogant of us to think that we could in any way influence our creator and the ruler of the whole earth.

But who are you, O man, to talk back to God? “Shall what is formed say to him who formed it, ‘Why did you make me like this?’ “ (Romans 9:20)

God alone chooses the object of his love. Take for example the case of Jacob and Esau in the Old Testament. In the following verses we see that God chose to put his love on Jacob and not on Esau.

2 “I have loved you,” says the LORD.
“But you ask, ‘How have you loved us?’
“Was not Esau Jacob’s brother?” the LORD says. “Yet I have loved Jacob, 3 but Esau I have hated, and I have turned his mountains into a wasteland and left his inheritance to the desert jackals.”
(Malachi 1:2-3)

Just as it is written: “Jacob I loved, but Esau I hated.” (Romans 9:13)

God has the choice, and he chose Israel in the Old Testament as the object of his love.

6 For you are a people holy to the LORD your God. The LORD your God has chosen you out of all the peoples on the face of the earth to be his people, his treasured possession. 7 The LORD did not set his affection on you and choose you because you were more numerous than other peoples, for you were the fewest of all peoples. 8 But it was because the LORD loved you and kept the oath he swore to your forefathers that he brought you out with a mighty hand and redeemed you from the land of slavery, from the power of Pharaoh king of Egypt. 9 Know therefore that the LORD your God is God; he is the faithful God, keeping his covenant of love to a thousand generations of those who love him and keep his commands. (Deuteronomy 7:6-9)

God did not choose Israel to be the children of God because he loved them. He loved them because he chose them. The fact of the matter is, God chooses who to love.

God loves us perfectly and completely regardless of how we perform or what we do. His love continues even when, and in spite of the fact that, we don’t respond to it. The Old Testament is replete with examples where the Israelites turned from God. The Israelites had not even crossed the Red Sea yet when they lost faith in God and complained to Moses;

Didn’t we say to you in Egypt, ‘Leave us alone; let us serve the Egyptians’? It would have been better for us to serve the Egyptians than to die in the desert!” (Exodus 14:12)

Over and over, Exodus recalls the Israelites’ grumblings against God, and God’s forgiveness of his chosen people. From manna to quail to water from the rock to the spies, we read about God’s choice to continue to love his people. The book of Judges, years after the Exodus, tells the cycle of the Israelites falling away from God and doing evil, only to have God save them by raising up a judge. 1 Samuel 8 tells us about how the Israelites insisted on having a King as a result of their lack of faith, and the Books of Kings and Chronicles tell of the wicked acts of the Israelite kings. Through it all, God continued with his ultimate plan for salvation. He loves us perfectly and completely regardless of how we perform.

God does not love us because we are worthy. On the contrary, our worth comes only through God’s love for us.

13. Holy / Righteous / Just / Pure

The holy nature of God’s love is one we would just as rather ignore if given the choice. The truth of the matter is that God’s love can never conflict with his holiness. God disciplines us to make us perfect as he is perfect. He does not discipline us because he is disgusted by us, even though our actions certainly warrant disgust. He disciplines us because he is holy, and in his love, he desires us to be holy like him.

God’s happiness is found in holiness. God’s love is not sloppy or soft or indulgent. God doesn’t just give us what we think we want and turn away. The holy nature of God’s love is underemphasized in today’s church. Many people think of God as a jeanie in a bottle – there to answer our every wish and command. However, a holy and true love must encourage holiness in its object. Our holiness is found in our obedience to God’s commands. Love and obedience are consistently grouped together in scripture. Here is a sampling of those verses:

Know therefore that the LORD your God is God; he is the faithful God, keeping his covenant of love to a thousand generations of those who love him and keep his commands. (Deuteronomy 7:9)

Love the LORD your God and keep his requirements, his decrees, his laws and his commands always. (Deuteronomy 11:1)

If you love me, you will obey what I command. (John 14:15)

Whoever has my commands and obeys them, he is the one who loves me. He who loves me will be loved by my Father, and I too will love him and show myself to him.” (John 14:21)

23 Jesus replied, “If anyone loves me, he will obey my teaching. My Father will love him, and we will come to him and make our home with him. 24 He who does not love me will not obey my teaching. These words you hear are not my own; they belong to the Father who sent me. (John 14:23-24)

And this is love: that we walk in obedience to his commands. As you have heard from the beginning, his command is that you walk in love. (2 John 1:6)

Other such verses include:

• Exodus 20:6
• Deuteronomy 5:9-10
• Deuteronomy 6:5-6
• Deuteronomy 7:12
• Deuteronomy 10:12-13
• Deuteronomy 11:13
• Deuteronomy 11:22
• Deuteronomy 30:6-8
• Deuteronomy 30:9-10
• Deuteronomy 30:16
• Joshua 22:5
• Psalm 119:47-48
• Nehemiah 1:5
• Daniel 9:4
• John 15:10
• 1 John 2:5
• 1 John 5:3

In the world today, it is much more fashionable to talk about a God who accepts any behavior because what loving God could condemn a person to hell? In reality, God is so pure, so perfect, so holy, that absent his love and grace, we could never even enter his presence. This seems like the appropriate time to talk about God’s unconditional love.

To say God’s love is unconditional is a bit of a misnomer. Based on the Bible, God’s love seems to have two separate expressions. God does love everyone, as in:

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. (John 3:16)

God does love everyone, but certain people are selected, and of their own free will, enter the kingdom of God. I do not pretend to understand the doctrine of predestination. To me, trying to understand how we can both have free will and be pre-destined is slightly harder than comprehending the concept of trinity (one god, three persons). A discussion is way beyond the scope of this study. Regardless, God’s love for the sovereignly chosen elect is unconditional. There is no doubt that, in God’s sovereign wisdom, those chosen to be children of God are treated differently than those who are not. So, God’s love cannot truly be said to be conditional. It is conditional upon our acceptance of him into our lives as Lord and Savior. God’s love is holy and because of his holiness he demands the same from us. Fortunately, through his great mercy, God has provided a way for us to be washed clean of our sins through the blood of Jesus Christ. Once we have accepted the gift of God’s salvation, he, in his love, begins the process of making us more like him.

In the world, there is a common expression that says, “Nobody’s perfect.” From a biblical perspective, there has only ever been one perfect human being, and that is our Lord Jesus Christ. Unfortunately, in this world, the mantra “Nobody’s perfect” has often become an excuse for not even trying. As Christians we must understand that, even though we will never be perfect, we must continue to strive for that goal.

Because by one sacrifice he has made perfect forever those who are being made holy. (Hebrews 10:14)

Only once we get to heaven and are perfect, made so by the cleansing blood of Christ, are we able to enter the presence of a perfect God.

Why is that? Why is the standard for getting into heaven set at the level of perfection?

Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect. (Matthew 5:48)

Imagine, if you will, a system where God allowed a little imperfection, just a little sin, into heaven. Let’s put the bar just below whatever you’ve done in your life. Everyone as good as you or better gets in, anyone who has done worse than you goes to hell. What’s the problem with such a system? Well, first, you could never know exactly where the bar was set until you die. Suppose the bar was set based on your neighbor’s life instead of your life, and he spent one more weekend helping a friend move than you did in your life? What a travesty it would be to get to the gates of heaven and find out this wasn’t your stop – you JUST missed it! If only you hadn’t cheated on that biology test in 8th grade! If only you had called your mother last weekend to wish her Happy Birthday instead of going to the game! If only you hadn’t cut that older woman off in traffic because you were late for work! Yes, in this system, you could never have any assurance of your salvation, but let’s get back to our hypothetical.

In this example, you know your ticket has been stamped “paradise” because your life sets the bar – you’re in! So, what’s the problem? The problem is, now there is imperfection in heaven, and the problems that beleaguered this world start to show up again in heaven. You’re a little bit proud, right? So pride finds its way into heaven and starts growing and multiplying like a weed. You’re a little bit self-centered, we all are, right? So, people in heaven start to look out for themselves and their loved ones, and others are left out in the cold, in heaven! God, who is holy, could not exist in such an imperfect heaven. He would be forced to create some new Heaven, a Heaven 2.0 if you will, to save us from the 1st heaven, and so on and so forth into perpetuity. Let us not forget, that God designed the world we live in now to be perfect. Turn on the news tonight and see how far we have fallen because a little sin found its way in.

We’ve all, in our own way, eaten the fruit of the forbidden tree. We’ve all, in numerous ways, chosen our own path over God’s. Why would we think that a heaven with a little sin would end up any differently than the world we’re living in today? It just makes sense that the standard for getting into heaven is perfection because perfection can not exist alongside imperfection. Fortunately, through God’s love and grace, we are made perfect by the blood of Christ.

This should be our sole desire in life – to follow the path of our creator and savior. This desire was aptly expressed by the Psalmist:

My steps have held to your paths; my feet have not slipped. (Psalm 17:5)

Oftentimes, the means God uses to perfect us is discipline. God’s discipline is an outgrowth of his love. We shouldn’t hope for God’s punishment, but we should relish it. And, we should learn from it when he is gracious enough to discipline us. It is in his love that God uses discipline to help us grow in our relationship with him.

5 And you have forgotten that word of encouragement that addresses you as sons:
“My son, do not make light of the Lord’s discipline,
and do not lose heart when he rebukes you,
6 because the Lord disciplines those he loves,
and he punishes everyone he accepts as a son.”
7 Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father? 8 If you are not disciplined (and everyone undergoes discipline), then you are illegitimate children and not true sons. 9 Moreover, we have all had human fathers who disciplined us and we respected them for it. How much more should we submit to the Father of our spirits and live! 10 Our fathers disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness. (Hebrews 12:5-10)

In today’s world where, “God is my best friend!” and “Jesus is my homeboy!” it is easy to overlook the holiness of God’s love. Let us never forget that it is the holiness of God’s love that works to perfect us and make our lives conform to the image of God.

So there we have it – 13 attributes of God which manifest themselves in his love. Perhaps the most important thing we need to remember about God’s love is the following:

For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Romans 8:38-39)

Return to the Love That Surpasses All Knowledge (A Biblical Definition of Love) index page.

Related posts:

1. The Flow of Love
2. What does love have to do with Marriage?
3. #27 – Love Them Like Jesus (Tips For Large Group Teaching)

Originally posted September 10, 2008 on Facebook

It has been written that “Love is an unconditional commitment to an imperfect person.” (Thoughts for Those in Troubled Marriages. Marriage Missions. Steve & Cindy Wright. 7/14/2006) Anyone who has ever tried to practice true biblical love can confirm the truth of that statement.

Before we jump right into an in depth study of the characteristics of love, I thought it might be worthwhile to step back and ask a more fundamental question. What causes love? Where does it come from? Let’s start by having a look at love in the context of its source and its flow.

In order to understand love, we must first understand the flow of love – where it comes from, how it starts, how it flows, and what we’re to do with it. Let’s begin with the fundamentals of what love is or more precisely, what God is.

STEP 1 – God is Love

The Bible tells us very clearly that God is love – not that God exhibits characteristics of love, not that God values love, but that God IS love.

And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him. (1 John 4:16)

It follows then, that God is the source of all love.

STEP 2 – God Loves Us

So, exactly how strong is God’s love for us? He loves us enough that he sent his one and only son into this world to die for our sins.

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because he has not believed in the name of God’s one and only Son. (John 3:16-18)

God didn’t come to die for our sins because we deserved it, but because he loves us.

God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. (Romans 5:8)

He loves us enough that he created us fully knowing that he would pay the ultimate price for our sins.

All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. (Psalm 139:16b)

Despite God’s complete foreknowledge of our rebellion, God elected to give up his heavenly throne, take on human flesh, and die for our transgressions so that we could spend eternity in his presence.

The fact of the matter is, if Jesus was who He claimed to be, then the cross demonstrates that it will take eternity just to understand how much God loves us. (De Haan, Martin R. How Has God Loved Us? RBC Ministries. David Sper. 1994. 7/14/2006)

God pours out his great love directly into our hearts by the Holy Spirit who lives inside all believers.

3 Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; 4 perseverance, character; and character, hope. 5 And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us. (Romans 5:3-5)

God will always act towards us in love because by his very nature, he can not do otherwise. However, God’s love is not mushy and superficial. It is a lifestyle of serious dedication and obedience to the will of God. Love starts with knowing and keeping God’s commands. The ultimate goal of love is perfecting the one loved, and God’s purpose in loving us is to perfect us. Perfecting us means transforming us from the inside out to be more and more like him. As we give God more and more control of our lives, he makes us more and more like Jesus. In his love, he works to perfect us and, thereby, to perfect our ability to love others as he loves us.

STEP 3 – We Love Because God First Loved Us

God’s love produces love in our own hearts. His love motivates us to love and sets the standard for our love. When it comes to love, God is the raw material. God is the factory. God is the distributor. And, God is the middleman. All we are is disposable containers in which God packages his love for distribution to the world.

God’s word is perfectly clear on why we love. We are only capable of giving love to others because he first loved us. 1 John 4:19 tells us, “We love because he first loved us.” Absent the love of God, we would not, and could not, love one another. As he is the source of our strength, our hope, and our salvation, he is the originator of love and the source of our ability to love. We were created to love when we were created in his image.

Furthermore, we are told that our ability to love is the ultimate measure of our relationship with God:

7 Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. 8 Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. (1 John 4:7-8)

Love is paramount to God, and he uses it as the measuring stick of our lives. We can not know God without that knowledge expressing itself in love – in love for God, and in love for others. The ability to love is another precious gift given to us by the grace of God. All of us should remember that we will be called to give an account of our life before God,

Nothing in all creation is hidden from God’s sight. Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of him to whom we must give account. (Hebrews 4:13)

Given that love is God’s measuring stick for our lives, and we will be called to account for all our actions (both loving and unloving), it is important to understand God’s idea and ideal of love.

STEP 4 – We Love God

Love is consistently defined in the Bible as obedience. Specifically, love for God is defined as willingness to follow God’s commands.

5 And now, dear lady, I am not writing you a new command but one we have had from the beginning. I ask that we love one another. 6 And this is love: that we walk in obedience to his commands. As you have heard from the beginning, his command is that you walk in love. (2 John 1:5-6)

Paul gives us some insight into how we should prepare ourselves in order to be able to love.

The goal of this command is love, which comes from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith. (1 Timothy 1:5)

Love springs from a pure heart, good conscience and sincere faith. All three of these manifest themselves in an obedience to God’s will.

So, how do we love God? How do we express that love? What seems like it should be a very complex and involved theological answer is actually very simple. We show our love for God by obeying his commands as reflected in scripture.

If you love me, you will obey what I command. (John 14:15)

This is love for God: to obey his commands. And his commands are not burdensome, (1 John 5:3)

John goes on to explain that everyone born of God overcomes the world and that those who overcome the world are those who believe that Jesus is the son of God. In other words, God’s commands are not burdensome because they all boil down to believing in, and following, Jesus Christ.

Jesus is our example of, and should be our mentor in, loving obedience. If ever we wonder about the need to be obedient to God, we need look no further than Jesus, God himself incarnate, for guidance:

9 “As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love. 10 If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father’s commands and remain in his love. 11 I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete. 12 My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. (John 15:9-12)

We are commanded to walk as Jesus did. Only in doing this will God’s love be perfected in our lives.

4 The man who says, “I know him,” but does not do what he commands is a liar, and the truth is not in him. 5 But if anyone obeys his word, God’s love is truly made complete in him. This is how we know we are in him: 6 Whoever claims to live in him must walk as Jesus did. (1 John 2:4-6)

The key then to loving God is obedience. Perhaps this is why we find it so difficult to learn how to love God and to maintain that love. The fact is even once we learn to love God, we must be careful not to let that love for God go untended. A love for God that is not nurtured can be easily lost. This was true for the whole church in Ephesus. In the Book of Revelation, Jesus commands John to write,

1 “To the angel of the church in Ephesus write:
These are the words of him who holds the seven stars in his right hand and walks among the seven golden lamp stands: 2 I know your deeds, your hard work and your perseverance. I know that you cannot tolerate wicked men, that you have tested those who claim to be apostles but are not, and have found them false. 3 You have persevered and have endured hardships for my name, and have not grown weary. 4 Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken your first love. 5 Remember the height from which you have fallen! Repent and do the things you did at first. If you do not repent, I will come to you and remove your lamp stand from its place (Revelation 2:1-5)

When we lose our focus on God, we run the risk of losing our love for him.

Because of the increase of wickedness, the love of most will grow cold, (Matthew 24:12)

Our love for God, so strong at the moment of salvation, can grow cold. Jesus alludes to this as well in the Parable of the Sower in which he makes reference to two groups of people whose love for God grows cold. The first group receives the good news with joy but quickly falls away when persecution comes. The second group hears the word, but the worries of this world choke it out. Like any good relationship, we must nurture and express our love for God in order to strengthen it. Love is never stagnant! It is always either expanding or retracting, and our love for God is no different.

STEP 5 – We Love Others

God does not just desire that we love, he commands it! The command to love in scripture is not veiled or hard to pick up. God could not have been more direct in his command to love:

This is my command: Love each other. (John 15:17)

My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. (John 15:12)

Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves. (Romans 12:10)

Love is at the core of God’s plan for humanity because relationship is at the center of his plan. Let’s look at just a handful of the verses where we are commanded to love in both the Old Testament and the New Testament.

God’s command to love shows up early in the Old Testament in the Levitical Law given through Moses.

“‘Do not seek revenge or bear a grudge against one of your people, but love your neighbor as yourself. I am the LORD. (Leviticus 19:18)

Very early on, God tells his people to love. Based on his authority – “I am the LORD” he commands the Israelites to love their neighbors as they love themselves. In this one simple verse, quoted by Jesus himself, the Lord introduces the concept of forgiveness (“do not seek revenge or bear a grudge”) and sacrifice (“as yourself”) as foundational to the command to love.

3 Let love and faithfulness never leave you;
bind them around your neck,
write them on the tablet of your heart.
4 Then you will win favor and a good name
in the sight of God and man. (Proverbs 3:3-4)

God commands us not just to love, but to bind love around our necks. This imagery conjures up the notion of being led by the leash of love. We are told to write love on our hearts. It is to be the very core of our being. This verse indicates that we control the decision to love. We are not a victim of love.

This verse also introduces us to the idea that love is the basis by which we are gauged in our lives. When we make love foundational in our lives, we win favor in the sight of man, and more importantly, in the sight of God.

So, like the religious leader who asked Jesus who his neighbor was, the fact that God commands that love be the foundation of our lives begs the question, who are we supposed to love?

God does not simply ask us to love those who are members of our family or those people we enjoy being with, he commands us to love those who hate us and those who persecute us.

27 “But I tell you who hear me: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, 28 bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. 29 If someone strikes you on one cheek, turn to him the other also. If someone takes your cloak, do not stop him from taking your tunic. 30 Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. 31 Do to others as you would have them do to you. 32 “If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even ‘sinners’ love those who love them. (Luke 6:27-32)

It is impossible to love God and to hate people at the same time.

20 If anyone says, “I love God,” yet hates his brother, he is a liar. For anyone who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen. 21 And he has given us this command: Whoever loves God must also love his brother. (1 John 4:20-21)

This command to love those who hate us is hard. Indeed, it is an impossible task and a standard which we are not capable of meeting on our own. Fortunately for us, God does not ask as to go at it alone. He calls us to this impossibly high standard, then he works within us to help us try to attain to this standard.

God created us in his image. One off-shoot of that is that he created us to be in loving relationships, not just with him, but also with other people. Indeed, the only way to find true joy and fulfillment is by sacrificially loving others.

In our next installment, we will look at some of the attributes of God’s love then move on to our detailed study of the definition of love in 1 Corinthians 13.

Return to the Love That Surpasses All Knowledge (A Biblical Definition of Love) index page.

Related posts:

1. #27 – Love Them Like Jesus (Tips For Large Group Teaching)
2. A Love That Surpasses All Knowledge
3. What does love have to do with Marriage?

Originally posted September 3, 2008 on Facebook

There is a verse in the Bible that virtually everyone knows – if not verbatim, at least they would recognize it when they heard it. Next to John 3:16, it is perhaps the best known verse in the Bible. It reads as follows:

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres. Love never fails. [1 Corinthians 13:4-8]

It is read at weddings every day in this country. It was read at my wedding almost nine years ago despite the fact that, at the time, I had no relationship with my Lord and Savior. Perhaps there is too much familiarity with the verse. So much so that sometimes we don’t take the time to step back and think about the truth and importance of that verse. That’s what I hope to do in this posting and future postings. I want to take some time to look at each characteristic of love reflected in this verse and understand the importance and application of each.

So, what exactly prompted this article on love? In many ways, I started this study as part of my own spiritual walk, but as I studied the concept of love, it was apparent that there were wider implications. The fact is that we live in a culture infatuated with the concept of love. We seek it. We read about it. We watch it on the big screen. We read magazines to tell us how to make that special someone love us. We buy things to try to make people love us, and when that doesn’t fulfill us, we buy things to numb the pain. Our world is starved for love. The theme of love is pervasive in music, poetry, books, movies, television, and magazines. In researching the world’s view of love, I came across the following quote which really sums it up: “Love is a popular subject today. Never before in history have we heard so much about it yet seen so little of it in action.” (Strauss, Richard L. Marriage Is for Love. Bible.Org. Biblical Studies Foundation. 7/11/2006)

Unfortunately, the idea of love that the world views as paramount is exactly the opposite of true love as described in the Bible. The world’s love is selfish. It is a love which says, “I love you because of how you make me feel, because of what you can do for me, because of how other people look at me when I am with you.” In the world, being loved is more important than loving. The world’s view of love is materialistic. We were designed to love people and use things, but we live in a world where we love things and use people. The world confuses love with infatuation. In the world, love is something fleeting. It can be “fallen into” and just as easily “fallen out of.” In the view of the world, we have no control whatsoever over when we love, whom we love, or how we love. In this world, love is just a feeling that comes and goes. It does not require effort or wisdom. We are essentially victims of love. “Love is blind” says the world. On the contrary, “…love cannot be blind. Infatuation may be blind; physical desire may be blind, but love is the only real vision there is.” (Thoughts Concerning Marriage Matters. Marriage Missions. Steve & Cindy Wright. 7/14/2006)

It really comes as no surprise that as a culture we long for love. After all, that’s the way God made us. After all, we are made in the image of God and “God is Love” [1 John 4:8 and 1 John 4:16]. We were made by God to love and to be loved. Unfortunately, the love that the world seeks after and offers is a cheap imitation of God’s love. This cheap imitation of love which our culture has bought into lock, stock and barrel is a love that never allows a person to find real happiness or fulfillment.

Let’s step back for just a second and see how the culture’s view of love has cheapened even the word itself. One of the fundamental problems with the world’s definition of love is that the word itself has come to mean so many different things to different people. This proliferation in meanings has rendered the word “love” essentially meaningless. It can mean a feeling that won’t last (“I loooove you”), a euphemism for sex (“make love”), a preference (“I love ice cream!”), and so much more. In the same breath I can tell my wife I love her and explain how much I love lasagna. If you want to have some fun one day, go around your town and ask 25 random people to define the word love. Sit back and watch them struggle. The term has become so nebulous in our society that it is virtually indefinable. How many kids have asked their parents what love is only to receive the tragic and totally useless answer, “you’ll know it when you find it?” The problem is that when a word is as vague as the word “love” has become in our culture today, and when it has such a multitude of different uses and meanings, it just becomes a meaningless and useless word. What a tragedy that this concept that is the essence of God has become a meaningless term in the world today!

We were designed by God to live in loving relationship with each other and with God, and Satan has used our built in desire for that love to pervert the meaning of the word and convince the world that love is something completely opposite of that which God designed it to be. As we embark on this study of what real biblical love is, it is critical that we remember that God’s definition of love is exactly the opposite of the world’s definition. It is my sincere hope that, by studying the characteristics of love from 1 Corinthians, that we will be freer to love others, and to love God, the way he intended us to, and by that to find the joy and contentment that the world’s view of love is completely devoid of.

We already discussed the idea that God is love. God doesn’t simply value love or show the characteristics of love, he is love. It is at his very core. It drives everything he does. It’s in God’s DNA. It should come as no surprise then that the idea of love is a pervasive theme of the Bible. It has been written that if the theme of Bible is man’s redemption, then the central word of the Bible is love. (Turner, Allan. The Law of Agape. AllanTurner.com. Allan Turner. January 15, 1999. 7/12/2006).

When asked about the greatest commandment, our Lord Jesus replied:

“ ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.” (Matthew 22:38-40)

In these 48 words, Jesus answered the age old question, “what does God want from me?” with an astoundingly simple answer. God desires that we love, first him, then other. There is a hymn called Love is the Theme written by Albert C Fischer. I had never heard it before I started this study, but it captures the truth of the paramount importance of love as follows:

Of the themes that men have known,
One supremely stands alone;
Through the ages it has shown,
’Tis His wonderful, wonderful love.

Love is the theme, love is supreme;
Sweeter it grows, glory bestows;
Bright as the sun ever it glows!
Love is the theme, eternal theme!

From God’s love in the Garden of Eden – to Christ’s love on the cross – to God’s love in the Book of Revelation, love pervades the entire Bible. Love truly is the thread which binds together the Greatest Story Ever Told. God is love, and we are commanded by God to love him and to love others.

In Paul’s prayer for the Ephesian church, he writes,

And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. (Ephesians 3:17b-19)

In this world, in our fallen state, we can never, and will never, fully understand the love of God. How could we? How could we begin to understand the kind of love that allowed, and maybe even compelled, our God to create us with the complete foreknowledge that he would have to give up his heavenly throne, come to earth and die on the cross to save us from our sins?

We can be comforted by the following though:

“For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” [Romans 8:38-39]

So, what’s the point? Why should we strive to understand the biblical definition of love when the Bible itself tells us that it surpasses all knowledge? Because, we must be rooted in love in order to understand love. In order for our love to survive and to thrive, it must be nurtured. In order to nurture love we must understand it. In order to understand love, we must study what God reveals to us about it. In other words, in order to live love, we must practice love, and in order to practice love, we must study love. I like the quote from “God’s Little Instruction Book on Love:”

“Love thrives in the face of all life’s hazards, save one – neglect. (From the booklet, “God’s Little Instruction Book on Love”)

Paul sums up the importance of love in the three verses that precede the verses we will be looking at:

If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing. (1 Corinthians 13:1-3)

Paul’s message is simple, no matter what we do or achieve in this life, it is nothing without love. It is with this understanding in mind that we must view passages like 1 Corinthians 13. It is with the goal of being conformed to the image of Christ that we must strive to live out God’s image of love.

That, said, before we embark on a more detailed study of the aspects of love, some understanding of the context of 1 Corinthians is helpful. Paul wrote his first letter to the Corinthian church around 55 A.D. to address many of the problems that had arisen in the church there. Indeed, many of the problems within the church resulted from conformity to the non-Christian church in Corinth. The city of Corinth at the time Paul wrote this letter was a thriving city that was commercially and politically one of the chief cities of Greece. It was a major center of trade and a cross roads for travelers by both land and sea.

The culture of Corinth was very typically Greek – interested in philosophy and placing a high value on wisdom. Corinth was the home of at least 12 temples including a famous temple dedicated to Aphrodite, the Greek goddess of love. Aphrodite worshippers engaged in the practice of religious prostitution. The NIV Study Bible says, “Like any large commercial city, Corinth was a center for open and unbridled immorality.” The Greek verb “to Corinthianize” came to mean “to practice sexual immorality.” Rampant materialism and sexually oriented religion based on the Goddess Aphrodite had produced a climate based primarily on personal pleasure. The following is a list of some of the problems which Paul addressed to the Christians in the Corinthian church in this same letter:

• Division in the family of God (1-3)
• Pride and spiritual arrogance (4)
• Sexual promiscuity (5)
• Lawsuits between believers (6)
• Troubled marriages (7)
• Abuse of spiritual liberty (8-10)
• Abuse of the lord’s table (11)
• Misuse of spiritual gifts (12,14)
• Neglect of doctrinal basics (15)

If I hadn’t prefaced this introduction with the indication that I was describing the city of Corinth, you might have read the previous description and thought I was talking about our society today. Many of the problems experienced by the Corinthians are common in our culture and the church today.

After addressing many of the problems in Corinth, Paul tells the Corinthians in Chapter 13 that love is the solution. “Now these three remain: faith, hope and love, but the greatest of these is love.” [1 Corinthians 13:13] It means a whole lot more than some trite inclusion in a wedding ceremony. If love could solve the problems in Corinth 2000 years ago, it can changes lives anywhere at any time!

Return to the Love That Surpasses All Knowledge (A Biblical Definition of Love) index page.

Related posts:

1. The Flow of Love
2. A Love That Surpasses All Knowledge
3. Hurry Up and Wait!

Someone asked me how I felt the other day, and my answer was “content.” I’m paraphrasing, but the reply to my statement was something like “sorry to hear that.” We went on to discuss that I felt like “content” was a good thing and a great way to feel. On the other hand, their impression was that “content” has a negative connotation, and that someone who was “just content” should strive towards something better. That got me thinking about what it really means to be content.

What is the source of contentment in our lives? Many people search all kinds of areas for contentment….other people, relationships, kids, money, alcohol, drugs, causes, things, etc. You name it, and people try to use it to find contentment. The problem is that as soon as we get to a point that seems like contentment with one thing, some other desire or perceived need arises and we become discontent all over again.

We live in a culture built around discontentment. Look at any advertisement on television. The basic premise is that you should not be happy with what you have, and the next thing you buy will bring that happiness and contentment. Ironically, that next always happens to be the thing that’s being advertised. One more new thing, and you will be happy! We have grown up in, and live in, a culture which is discontent at its very core. We seek contentment everywhere we never truly find it because we neglect the source of true contentment. I believe the high divorce rate in our culture is a glaring example of how we have built a culture of discontentment. Rather than “rejoicing in the wife of our youth,” so many become discontent and convince themselves that they can do better the next time. The increased divorce rates for subsequent marriages, though, indicates that this is not the case.

So, where do we find true contentment? We find it only in God. He is the only thing in life which can give us true contentment. The great thing about the contentment that we find with God is that it spreads to other areas of our lives. It is unrealistic to think to something we buy can make us truly happy and content. Only the maker of those things holds that power in his hands. It is unfair to expect that another person can bring us that contentment. Only the creator of that person holds that gift. True contentment in our lives can only come from our Lord and Savior.

So, that leads to the next question – is contentment enough? Should we strive for more? My opinion is that absent contentment we can not truly achieve the other things we strive for in our lives. Without contentment, we can not love the way we were built to love. Without contentment, we are not free to achieve the victories that God has planned for us. Without contentment, we can never find lasting enjoyment in the successes of this life. Without contentment, we are simply living our lives towards some goal rather than living our lives for the glory of God.

Contentment with our lives, with our circumstances, with our relationships, with our shortcomings and with our flaws frees us to become more, to become better, to become all that God designed us to be. Contentment with all those things is a gift given to us only by the grace of God. We can not achieve it, we can only ask for it and thank God that he gives it to us.

It is no coincidence that the fruits of the spirit (love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control) are all outgrowths of contentment.

The Apostle Paul put it best in his letter to the Phillipians,

“I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through him who strengthens me.”

No matter our circumstances, the source of our contentment is Jesus Christ!

No related posts.