Sam starts with a great summary of the importance of redemption:

One of the greatest messages we can give to every family we come in contact with is the message of redemption. In kids’ ministry, today, we deal with more broken hearts and broken families than ever before. I believe every family needs to experience the power of redemption.

In a ministry where so many focus on fun and games, I was happy to see Sam bring it back where it really belongs…to the redemptive power of Christ.  That is the power we want to see in the kids we minister to.  In a hurt and broken world, and in the hurt and broken little hearts that we see each weekend, we long for the redemptive power of Christ to work in their lives.

From there, Sam moves to a very practical discussion of why the idea of redemption is critical to our ministries:

Oftentimes, parents stay at arms length away from our ministries because we can set the bar so high they feel they can’t reach it. The message we need to be sending to the parents who attend our churches and to those who have yet to attend is that we are not looking for perfect families because they don’t exist.  Our goal in kids’ ministries needs to be helping families understand that following Christ is a process where we fail and He redeems.

So many in our society strive to present the image of the perfect family.   And, those of us who don’t live up to that image, can easily succumb to guilt and even despair.  In children’s and family ministry, we must help parents to understand that there are no perfect people and no perfect families.  Church must be a safe place for imperfect people.  It must be a place where parents can come for biblical advice on how to run their families without fearing being transparent in their family life.

With all that insight, I actually found the last thing Sam wrote to be the most important of all:

When our kids grow up understanding true forgiveness and real redemption they will never settle for cheap grace.

Our God did not come to Earth and die on a cross for cheap grace, and it cheapens his work in human history when reduce our teaching to his children to that level.  Our job is to help them, not just understand the redemptive power of Christ, but to experience that power.  If we can do that, I am confident that we will have accomplished our purpose.

Questions for further discussion

The stated purpose of this book is to elicit further conversation.  I have included some of my thought above, but like other chapters I have included a listing of additional questions to spark further conversation.  Here are the questions I came up with:

1. Is there anything that you are doing or teaching that you feel cheapens the presentation of the grace of God?
2. What does your church do to attract imperfect families?
3. What systems do you have set up in your ministry to address the broken hearts and broken families of the kids you minister to?
4. What examples of the redemptive power of Christ have you seen in the kids you minister to?
5. How do you explain the idea of redemption to younger children?

By the way, I borrowed the images for this post from the actual e-book which you can download here for free! The stunning artwork was developed by Imago.

You can find a link to this, and all the other articles I’ve done related to this book, on my What Matters Now in Children’s Ministry Page.

Related posts:

1. What Matters Now in Children’s Ministry – Worldview
2. What Matters Now in Children’s Ministry – Sufficiency Dr. Rob Rienow
3. What Matters Now in Children’s Ministry – Infectious by The Lads

When Larry Shallenberger announced several months ago that he was planning on doing a book blog tour to celebrate the fifth anniversary of his book, I eagerly signed up.  I don’t know Larry personally, but I do follow his comments on Twitter and read his blog, so I kind of feel like I know him even if he doesn’t follow me on Twitter.   Based on that presumption of relationship, and the generally laid back nature of people in children’s ministry, I will refer to him as Larry throughout this review.

Anyhow, I knew that regardless of what the book was about, Larry’ has a great sense of humor and an easy to read writing style, so I knew reading his book wouldn’t be a complete waste of time.  That said, when I found out the topic of the book was leadership, I got just a little bit leery.  It’s not that I don’t like reading about leadership or being a leader.  I actually do, but the world has plenty of books on leadership, and I have read a bunch of them.  It seems the everybody who has ever been a boss or started a ministry or had people report to them has taken it upon themselves to write a book on leadership.  After a while, they all just seem to say the same thing – do it my way and you’ll be OK, and it ultimately all runs together into a fuzzy blurry haze in my head.  Besides that, I already have a group of people whose writings, podcasts, etc. on topic of leadership I devour.  They include people like Andy Stanley, Jim Wideman, and others who I have grown to trust in this area and have learned a lot from.  With all due respect to Larry, I wasn’t sure what he could offer that hadn’t either already heard or wasn’t getting from some of the other resources I was reviewing.

There’s an old, slightly cliché, saying that “You can’t judge a book by its cover.”  I agree in principal, and Larry’s book turned out to be a prime example of this for me and another reason I try not to let pre-conceived notions totally guide what I choose to read.  Now, I’ve never recommended that someone not read this book, but if it hadn’t been for this blog tour, I’m not sure I ever would have read it either.  Had that happened, I would have missed out.

What was my overall impression?

Larry’s book opened my eyes, and my heart, to ideas and theories that I had never even considered.  It is written in a style that I personally found compelling and engaging with plenty of practical advice thrown in for good measure.   Not only is this book one I learned from on my initial read through, it is one that I am certain to refer back to time and time again.  With those general observations out of the way, let’s a little more detailed look at the book itself.

How is this review different from other reviews?

I know what you’re thinking – even if you won’t admit it.  10 reviews in 10 days by 10 different people, why should I read yours?  You think you have issues?  I found out that my review was going to be number 7 of 10.  I didn’t get to lead off with the epic home run that leave people wanting more.  I don’t get to close with quips of wisdom.  What on earth was I going to write about that would be different than everyone else?  Here’s what I decided – I would write I want.  It’s kind of freeing in a way.   I decided to do with this book what I do with many of my reviews here on Dad in the Middle (especially the good ones) and feature a whole lot more content from the book than my own personal opinion while still offering some insight into what I got out of it.  Hopefully this will give you enough information to discern whether or not you want to read it for yourself.  I hope that you will as the book will give you a ridiculous amount of additional detail not available in this review.

Who is this book written for?

The book is written specifically for those of us in children’s ministry.  Indeed, the subtitle is “Discovering Your Leadership Style in Children’s Ministry.”  That said, the principles throughout this book are just as applicable to any other ministry and to life in general.  As someone with a passion for children’s ministry though, I appreciate that the focus of this book is squarely on children’s ministry and children’s ministry leaders.

What is the basic premise of the book?

The books starts by dispelling what Larry calls “the myth of the perfect leader.”  He notes that we, as a society, spend our time looking for and/or trying to be the perfect leader – the leader who bring everything to the table and is capable of juggling all the balls which leadership invariably throws at us.  Other people compare us to this mythical leader, and more importantly, we compare ourselves to this mythical leader and find ourselves lacking.  I know that, in my own life, this is something that I have been guilty of many time.  Larry explains that there is no such things as the perfect leader.  That’s not the way God made us, and:

When we try to be someone God didn’t wire us to be, we make it very hard for God to use us.

Imagine that!  In trying to lead the ministries God has called us to, we try to be more than God has made us to be and end up doing less than God has enabled us to do.

Larry has quite cleverly and effectively positioned this book on leadership around something those of us in children’s ministry can relate to – an object lesson.   In this case, Larry explores leadership styles as they relate to putting on a play and then examines how those styles relate to children’s ministry.  Now, I’ve never put on a big production in Children’s Ministry, but the analogy itself is so illuminating that I still found it helpful and educational.

What are the different facets of leadership?

Larry follows up shattering the myth of the perfect leader by noting five stars that any children’s ministry leadership team needs to have to be truly effective.  He notes that no one leader can possibly bring all of these stars.  They are:

1. Describing the Promised Land – a destination towards which your ministry is heading – a vision
2. Providing Road Maps – strategic plans and listing of core values
3. Tending to the Tool Box – making sure the right skills and resources are available
4. Keeping the Ministry “Heart-Healthy” – tending to heart of the ministry ensuring positive outlook and optimism
5. Providing Muscle – ability to get things done

The purpose of this book is to examine leadership styles and what we can bring to the table in terms of the five stars of leadership.  In addition to that, it offers advice on how to train ourselves to be better leaders in areas where we are not and understand the other facets of leadership so that you can surround yourself with the right types of people to have a five-star ministry.  Larry points out the following:

We tend to surround ourselves with people who think like we do.

Instead, in order to be effective leaders, we must surround ourselves with people who compliment our strengths and make up for our weaknesses.  There is much to be gained by understanding the leadership styles presented in this book.

Who doesn’t love a test?

I have to admit it.  I love tests.  I really do.  I like personality tests, gifting tests, political affiliation tests, etc., etc., etc.  Give me a series of seemingly random questions and then reduce it to a profile about me, and I love it!  So, when I wandered past Chapter 1 of the book and found Chapter 2, I was ecstatic!  I know you think I’m embellishing my reaction, but I’m really not.  I also imagine you’re thinking, “Really, we’re only on Chapter 2?  I thought this was a review not the actual book!”  I promise, it’ll pick up.

Anyhow, Chapter 2 is “the dramatic leadership assessment test” in which you answer 48 questions with an indication of how often they apply to you.  Fill out the number grid, add up the numbers and this test will rank six different leadership styles as the apply to you (with your highest score being your most prevalent style, and so on).

So, what are the leadership styles?

If I’m being honest, it was this test that really peaked my interest in the book.  Larry’s work went from being some abstract, albeit good, principals about leadership to something very personal – what is my leadership style?  After filling out the test, I couldn’t wait to jump to the chapter describing my most prevalent style, which I did.  I actually read all six in order of decreasing prevalence from my own test results.  The ones which matched my profile were interesting.  It’s always fun to see how well they actually match up to you, and they were spot on in this case.  Much to my surprise however, I learned just as much (maybe more) from reading the bottom three as the top three.  It’s was insightful to learn about people with leadership styles which represent my weaknesses and figure out who and how to incorporate those into my leadership style.  I think this is where Larry has really hit it out the park with his book, and I think this is why this book becomes much more of a reference work for constant review than just a one-time read.

So, Chapters 3 through 8 each describe one of the leadership styles.  Each chapter start with a reference to the ongoing Production object lesson followed by a profile of the leadership style, a biblical case study, a contemporary case study, and specific ideas and practical application about how to lead with each style whether or not it is your strength.  Each chapter ends with a prayer based on the leadership style and some questions for discussion.  Before I list the styles, I should say that the parts of each chapter which I enjoyed the most were the biblical case study and the contemporary case study.  My leadership style (which I’ll discuss later) says I like to go to the Bible to learn about leadership and kids, so it’s no surprise that I enjoyed the Biblical case study for each leadership style.  However, I also enjoyed the contemporary case study in which Larry interviewed and shared the perspectives of the likes of Jim Wideman, Karl Bastian (the Kidologist), Craig Jutlia and others.

So, without any further delay, here are the six leadership styles as Larry defines them along with a brief explanation of each:

What were my results?

Well, thanks for asking.  I actually took the test twice.  The differences were only minor, but I spent more time reflecting on each question the second time, so here are the results from that test (including scores for each style out of a potential total of 24):

1. Drama Coach (21)
2. Director (20)
3. Stage Manager (17)
4. Production Assistant (17)
5. Stage Hand (12)
6. Theater Manager (11)

After review the types, I have to say that this assessment was pretty spot on for me.

What else is in the book?

The final chapters of the book include brief summaries of each type of leadership style, an assessment sheet for discerning your own strengths and weaknesses, suggestions for teaching your team about different leadership styles and the epilogue to the production narrative that runs throughout the book.

What didn’t I like?

I always feel compelled to include this section in my reviews or people just don’t believe the disclaimer below.  So, what didn’t I like about this book?  Well, despite looking far and wide, I couldn’t find anything in the book about sarcasm or long winded explanations – both of which are included amongst my leadership gifts.  Other than that, I couldn’t really find anything I didn’t like.

What disclaimer?

This one.  I received a free copy of this book (actually two) from Larry in order to participate in this book blog tour.  While I appreciate the free copy, it did not in any way impact the contents of this review.

So, this all sounds awesome, what do I do next?

If you already own the book, go read it again.  If you don’t, you can purchase it here. .

Shouldn’t you be giving one away?

Now, that’s a good idea!  Larry actually gave me a signed copy to give away.  If you want to enter, do one of the following:

1. Leave a comment below; or
2. Send the following tweet – RT @stocksohio is giving away a free copy of Lead the Way God Made You. Find out how you can win: http://wp.me/pN5Ju-110 #kidmin #cmconnect

Winner will be drawn from all entries before 9:00 AM, Wednesday, July 14, 2010.

Will this review ever end?

Yep.  I’m done now!

Related posts:

1. DON’T HUG A GRUDGE by Donna Perugini (A Dad in the Middle Review)
2. CONNECT WITH YOUR KIDS – By Jim Wideman (A Dad in the Middle Review)
3. FAITHWEAVER PARENT CLASS (A Dad in the Middle Review)

We have now come to the final chapter of Spurgeon’s book of advice to those who work with kids both in church and as parents.  In this final chapter, Spurgeon continues to examine what we can learn from the story of Elisha and the Shunammite woman’s son.  He turns first to the location where the dead boy was placed and the method by which Elisha raised the boy.  Spurgeon notes that:

“The great secret lies in a large measure in powerful supplication.”

Elisha went into the room, shut the door, and prayed to the Lord.  As teachers and workers in Children’s Ministry, our power must come from God, and that power comes in large part through prayer.  Spurgeon explains:

“So it is with you; every real teacher’s power must come from on high. If you never enter your closet and shut to the door, if you never plead at the mercy-seat for your child, how can you expect that God will honour you in its conversion?… You will see your children converted when God gives you to individualise their cases, to agonize for them, and to take them one by one, and with the door closed to pray with them and for them. There is much with more influence in prayer privately offered with one than in prayer publicly uttered in the class—not more influence with God, of course, but more influence with the child. Such prayer will often be made its own answer; for God may, while you are pouring out your soul, make your prayer to be a hammer to break the heart which mere addresses had never touched.”

Spurgeon pleads that we pray individually for the kids in our ministry.  Find out their needs and pray for them.  Pray with them.  Recognize their greatest need (for Jesus Christ) and pray earnestly for that.

Following prayer, Elisha’s next step was to take action (which Spurgeon refers to as the means).  Prayer and means must go hand-in-hand.  Spurgeon elaborates on the necessity of action:

“Means without prayer—presumption! Prayer without means—hypocrisy!”

In order to raise a child from spiritual death, we must feel that death deep within our souls:

“God would have you come into contact with that death by painful, crushing, humbling sympathy…If you would raise that dead child, you must feel the chill and horror of that child’s death yourself… I cannot believe that you will ever pluck a brand from the burning, without putting your hand near enough to feel the heat of the fire. You must have, more or less, a distinct sense of the dreadful wrath of God and of the terrors of the judgment to come, or you will lack energy in your work, and so lack one of the essentials of success… Depend upon it, when the death that is in your children alarms, depresses, and overwhelms you, then it is that God is about to bless you.”

Elisha’s means was to lie on top of the boy in order to revive him.  He physically put himself in the position of the boy in order to bring about the resurrection.  Likewise, we must find a way to put ourselves in the position of children in order to lead them to salvation:

“you must next strive to adapt yourself as far as possible to the nature, and habits, and temperament of the child. Your mouth must find out the child’s words, so that the child may know what you mean; you must see things with a child’s eyes; your heart must feel a child’s feelings, so as to be his companion and friend; you must be a student of juvenile sin; you must be a sympathiser in juvenile trials; you must, so far as possible, enter into childhood’s joys and griefs. You must not fret at the difficulty of this matter, or feel it to be humiliating. If anything difficult be required, you must do it, and not think it difficult. God will not raise a dead child by you if you are not willing to become all things to that child, if by any possibility you may win its soul”

In order to teach kids, we have to understand them.  We have to put ourselves in their position.  We must understand their culture, their fears, their desires and their routines.  We must learn to think like they think and speak such that they can understand.  In order to be effective in children’s ministry we must become keen observers of kids and their world.  Spurgeon explains the type of person necessary to do this work:

“He is no fool who can talk to children; a simpleton is much mistaken if he thinks that his folly can interest boys and girls. It needs our best wits, our most industrious studies, our most earnest thoughts, our ripest powers, to teach our little ones. You will not quicken the child until you have “stretched” yourself; and, though it seems a strange thing, yet it is so. The wisest man will need to exercise all his abilities if he would become a successful teacher of the young.”

Working with kids is not easy.  I actually find the challenge of it to be one of the most exciting parts of this ministry.  If it comes too easily to you, you are probably not investing as much of yourself as you should.  Children’s Ministry should be such that it requires you to stretch yourself in order to succeed.

The result of Elisha’s actions was that the boy was raised.  That should be our goal as well:

“Here, then, is the secret. You must impart to the young your own soul; you must feel as if the ruin of that child would be your own ruin… Never be satisfied with finding your children in a barely hopeful state, What you want is not mere conviction, but conversion; you desire not only impression, but regeneration. Life, life from God, the life of Jesus. This your scholars need, and nothing less must content you.”

Salvation and discipleship are our goals, and we must never lose sight of either.  I hope this synopsis (and Mr. Spurgeon’s book) have convicted you, helped you and provide you with some ideas to further succeed in Children’s Ministry.  God bless you, and may God bless the children in your ministries.

Links to Complete Text

If you’re interested in reading the complete text of “Come Ye Children,” it can be found on at: http://www.spurgeon.org/misc/cyc.htm

The complete text of Chapter Twenty-Three can be found at: http://www.spurgeon.org/misc/cyc23.htm

<<LAST TIME: Chapter 22 – The Shunammite Woman’s Son

Return to the Come Ye’ Children (A Synopsis) index page.

Related posts:

1. The Shunammite Woman’s Son (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 22)
2. Abijah’s “Some Good Thing” II (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 21)
3. Of Such Is The Kingdom of Heaven (Synopsis of Come Ye' Children – Chapter 5)

About the Book

The quip on the back of the book describes its purpose quite clearly:

Jim Wideman has put together a practical resource to help us slow down and ensure that we are establishing the types of connections with our kids that will allow us to disciple them and help them to establish a Biblical worldview.

About the Author

Jim Wideman is a fixture in the Children’s Ministry community as the author of numerous book, a frequent conference speaker, a mentor and a prolific blogger.  I’ve made no secret that I am a huge fan of his work.  He offers sounds advice in an engaging way, and I was excited to get my hands on this book.

Brother Jim starts this book with a history of how he came to be in children’s ministry in the first place.  Years ago, he was working in children’s ministry when he was asked to cover the children’s ministry.  He began to pray that God would raise someone up with a vision for the children’s ministry, and much to his surprise, the person God raised up was him.  He explains:

“Over the years I’ve tried to quit so many times that it’s not even funny. But I can’t – I just can’t rid of that vision.  Ministering to children is the driving force of my life.”

And, thank goodness for that.  For decades now, he had spoken into the lives of children and those of us who work with children, and this book is no exception.  One of the other things that resonates with me about Jim Wideman is that he is also a father, and by all accounts a very good one.  He has two grown girls and unashamedly explains that is he reaches every child in the world but not his own, he will be a failure.  As a father of four, this resonates with me.

Brief Review of the Book

Teaching Our Kids to Be Problem Solvers

The first chapter in this book starts by defining the two types of people in this world.  There are people who see a problem and wait for someone to solve it – the followers.  The second group of people are leaders, and this is the type of person we should strive for our children to be.  The book starts with an explanation of what a leader is.  Jim offers a great concise definition:

“A leader is a person who comes face-to-face with any type of challenge or problem and solves it.  He or she looks to God’s Word for directions and approaches the situation by faith.  As a result, this person can handle anything.”

He then proceeds to offers some of the signs to look for in a leader/problem solver:

• Choosing your problem
• Having the right attitude
• Training through adversity
• Looking for Biblical examples

As parents, we should strive to teach our kids how to be problem solvers.

Rooting Our Children in the Things of God

From there, he moves into the things we can do as parents to make sure our kids “are established in the things of God.”  By doing so, we will give them the tools to make decisions and develop a biblical worldview.  As much as I would like to share the details of each of these steps, for purposes of this review, I will just list them.  I encourage you to get the book and delve further into each step.  With that said, here are the 12 steps Brother Jim offers to root our children in the things of God:

1. Make Jesus the king of your household
2. Love your spouse the way you want your kids to love their spouse
3. Spend time with your kids
4. Be consistent in discipline
5. Allow your children to be different as God has created them
6. Encourage your kids to develop their unique giftings
7. Become a student of your child’s world
8. Admit your mistakes and correct it when you’re wrong
9. Talk to your kids about everything
10. Make your home somewhere that your kids’ friends are welcome
11. Don’t teach your children to be rebellious by rebelling against authority yourself
12. Don’t exasperate your children

What makes this book great is more than just this list.  For each items in the list, Jim offers detailed and practical advice on how to accomplish it.

My Recommendation

I have already hinted at it.  OK. OK.  I’ve already come right out and said it.  If you are a parent, or someone who works with kids, you should read this book.  If you are in a position in children’s ministry to recommend a book to the parents of kids in your ministry, this would be a great one.  Jim Wideman is a great resource when it comes to the things of children’s ministry, and this book proves that he is equally adept at providing advice to parents on raising their kids.  Buy this book.  Read it.  Read it again.  Make lists of the suggestions in this book, and find a way to implement them in your own life.  If you do, you will be a better parent, a better person and a better follower of Christ.

Related posts:

1. LEAD THE WAY GOD MADE YOU by LARRY SHALLENBERGER (a Dad in the Middle Review)
2. FAITHWEAVER PARENT CLASS (A Dad in the Middle Review)
3. GOD’S KIDS WORSHIP MODERN CD 3-PACK (A Dad in the Middle Review)

In 2 Kings 4, we read the story of Elisha and the Shunammite woman.  The Shunammite woman was a wealthy woman who always invited Elisha in to stay in her house when he passed her way.  Elisha stayed so often that she eventually convinced her husband to build a small room on the roof for Elisha to stay.  The woman had no children, and in return for her hospitality, Elisha pronounced to her that she would have a son within the next year.

When the woman’s son had grown he began to complain of a headache and eventually died.  The woman put him in the room on the roof and set off to go find Elisha.  When Elisha heard the news, he sent his servant (Gehazi) ahead of him to lay his staff on the boy.  On his way to the boy, Elisha met Gehazi who eas returning to tell him that the staff had failed to awaken the child.  When Elisha arrived and found the boy still dead, he went into the room, laid on top of him and revived the child from death.

In this chapter and the next, Spurgeon explores the lessons to be learned from this story.  Although this story deals with the actual physical death of a child, Spurgeon notes that those of us in Children’s Ministry deal with the spiritual deaths of children.  That is a reality that is important for us to recognize.  Spurgeon explains:

“Unless you have a very clear sense of the utter ruin and spiritual death of children, you will be incapable of being made a blessing to them. Go to them, I pray you, not as to sleepers whom you can by your own power awaken from their slumber, but as to spiritual corpses who can only be quickened by a power divine… May you never be content with aiming at secondary benefits, or even with realising them; may you strive for the grandest of all ends, the salvation of immortal souls. Your business is not merely to teach children to read the Bible, not barely to inculcate the duties of morality, nor even to instruct them in the mere letter of the gospel, but your high calling is to be the means, in the hands of God, of bringing life from heaven to dead souls.”

That is the arena that we deal in – the spiritual life or death of the kids we leave.  Obviously, God can do anything with, or in despite of, our efforts, but we must recognize that a failure on our art could result in the eternal spiritual death of a child.  Our aim in Children’s Ministry is resurrection.  We do not seek physical resurrection as Elisha does but spiritual resurrection of the kids in our ministries.  We seek their resurrection from spiritual death to eternal life.  That said, we must recognize that we are in no position to raise kids from spiritual death on our own.  Like Elisha, we must rely solely on the power of God to actually accomplish the resurrection of these kids.

Spurgeon offers the following words of encouragement to those of us who work with kids:

“And you, devoted, anxious, prayerful teacher, remain no longer a common being, you have become, in a special manner, the temple of the Holy Ghost; God dwelleth in you, and you by faith have entered upon the career of a wonder-worker. You are sent into the world not to do the things which are possible to man, but those impossibilities which God worketh by His Spirit, by the means of His believing people. You are to work miracles, to do marvels. You are not, therefore, to look upon the restoration of these dead children, which in God’s name you are called to bring about, as being a thing unlikely or difficult when you remember who it is that works by your feeble instrumentality.”

Secondly, Spurgeon points to the failed attempt of Elisha in sending his servant ahead of him to try to raise the boy.  Elisha had previously been the servant to another well know prophet – Elijah.  In 1 Kings 17 we read the story of how Elijah had resurrected a widow’s son.  If Elisha had followed the example of his teacher Elijah from the beginning, he would have known that sending his servant ahead would not be effective.   In the same way that Elisha should have followed the example of his teacher Elijah, Spurgeon argues that we must follow the example of our Master and Teacher Jesus Christ:

“With far more force may I say to you that it will be well if, as teachers, we imitate the modes and methods of our glorified Master, and learn at His feet the art of winning souls. Just as He came in deepest sympathy into the nearest contact with our wretched humanity, and condescended to stoop to our sorrowful condition, so must we come near to the souls with whom we have to deal, yearn over them with His yearning, and weep over them with His tears, if we would see them raised from the state of sin. Only by imitating the spirit and manner of the Lord Jesus shall we become wise to win souls. I am afraid that very often the truth which we deliver is a thing which is extraneous and out of ourselves; like a staff which we hold in our hand, but which is not a part of ourselves, We take doctrinal or practical truth, as Gehazi did the staff, and we lay it upon the face of the child, but we ourselves do not agonise for its soul. We try this doctrine and that truth, this anecdote and the other illustration, this way of teaching a lesson and that manner of delivering an address; but so long as ever the truth which we deliver is a matter apart from ourselves and unconnected with our innermost being, so long it will have no more effect upon a dead soul than Elisha’s staff had upon the dead child.”

Our teaching must follow the example of our Lord and be the result of an internal torment at the notion that a failure on our part may result in the eternal death of a child.  Absent that conviction, a rote teaching of doctrinal and biblical principals will not be effective in winning children to Christ.  Elisha’s servant Gehazi’s response to Elisha upon the failure of his staff to resurrect the child was to tell Elisha that it had failed to “awaken” the boy.  He seems to have missed the actual status of the boy.  Spurgeon notes that as teachers we must understand the true depravity of the kids we teach in order to be effective:

“God will not bless those teachers who do not grasp in their hearts the really fallen estate of their children. If you think the child is not really depraved, if you indulge foolish notions about the innocence of childhood and the dignity of human nature, it should not surprise you if you remain barren and unfruitful.”

Finally, Spurgeon notes that Elisha’s example should teach us that we must persevere even when we fail.  Elisha’s first effort, sending his servant, did not succeed.  That did not deter him from carrying on with his mission which eventually resulted in the boy being resurrected.  Spurgeon’s provides the following advice about failure:

“The lesson of your non-success is not—cease the work, but—change the method. It is not the person who is out of place, it is the plan which is unwise. If your first method has been unsuccessful, you must improve upon it. Examine wherein you have failed, and then, by changing your mode, or spirit, the Lord may prepare you for a degree of usefulness far beyond your expectation.”

Rather than allowing our failures to discourage us, we must look upon them and learn from them.  We must dispose of that which does not work and press on towards the goal of winning kids for Christ.

Links to Complete Text

If you’re interested in reading the complete text of “Come Ye Children,” it can be found on at: http://www.spurgeon.org/misc/cyc.htm

The complete text of Chapter Twenty-Two can be found at: http://www.spurgeon.org/misc/cyc22.htm

<<LAST TIME: Chapter 21 – Abijah’s “Some Good Thing,”—II

Chapter 23 – The Shunammite Woman’s Son—II: NEXT TIME>>

Return to the Come Ye’ Children (A Synopsis) index page.

Related posts:

1. The Shunammite Woman’s Son – II (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 23)
2. Obadiah and Elijah (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 19)
3. Of Such Is The Kingdom of Heaven (Synopsis of Come Ye' Children – Chapter 5)

Introduction

In the February installment of The Children’s Ministry Blog Patrol (February 2010), I featured an article from the blog of Donna Perugini.  That lead a brief exchange via e-mail in which she mentioned that she had written several children’s books.  She was kind enough to send me a free copy of one of her books titled “Don’t Hug a Grudge” for me to review for Dad in the Middle.

About the Author

Before jumping into the book, I like to know a little bit about the author.  Ms. Perugini’s blog indicates that she taught children the Word of God over 30 years.  Her blog indicates that her approach to teaching the Bible included “cutting it into bite-sized pieces and making it fun and entertaining.” In addition to Don’t Hug A Grudge, she has authored three other children’s books.  They include:

• Do Angels Go Camping
• The Flight of Orville Wright Caterpillar
• The Adventure of Amelia Airheart Butterfly in Bye! Bye!

In addition to being a writer Ms. Perugini is a wife, mother to three children and grandmother to four children.  She teaches a women’s bible study at her church and enjoys pottery and sculpting.

About the Book

This book, originally published in 1987, teaches children how to recognize a grudge and the harmful effects of holding on to that grudge rather than forgiving.  The reading level for this book per Amazon is ages 4-8 thought the message would be beneficial to all ages.  In fact, is one of our e-mails, Donna indicated that her intended target for this book is ages 8 to adult and that many adult bible study groups have used the book for their material.

For those of you who are familiar with the Veggietales series, the concept of this book reminds me of Larry Boy and the Fib from Outerspace though it was written well before that video.  In the Larry Boy video what starts as a small fib grows into a massive monster when not dealt with.  In this book, a little grudge grows into bitterness and resentment.  The books artfully explains how a grudge works its way into your life, takes hold and grows.  After a while, as the book points out, a grudge turns into resentment which begins to take over your life.  Finally, if not dealt with, that resentment grows to bitterness which impacts our relationships with others and our relationship with God.  Throughout, the book is clear the holding a grudge, bitterness and resentment are all sins and encourages the reader to be “washed by the Word.”  These pages offers scriptures reflecting God’s view of grudges, bitterness and resentment.

Things I Liked

There is much to like about this book.  The illustrations are wonderfully done and compliment the text well.  The representation of the grudge, resentment and bitterness as monsters is genius.  The little grudge appears first as a “baby” monster which is down-right cuddly at first then begins to take on a more sinister look as it is nursed.  To me, bitterness has the look of a young elementary age monster complete with a ball cap.  The image of resentment riding on our back hanging on as we carry it is a powerful picture of what resentment does in our lives.  Finally, Bitterness appears as an older more mature monster.  The images of the children throughout the story are also exceptionally well done.

This book pulls no punches.  This book is clear that “God hates Grudges, Resentment and Bitterness.” I like a book for kids that does labels sins for what they are and doesn’t try to sugar-coat it for it for kids.  God hates sin, and I think it is important for kids to understand that.  Without a proper understanding of sin, and their own sin, kids will never get to the place where they see their need for a Savior.  The verses included in the book are also a wonderful resource.  I think this book sets a great pattern for children to learn early and then apply throughout their lives.  That pattern is:

1. Identify the issue or action in question (in this case the holding of a grudge).
2. Consider the implications of that issue or action (in this case the metamorphosis of the grudge into bitterness and then resentment).
3. Go to the Bible for guidance (be “washed by the word”).
4. Implement what the Bible suggests (in this case forgiveness).

In doing so, this book lays a foundation that kids can use to confront any problem they may be facing.

Things I Thought Could Be Better

There were just a couple of things about the book which I wished may have been a little different – one substantive and one stylistic.  On a substantive layer, I appreciate that the book does not underestimate kids or talk down to them.  However, I felt that it lacked a good explanation of what a grudge really is.  It explains how they grow and how they work, but it never really defines what it is for kids who may not know.  Stylistically, this book is multi-lingual and every word is reflected in both English and Spanish.  While I appreciate the effort to make the book accessible to more people by making it multi-lingual, having the story reflected in both English and Spanish causes many of the pages to appear very cluttered.  I also found some of the text difficult to follow the first time I read the book because of all the characters on the page.

What My Kids Thought

With any book for kids, I like to run it by my kids and get their reactions.  My two year old son loves the book.  He particularly likes the illustrations.  My seven year old daughter liked the book and really like the pictures, though she did say that she still didn’t understand what a grudge was when the book was done.  My almost nine-year-old son (he prefers that language to eight year old) enjoyed the book and appreciated the lesson.  He also liked the scriptures included in the text.

My Recommendation

I would definitely recommend this book for parents and those who work with children.  Despite portions of the book seeming cluttered because of the multi-lingual format, the message is important for kids, and the presentation is strongly grounded in the Word of God.  The book pulls no punches when it comes to calling sin what it is, but it also provides kids with a better way through forgiveness.

More Information About the Book and the Author

If you are interested in obtaining this books, check out the author website at www.DonnaPerugini.com.

Ms. Perugini has also created a line of ceramics with the characters from her other books.  For more information, check out www.DonnaKPerugini.com.

For further information on Donna Perugini check out the following:

Blog:                 DonnaPerugini.blogspot.com
Twitter:           @DonnaPerugini
Facebook:      Facebook Fan Page

As her blog, Ms. Perugini has included some fun resources related to her books including coloring pages related to each book at http://donnaperugini.blogspot.com/p/coloring-pages.html.

Related posts:

1. CONNECT WITH YOUR KIDS – By Jim Wideman (A Dad in the Middle Review)
2. LEAD THE WAY GOD MADE YOU by LARRY SHALLENBERGER (a Dad in the Middle Review)
3. FAITHWEAVER PARENT CLASS (A Dad in the Middle Review)

This chapter continues Spurgeon’s discussion of the “the good thing” found in Abijah which started in the previous chapter.

Where was the good thing?

The “good thing” found in Abijah was not found in outward adornment, but the Bible tells us that it was found “in him.”  This causes Spurgeon to draw the following conclusion on the difference between outward religion and an inward relationship with Christ:

“The grand point is not to wear the garb, nor use the brogue of religion, but to possess the life of God within, and feel and think as Jesus would have done because of that inner life. Small is the value of external religion unless it be the outcome of a life within.”

The “good thing” was found in Abijah.  This implies that it did not require much searching.  In other words, the “good thing” was easily discernable in Abijah.  Spurgeon notes that piety in children is generally easily discernable:

“Zealous, child-like piety soon shows itself; a child is usually far less reticent than a man; the little lip is not frozen by cold prudence, but reveals the heart. Godliness in a child appears even upon the surface, so that persons who come into the house as visitors are surprised by the artless statements which betray the young Christian.”

Indeed, children often become some of the most unreserved evangelists for Christ.  They do not find themselves hindered by the reservations that older believers often face.

How should the “good thing” be received?

Spurgeon moves next to a discussion of how this “good thing” in Abijah, and in children in general, should be received.  He writes:

“We are not told of the grace in his heart what it was, nor whence it came, nor what special actions it produced, but there it was, found where none expected it. I believe that this case is typical of many of the elect children whom God calls by His grace in the courts and alleys of London. You must not expect that you shall jot down their experience, and their feelings, and their lives, and total them all up; you must not reckon to know dates and means specifically, but you must take the child as we have to take Abijah, rejoicing to find in him a little wonder of grace with God’s own seal upon him…and in like manner the Lord sets His attesting mark of grace on regenerated children, and we must be content to see it, even if some other things be wanting. Let us welcome with delight those works of the Holy Spirit which we cannot precisely describe.”

When children put their faith in Christ, and choose to follow him, we should focus on the grace given to them by God and not on their shortcomings.  Afterall, we are all short of what God would have us be.

A Discussion on the Suffering of Children

In the final part of this chapter, Spurgeon tackles the issue of suffering in Children.  After all, Abijah despite having some “good thing” in him was appointed by God to die as the rest of Jeroboam’s family was.  While he was spared from the brutal death and lack of burial the rest of his family would experince, he was still appointed to die which leads many to ponder the following:

“We cannot understand that God’s dear little children who love Him should often be called to suffer.”

Spurgeon deals first with the fact that Abijah was appointed to suffer and die while his evil parents remained well.  Spurgeon notes that it is through his sickness that God “ripened” him for glory faster than he may have been otherwise.  In other words, through his sickness, God ready him for his eventual entry into the kingdom of God.  As Spurgeon notes, while we not always know the reason for the suffering, we can trust in his eternal goodness.  God is good, and though we may not understand why something is happening, we can rest assured in the knowledge that God has our best interest at heart in everything he does.  Spurgeon also notes that oftentimes, God will work through the suffering of a child to bring his parents to Christ.  In this case, King Jeroboam and the queen could easily have found God in their child’s suffering, but they did not.

Finally, Spurgeon moves on to a question that trips up many people when it comes to their relationship with God – they question:

“…that some of God’s dearest children should die while they are yet young.”

How could a good God allow, let alone cause, a child to suffer and die?  It is a question that many non-Christians often pose as a smokescreen for their objections to God, and the story of Abijah allows us to tackle that question.  The long and short of it is that in taking Abijah early rather than allowing him to grow and suffer the fate of the remainder of Jeroboam’s family, God actually demonstrates his grace.  In essence, he spared him from the evil yet to come and opened to him the Kingdom of heaven.  In regards to Abijah, Spurgeon notes, “In this child’s case his early death was a proof of grace.”  Spurgeon summarizes:

“The Lord, in infinite mercy, often takes children home to Himself, and saves them from the trials of long life and temptation; because not only is there grace in them, but there is so much more grace than usual that there is no need for delay, they are ripe already for the harvest. It is wonderful what great grace may dwell in a boy’s heart: child piety is by no means of an inferior kind, it is sometimes ripe for heaven.”

Links to Complete Text

If you’re interested in reading the complete text of “Come Ye Children,” it can be found on at: http://www.spurgeon.org/misc/cyc.htm

The complete text of Chapter Twenty-One can be found at: http://www.spurgeon.org/misc/cyc21.htm

<<LAST TIME: Chapter 20 – Abijah’s “Some Good Thing”

Chapter 22 – The Shunammite Woman’s Son: NEXT TIME>>

Return to the Come Ye’ Children (A Synopsis) index page.

Related posts:

1. Abijah’s “Some Good Thing” (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 20)
2. Obadiah’s Early Piety (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 18)
3. Of Such Is The Kingdom of Heaven (Synopsis of Come Ye' Children – Chapter 5)

The Lord usually brings the rod before he brings the axe.  So starts this chapter based on the story of King Jeroboam and his son Abijah.  In this story recounted in 1 Kings 14, Jeroboam’s son Abijah had fallen sick.   So the King sent his wife, in disguise, to see the prophet Ahijah to find out what the fate of the boy would be.  The prophet told the Queen that as a result of all the evil King Jeroboam had committed that the kingdom would be ripped away from him and that every male in the house of Jeroboam would be cut off.  Regarding the King’s son Abijah, Ahijah told Jeroboam’s wife that  he was appointed to die as soon as her feet step back into the city and would not suffer the fate of the reminder of Jeroboam’s family.  This was because in Abiajh was found “some good thing toward Jehovah, God of Israel.”  The “some good thing” serves as the basis for this chapter and the next.  Spurgeon examines the “some good thing” found in Abijah that led God to spare him from the fate that befell the rest of the house of Jeroboam.

What was the “good thing?” found in Abijah

The Bible does not tell us specifically what form “the good thing” found in Abijah took.  Despite the lack of information regarding “the good thing,” Spurgeon asserts that there is something we can be certain of.  That is that the child must have had faith.  Spurgeon reminds us that without faith it is impossible to please God (Hebrews 11:6).  Since God showed Abijah grace in not allowing his to fall victim to the fate of the rest of King Jeroboam’s family is an indication that Abijah was likely a childhood believer in the Lord God.

When it comes to children, Spurgeon explains that they often speak more of their love of Christ than their trust or faith in Christ:

“…for converted children more usually talk of loving Christ than they do of trusting in Him: not because faith is not in them, but because the emotion of love is more congenial to the child’s nature than the more intellectual act of faith. The heart is large in the child, and therefore love becomes his most conspicuous fruit.”

As it related to the “good thing” found in Abijah, Spurgeon explains:

“It was not merely a good inclination which was in him, nor a good desire, but a really good, substantial virtue.”

Our goal in Children’s Ministry does not stop at just building a love for Christ.  After all, children love their teddy bears and ice cream as well.  We desire more than just a fondness or love for Christ.  Our goal is to develop a willingness and longing for Christ to be the Lord of their lives.

How did the “good thing” come to Abijah?

Again, we don’t know specifically how the good thing entered Abijah.  One thing that is clear though is that God recognized it in him.  Spurgeon explains:

“It is not essential to us to know how a child receives grace. We need not be painfully anxious to know when, or where, or how a child is converted; it may even be impossible to tell, for the work may have been so gradual that day and hour cannot be known.”

As Spurgeon notes, God sees the least good thing inside of all of us.  When a child professes faith in Christ, the important thing is the profession itself and not the details regarding the date and time that it happened.  Many adults who eventually come to Christ can recollect the exact moment when they received him.  The change in their lives is so marked that they will not soon forget the exact moment of their salvation.  On the other hand, Spurgeon notes that in kids the work of salvation is sometimes so gradual that it is impossible to know the exact date and time of conversion.

We don’t know how God placed the good thing in Abijah other than to know that it was the Lord God who put it there.  Despite Abijah’s wicked parents (and they are some of the most wicked recounted in the Old Testament), and despite the culture that in which Abijah lived, the grace of God found Abijah.  Despite a lack of parents willing to raise him in the fear and admonition of the Lord, God’s will and God’s grace still controlled Abijah’s life.  Spurgeon draws the following conclusion from the life of Abijah:

“Be it ours when we see in children some good thing to rest content with that truth, even if we cannot tell how it came there.”

Spurgeon notes that in Abijah’s case:

“God’s electing love is never short of means to carry out its purpose: He can send His effectual grace into the heart of Jeroboam’s family, and while the father is prostrate before his idols the Lord can find a true worshipper for Himself in the king’s own child.”

We should never lose hope in a child just because of the environment that he lives in.  The power of God to reach beyond circumstances to effectuate his grace and salvation is astounding.  To ignore a child, and refuse to pour into his life, because we have determined that he is beyond the saving reach of God is a blasphemy of the highest order.

What type of “good thing” was it?

Next, Spurgeon moves on the talk about the type of “good thing” found in Abijah and notes that it was a good thing towards God.  Spurgeon explains:

“In children there often will be found good things towards their parents: let these be cultivated—but these are not sufficient evidences of grace. In children there will sometimes be found good things towards amiability and moral excellence: let all good things be commended and fostered, but they are not sure fruits of grace. It is towards God that the good thing must be that saves the soul… The child had love, and there was in it love to Jehovah. He had faith, but it was faith in Jehovah. His religious fear was the fear of the living God; his childlike thoughts, and desires, and prayers, and hymns, went towards the true God. This is what we desire to see not only in children, but in adults; we wish to see their hearts turned to the Lord, and their minds and wills moving towards the Most High.”

Many Children’s Ministry focus on teaching children the virtues found in the Bible.  This is certainly a noble goal, but the critical thing that we must teach them is about God and the salvation that he offers. It is not enough that any type of “good thing” be found in child, but it must be a “good thing towards God.”

The Effect of the “Good Thing”

Finally in this chapter, Spurgeon examines the result of Abijah’s faith.  He notes that Abijah’s faith must have manifested itself to people because he was well loved.  When he died he received both tears and a tomb – a far cry from many royalty that died in those days received.  Indeed, the remainder of Jeroboam’s family was devoured by dogs.  However, the people saw something different in Abijah. His faith must have been evident to other people.  Spurgeon notes:

“It is a very blessed thing when there is such a good thing in our children that they come to be beloved in their little spheres.”

What a wonderful sight it is to see the evidences of faith displayed in the life of a child.  Spurgeon ends this chapter with a personal note on the grace of God seen in the lives of children:

“Youthful piety is a very touching thing to me; I see the grace of God in men and women with much thankfulness, but I cannot perceive it in children without shedding tears of delight. There is an exceeding beauty about these rosebuds of the Lord’s garden; they have a fragrance which we find not in the fairest of earth’s lilies. Love is won for the Lord Jesus in many a heart by these tiny arrows of the Lord, whose very smallness is a part of their power to penetrate the heart. The ungodly may not love the grace which is in the children, but since they love the children in whom that grace is found, they are no longer able to speak against religion as they otherwise would have done. Yea, more, the Holy Spirit uses these children for yet higher ends, and those who see them are often impressed with desires for better things.”

Links to Complete Text

If you’re interested in reading the complete text of “Come Ye Children,” it can be found on at: http://www.spurgeon.org/misc/cyc.htm

The complete text of Chapter Twenty can be found at: http://www.spurgeon.org/misc/cyc20.htm

<<LAST TIME: Chapter 19 – Obadiah and Elijah

Chapter 21 – Abijah’s “Some Good Thing,”—II: NEXT TIME>>

Return to the Come Ye’ Children (A Synopsis) index page.

Related posts:

1. Abijah’s “Some Good Thing” II (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 21)
2. Obadiah’s Early Piety (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 18)
3. Witnesses for God Converted in Youth (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 17)

This short chapter continues Spurgeon’s observations from the previous two chapters based on the story of Elijah and Obadiah.  It begins with yet another observation on the benefits of early piety.  Spurgeon notes:

“YOUTHFUL PIETY LEADS on to persevering piety.”

Obadiah observed that, “I thy servant fear the LORD from my youth.”  [1 Kings 18:12 KJV]”   He was able to proclaim this because time had not changed him or waivered his faith in God.  Obadiah had “run the race” and persevered.  Many people exalt martyrs who die for their faith, but Spurgeon explains:

“It is not burning quick to the death in martyrdom that is the hard work; roasting before a slow fire is a far more terrible test of firmness…the grace of God to preserve a believer for ten, twenty, thirty, forty, fifty years, is quite as great a miracle and deserves more of our praise than it usually commands.”

Rather than succumb to the popular notions of his day that included the worship of Baal, Obadiah stood firm in the belief in God that he had come to early in life.  He also held fast to his piety despite his wealth and position.  He worked in the court of the King, in the court of a King and Queen who were adverse to belief in God, and despite all that position offered, he remained faithful to God.  Spurgeon observes:

“There is nothing more perilous to a man than to prosper in this world and become rich and respectable.”

Indeed in terms of our spiritual journey, success is often harder to deal with than failure.  Finally, Spurgeon speaks to the “comfort” of early piety later in life:

“It will be a great comfort to people, when old, to look back upon a life spent in the service of God. You will not trust in it, you will not think that there is any merit in it; but you will bless God for it. A servant who has been with his master from his youth ought not to be turned adrift when he grows grey. A right-minded master respects the person who has served him long and well.”

Links to Complete Text

If you’re interested in reading the complete text of “Come Ye Children,” it can be found on at: http://www.spurgeon.org/misc/cyc.htm

The complete text of Chapter Nineteen can be found at: http://www.spurgeon.org/misc/cyc19.htm

<<LAST TIME:
Chapter 18 – Obadiah’s Early Piety

Chapter 20 – Abijah’s “Some Good Thing”
: NEXT TIME>>

Return to the Come Ye’ Children (A Synopsis) index page.

Related posts:

1. Obadiah’s Early Piety (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 18)
2. Witnesses for God Converted in Youth (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 17)
3. Abijah’s “Some Good Thing” II (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 21)

In the last chapter, we were introduced to Obadiah who later in his life worked in the hostile court of the evil King Ahab.  In this chapter, Spurgeon discusses the early piety of Obadiah.  In 1 Kings 18:12, during his exchange with Elijah, Obadiah states:

“…but I thy servant fear the LORD from my youth.  [1 Kings 18:12 KJV]”

The Bible does not tell us how Obadiah came to faith or who instructed him.  Spurgeon does postulate that based on Obadiah’s name (which means “the servant of Jehova”) that Obadiah’s parents were likely believers.  In a time when believers in God were frequently persecuted or even killed, the fact that Obadiah’s parents would name their son “the servant of Jehova” speaks to the faith of his parents and supports Spurgeon’s contention that they were likely believer.  On the importance of parents, Spurgeon notes:

“Whether this be so or not [that Obadiah’s parents were believers], it is quite certain that thousands of the most intelligent believers owe their first bent towards godliness to the sweet associations of home…we were consecrated to the service of God before we knew that there was a God. Many a tear of earnest prayer fell on our infant brow and sealed us for Heaven; we were nursed in the atmosphere of devotion; there was scarce a day in which we were not urged to be faithful servants of God, and entreated while we were yet young to seek Jesus and give our hearts to Him.”

Spurgeon also notes from the scripture passage the unique manner in which Obadiah refers to his faith from youth.  Specifically, Obadiah indicates that he has feared the Lord from his youth.  This is quite different than many people describe a child’s relationship with God.  Spurgeon explains:

“The way in which he described it is very instructive, ‘I thy servant fear the Lord from my youth.’ I hardly remember in all my life to have heard the piety of children described in ordinary conversation by this term, though it is the common word of the Scriptures. We say, ‘The dear child loved God.’ We talk of their ‘being made so happy,’ and so forth, and I do not question the rightness of the language; still, the Holy Spirit speaks of ‘the fear of the Lord’ as ‘the beginning of wisdom;’ and David says, ‘Come, ye children, hearken unto me: I will teach you the fear of the Lord.’ Children will get great joy through faith in the Lord Jesus; but that joy, if true, is full of lowly reverence and awe of the Lord.”

Indeed, even in childhood faith in the Lord and love of the Lord will ultimately manifest itself in fear of the Lord.  And, as those who disciple children, we should not neglect the fear of the Lord in teaching them.

Our goal in Children’s Ministry is to bring young children to a saving knowledge of Jesus Christ.  Spurgeon notes the numerous advantages of coming to early faith:

1. Those saved early can be saved from “a thousand regrets” that those saved later in life will have experienced before their salvation.
2. Early piety allows a person to form associations and friendships early in life that will benefit the individual for their entire lives.  Indeed, the company we keep has a significant impact on our entire lives.  As a result, early piety saves us from harmful associations.
3. Early piety helps us to form godly habits and avoid the opposite.
4. Early piety allows us to grow more rapidly in grace without having to “unlearn” much of what others have learned.

Spurgeon expands on this last benefit:

“The scars and bleeding sores which come of having spent years in the service of the devil are missed by those whom the Lord brings into His church before they have wandered far into the world.”

The benefits of salvation are clear to those who have been saved.  As someone who came Jesus later in life (at aged 30), I understand that God had a reason for waiting until that point in my life to draw me to him.  On the other hand, I sometimes find myself wondering how things in my life would be different had I come to Christ earlier in life.

As one final benefit of an early belief in Christ, Spurgeon notes that oftentimes it is the light of faith in a child that will help to bring older individuals to faith:

“By a certain secret power it opens closed doors, and turns the key in the lock of unbelief. Where nothing else could win a way for truth, a child’s love has done it.”

The benefits of a child coming to Christ early in life are clear. As workers in Children’s Ministry, we should never adopt the attitude that says “what we are teaching them now will help in their coming to Christ later in life.”  Instead our goal with these children should be immediate salvation.

Links to Complete Text

If you’re interested in reading the complete text of “Come Ye Children,” it can be found on at: http://www.spurgeon.org/misc/cyc.htm

The complete text of Chapter Eighteen can be found at: http://www.spurgeon.org/misc/cyc18.htm

<<LAST TIME: Chapter 17 – Witnesses for God Converted in Youth

Chapter 19 – Obadiah and Elijah: NEXT TIME>>

Return to the Come Ye’ Children (A Synopsis) index page.

Related posts:

1. Obadiah and Elijah (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 19)
2. Witnesses for God Converted in Youth (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 17)
3. Abijah’s “Some Good Thing” II (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 21)

In the introduction to the book Jared Kennedy, the Children’s Minister at Sojourn Community Church writes,

“God intended the home to be the front line of ministry to children – not the Sunday school or public church gathering alone.  The church and the home are partners.”

Accordingly, many of the practices which we find included in an adult Sunday worship service should correspond to normal everyday practices in the home.  This book brings those practices to the forefront by juxtaposing the church against the home on adjacent pages.  Ultimately, this book was written to teach young children the truth that their home should be like a little church where Dad teaches them the Word of God and instills a biblical worldview.  In actuality, it also serves as a great reminder to us Dad’s of what God calls us to do in our God-given role and husband, father and pastor of our family.  Written in engaging rhyme that will keep young minds captivated, this book contrasts the roles and practices of the church with those of the family.  The second page summarizes the entire point of the book,

“We pray and praise God at our house.
He makes our family glad.
Our home is like a little church.
The pastor is my Dad.”

Successive pages cover such important topics as:

• Reading God’s Word to our kids
• Worshiping and praising God through music and song
• Our redemption through the death of Christ
• Prayer
• Leading kids in their walk with Jesus

At just shy of 300 words in total, this book makes a critical point in easy language that kids can understand and parents will appreciate.  The whimsical font and great illustrations make it fun to read and captivating to kids.  My two, almost three year old, made me read it to him no less than four times in a row the night it came in the mail.  My seven year old daughter and nine year old boy both really enjoyed it as well.  My sincere prayer is that every father in the church would have the opportunity to read this book and learn from it.  Further, I pray that every child, with and without an earthly father, could learn from this book how their houses should run.  Lindsay Blair, Bobby Giles, Tessa James and Sojourn have done a great service to the worldwide church in producing this book.

But, don’t just take our word for it.  Here is what others are saying about this book:

One of the most  important features of a father’s leadership in his home is his responsibility to train his children in the Scriptures and the Christian faith, and to  nurture them in knowing and loving God.  In this sense, fathers are  pastors (i.e., shepherds) to their  children, and they would do well to embrace this truth as their own.  Our Home is like a Little Church helps both children and fathers see some of the beauty and richness of this relationship.  How good it will be when an increasing number of Christian fathers own their roles as their family’s pastors.  May this little book  be used by God to serve that end -- Bruce A. Ware, Professor of  Christian Theology, The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary, Louisville, KY

Our Home is like a Little Church beautifully illustrates the Biblical role that each father is called to play  in the lives of his children.  The apostle Paul states in 1 Thessalonians 2 that he has dealt with the Thessalonian church the same way that a father deals with his children….”encouraging, comforting and urging [them], to live lives worthy of God.”  I pray that every father that reads this powerful  little book will have the courage to lead his family to live life for the  Glory of God and nothing less.  I LOVE the book because it provides a  beautiful picture of what it looks like for a father to be the spiritual leader in the home.  It simplifies this profound truth in a way that can be easily understood by everyone in the family. - Jason Houser, Seeds Family Worship, Nashville, TN

“This little gem waters the beginning seeds of a Christian worldview by intertwining ideas that could easily remain separate in the mind of a child–and all too often, our own thinking. Each spread opens to a simple yet profound comparison of events and principles learned at church that extend to the home and back again. Child-like drawings and a rhyming rhythm hold great appeal for young readers and listeners, while reminding adults that worship is not just restricted to the adult realm. Every father should read and reread this book to his children, to encourage him to fulfill his calling as a Pastor-Daddy by the grace of God.” -- Westminster Bookstore

“This grand truth [of father as "pastor" of the home] seems so far removed from the common Christian worldview that a book like this is necessary not just to introduce 3-year-olds to the idea, but their dads as well.” -- Counsel on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood, Gender Blog

Here is a video with more information on book:

www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vy2luDD661Y

For more information on the book, please check out the following pages:

• Sojourn’s Page Dedicated to the Book
• Christian Focus Publications
• Our Home is Like A Little Church on Amazon
• Our Home is Like A Little Church from Westminster Book Store

Thank you to Sojourn Community Church who was kind enough to provide me with a complimentary copy of this book in order to participate in this book blog tour.  As with all other reviews on this sight, the fact that the book was provided to me free of charge has not in any impacted my review.

Related posts:

1. A Review of Collaborate: Family + Church
2. Collaborate: Family + Church (A Synopsis of Chapters 28 – 35)
3. Collaborate: Family + Church (A Synopsis of Chapters 10 – 18)

Although this chapter touches on those who come to faith early in life, Spurgeon’s principle point in this chapter is that God is forever sovereign and always has a plan.  This chapter is based on the story of Elijah and Obadiah recorded in the book of 1 Kings and lays the foundation for the following chapter’s discussion of Obadiah’s early piety.

In 1 Kings 18, we read the story of Elijah and Obadiah.  Obadiah was in charge of the household of Ahab, the King of Israel.  When Ahab’s wife Jezebel ordered that all the prophets of the Lord be killed in order to expedite that worship of Baal, Obadiah hid a hundred of the prophets of the Lord in caves around the country  He watched over them and sustained them with bread and water.  As Obadiah was walking through the land, he came across the great prophet Elijah who summoned him to go tell King Ahab the Elijah was there to meet him.  Obadiah was understandably nervous about this request of Elijah was an enemy of the King.

Spurgeon notes that Obadiah was a quiet man of God who feared the Lord and still worked in the court of the King which was hostile to the God of Israel.  On the other hand, Elijah was a very outspoken and public prophet of the Lord.  In Spurgeon’s opinion, Elijah did not think very highly of Obadiah.  Spurgeon postulates:

“I suppose it was because this man of iron, this prophet of fire and thunder, this mighty servant of the Most High, set small store by anybody who did not come to the front and fight like himself. I know it is the tendency of brave and zealous minds somewhat to undervalue quiet, retired piety.”

Obadiah’s quiet nature likely didn’t sit well with Elijah who publicly proclaimed the Word of God.  Nonetheless, when Elijah needed to talk to Ahab, he found himself calling upon the much more timid Obadiah for assistance.  Spurgeon points out that it is often “the tendency of brave and zealous minds somewhat to undervalue quiet, retired piety.”  Spurgeon draws two lessons from this story:

1. God will never leave himself without a witness in this world.  Even in the most unlikely of places he left himself with a witness in the form of Obadiah in the court of a hostile King.
2. Never be surprised to meet a believer anywhere you might find yourself.  In Spurgeon’s words, “Grace can live where you would never expect to see it survive for an hour.”

Spurgeon points to other biblical examples of God’s grace showing up in the most unlikely of places:

1. Joseph feared God in the court of Pharaoh.
2. Daniel was a trusted counselor of Nebuchadnezzer.
3. Mordecai waited at the gate of Ahasuerus.
4. Pilate’s wife pleaded for the life of Jesus.
5. The saints in Caesar’s house found Jesus through the preaching of Paul.

Spurgeon notes that “these witnesses for God are very often persons converted in their youth” and that God seems to take a certain amount of delight in making those who came to faith early his standard-bearers.  The list of examples from the Bible is not inconsequential:

• Samuel
• David
• Joseph
• Daniel

This chapter is not primarily about children.  However, it teaches us important lessons about the grace and sovereignty of God.  In the following chapter, Spurgeon moves forward in the story of Elijah and Obadiah to review the early piety of Obadiah.

Links to Complete Text

If you’re interested in reading the complete text of “Come Ye Children,” it can be found on at: http://www.spurgeon.org/misc/cyc.htm

The complete text of Chapter Seventeen can be found at: http://www.spurgeon.org/misc/cyc17.htm

<<LAST TIME: Chapter 16 – Childhood and Holy Scripture

Chapter 18 – Obadiah’s Early Piety: NEXT TIME>>

Return to the Come Ye’ Children (A Synopsis) index page.

Related posts:

1. Obadiah and Elijah (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 19)
2. Obadiah’s Early Piety (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 18)
3. Abijah’s “Some Good Thing” (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 20)

In this chapter, Spurgeon employs the example of Paul and Timothy to draw some conclusions about children and the Bible.  He begins by recounting the method how Paul taught Timothy the gospel.  He taught him the lessons of the Bible verbally by teaching him sound doctrine.  As importantly, he taught him experientially by allowing Timothy to see Paul live out his Christian faith in everyday life.  As Spurgeon explains,

“We cannot force truth upon men, but we can make our own teaching clear and decided, and make our lives consistent therewith. Truth and holiness are the surest antidotes to error and unrighteousness.”

As teachers of children, it is of the utmost importance that we lead lives consistent with what we teach.  If our kids see us outside of the classroom setting violating the very standards that we teach them on Sunday morning, they will never follow those standards again.  We are supposed to shine the light of Jesus on them by imitating hm.  Teaching the Word of God is as much about living it as it is about speaking it.

So, why endeavor to teach children about the Bible?  In his second letter to Timothy, Paul told the young man:

“But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have firmly believed, knowing from whom you learned it” [2 Timothy 3:14 ESV]

Having a knowledge of the scriptures from youth served as a safeguard for Timothy, and Paul understood that.  He would later write the following to Timothy, to commend him and remind him of what he had learned:

“…and how from childhood you have been acquainted with the sacred writings, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus.” [2 Timothy 3:15 ESV]

Spurgeon observes that this knowledge of Scripture from youth serves the child well later in life.  Knowing God’s word at a young age allows God to use them in the spiritual battle against evil even at a very young age.  Spurgeon observes:

“One of God’s chief methods for preserving His fields from tares, is to sow them early with wheat.”

Spurgeon notes that this verse indicates that Timothy knew the scripture “from childhood.”  Spurgeon observes that this language does not refer to a grown child or even a youth, but a child just out of infancy.  The point is clear.  We should not wait to begin teaching scripture to kids.  There is no age which is too early.  As soon as children are capable of understanding and learning practically anything, they are capable of understanding the Bible.  Indeed, the Bible has been used more effectively throughout history to teach kids how to read than any other work.  Start teaching scripture to your children when they are infants.  Sing scriptures song to them.  As they become toddlers teach them easy verses to memorize.  Teach them how to read using the Bible, and encourage their own reading the Bible throughout their childhood.

As Spurgeon points out, our job as teachers is to find a way to lead the kids into the Bible – even into those areas which are so deep that even adults cannot fully understand them:

“Parts of it [the Bible] are above a child’s mind, for they are above the comprehension of the most advanced among us. There are depths in it wherein leviathan may swim; but there are also brooks in which a lamb may wade. Wise teachers know how to lead their little ones into the green pastures beside the still waters.”

Spurgeon is clearly of the opinion that working with Children is amongst the most important kingdom work a person can do.  Given that, he offers the following challenge and observation:

“Give us the first seven years of a child, with God’s grace, and we may defy the world, the flesh, and the devil to ruin that immortal soul. Those first years, while yet the clay is soft and plastic, go far to decide the form of the vessel. Do not say that your office, you who teach the young, is in the least degree inferior to ours, whose main business is with older folks, No, you have the first of them, and your impressions, as they come first, will endure last; oh, that they may be good, and only good!”

Spurgeon rightly notes that as workers in children’s ministry, we have the opportunity to teach kids and form their knowledge of God in the most formational time of their lives.  With that though, Spurgeon also offers the following words of warning:

“The teachings of our childhood leave clean-cut and sharp impressions upon the mind, which remain after seventy years have passed. Let us see that such impressions are made for the highest ends.”

With the great opportunity and teaching kids comes great responsibility.  Due to the fact that we have these kids at such an impressionable time in their lives, we must be certain that what we are writing on their minds is the truth of God and nothing else.  Finally, Spurgeon ends the chapter with some words about those who are principally responsible to teaching children about their Bibles.  Spurgeon notes that the Bible is clear who taught Timothy:

I am reminded of your sincere faith, a faith that dwelt first in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice and now, I am sure, dwells in you as well.  [2 Timothy 1:5 ESV]

Timothy’s grandmother and mother were instrumental in his teaching.  Spurgeon offers the following words of encouragement specifically for mothers:

“Those who think that a woman detained at home by her little family is doing nothing, think the reverse of what is true…Mothers, the godly training of your offspring is your first and most pressing duty. Christian women, by teaching children the Holy Scriptures, are as much fulfilling their part for the Lord, as Moses in judging Israel, or Solomon in building the temple.”

While the Bible is clear that fathers are given the responsibility for leading their families, Spurgeon reminds us of the very important role that mothers play in the spirituality of their kids.

Links to Complete Text

If you’re interested in reading the complete text of “Come Ye Children,” it can be found on at: http://www.spurgeon.org/misc/cyc.htm

The complete text of Chapter Sixteen can be found at: http://www.spurgeon.org/misc/cyc16.htm

<<LAST TIME: Chapter 15 – King David’s Two Encouragements to Parents and Teachers

Chapter 17 – Witnesses for God Converted in Youth: NEXT TIME>>

Return to the Come Ye’ Children (A Synopsis) index page.

Related posts:

1. Obadiah’s Early Piety (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 18)
2. “Come, Ye Children” – The Psalmist’s Invitation (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 14)
3. The Child Timothy and His Teachers (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 8)

Lest we should ever start to feel like our work with kids is pointless, in this short chapter, Spurgeon offers two words of encouragement to both parents and teachers for dealing with kids.  The two examples are found in the lives of David and Jesus.

Encouragement #1 – Working with Children is a Noble Endeavor

David was renowned King of Israel and author of numerous psalms.  Appointed by God in his early years, David replaced Saul and led the nation of Israel for 40 years.  Jesus was, and is, the Son of God who came to earth in human form to die on the cross to pay the price for our sins so that we could be reconcile to God forever.  One thing they shared in common was a desire to teach children.

David said:

Come, O children, listen to me; I will teach you the fear of the LORD. [Psalms 34:11 ESV]

And Jesus proclaimed:

“Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of heaven.” [Matthew 19:14 ESV]

They both had a special place in their heart for working with children.  As those involved in Children’s Ministry, we share that love of kids with David and with our Lord.  But, we are not alone in that desire.  Spurgeon provides a long list of noble people who have engaged in Children’s Ministry throughout history:

“In the United States we have heard of Presidents, of Judges, Members of Congress, and persons in the highest positions, not condescending, for I scorn to use such a term, but honouring themselves by teaching little children in Sabbath-schools. He who teaches a class in a Sabbath-school has earned a good degree. I had rather receive the title of S.S.T. than M.A., B.A., or any other honour that ever was conferred by men. Let me beg you, then, to take heart, because your duties are so honourable.”

Spurgeon points out that teaching kids is not a condescension but an honor, and we should view our work in that way.

Encouragement #2 – Be Encouraged By the Prospect of Success

Spurgeon points to the words of David, “I will teach you the fear of the Lord” and contrast it with what he might have said instead – “I might teach you the fear of the Lord.”  David seemed assured of the success of his efforts working with kids. Spurgeon suggests that those of us who work in Children’s Ministry should be encouraged by this prospect of success as well.

Spurgeon reminds us that when we get to heaven, we will finally have the opportunity to see the success of our efforts:

“Up yonder, where the starry hosts perpetually sing God’s high praises, up where the white-robed throng cast their crowns before His feet, we shall behold the success of Sabbath-schools. There, too, where infant millions assemble Sabbath after Sabbath, to sing,—

“Gentle Jesus meek and mild,”

we see with joy the success of Sabbath-schools.”

We not ever see the outcome of our work with children here on earth, but we will have the joy in heaven of seeing how our hard work has impacted the kids we have ministered to.

Finally, Spurgeon reminds us that we should be encouraged to further action by the success from our efforts that God does let us see here on earth:

“Go on with your holy service; much has been done already, but more shall yet be done. Let all your past victories inflame you with fresh ardour, let the remembrance of your triumphs in previous campaigns, and all trophies won for your Saviour on the battle-field of the past be your encouragement to press on with the duty of the present and the future.”

While it is easy to get discouraged in our efforts with God’s kids, Spurgeon reminds us of the eternal impact of our ministry.  When things in the present are not going as you hoped, looked to the past and look forward to the future.  God has given us great honor and great responsibility in working with kids.

Links to Complete Text

If you’re interested in reading the complete text of “Come Ye Children,” it can be found on at: http://www.spurgeon.org/misc/cyc.htm

The complete text of Chapter Fifteen can be found at: http://www.spurgeon.org/misc/cyc15.htm

<<LAST TIME: Chapter 14 – “Come, Ye Children”—The Psalmist’s Invitation

Chapter 16 – Childhood and Holy Scripture: NEXT TIME>>

Return to the Come Ye’ Children (A Synopsis) index page.

Related posts:

1. Instructions for Teachers and Parents (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 11)
2. The Child Timothy and His Teachers (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 8)
3. Model Lesson for Teachers (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 12)

David and the Children

In Chapter 14, Spurgeon exegetes the verse in Psalm 34 that serves as the title for this book:

“Come, O children, listen to me; I will teach you the fear of the LORD.” [Psalms 34:11 ESV]

NOTE: Spurgeon’s book was, of course, based on the wording of the King James Version of the Bible which is slightly different than the ESV Version.]

Spurgeon notes that this Psalm was written by David following the change in his behavior in front of Abimelech.  In those events, which are related in 1 Samuel 21:10-15, David pretended to be insane before the King of Gath in order to escape from him.  Spurgeon points out that, only after David had lowered himself to pretending to be a drooling madman subjected to the scorn of children did he finally discover his duty. Spurgeon explains:

“In after days, when David sang songs of praise to Jehovah, recollecting how he had become the laughing-stock of little children, he seemed to say, “Ah! by my folly before the children in the streets, I have lowered myself in the estimation of generations that shall live after me; now I will endeavour to undo the mischief,—”Come, ye children, hearken unto me: I will teach you the fear of the Lord.’”

Having once rejected the sovereign protection of the Lord in favor of scorn children, David felt compelled to teach children the true nature of God.

Fear of the Lord

The second half of Psalm 34:11 reads, “I will teach you the fear of the Lord.”  The implication is clear.  David clearly understood that Children were, and are, quite capable of grasping the doctrine of the fear of the Lord.  Spurgeon goes on to lament the unwillingness to teach the deep doctrines of God to children:

“We have heard it said by some that children cannot understand the great mysteries of religion. We even know some Sunday-school teachers who cautiously avoid mentioning the great doctrines of the gospel, because they think the children are not prepared to receive them. Alas! the same mistake has crept into the pulpit; for it is currently believed, among a certain class of preachers, that many of the doctrines of the Word of God, although true, are not fit to be taught to the people, since they would pervert them to their own destruction. Away with such priestcraft! Whatever God has revealed ought to be preached. Whatever HE has revealed, if I am not capable of understanding it, I will still believe and preach it.”

Spurgeon’s point is clear.  As teachers of the Word of God, we do not have the option to pick and choose which parts of God’s Word we want to teach.  We do not get to determine what is easy enough and what is too hard to teach to children.  Spurgeon states unequivocally, and I agree, that there is NO doctrine which a child capable of salvation is not capable of understanding.  Not only are the capable of understanding these doctrines, Spurgeon argues that oftentimes they are actually in a better position to  understand these doctrines because of their young age:

“In fact, children are capable of understanding some things in early life, which we hardly understand afterwards. Children have eminently a simplicity of faith, and simplicity of faith is akin to the highest knowledge; indeed, we know not that there is much distinction between the simplicity of a child and the genius of the profoundest mind. He who receives things simply, as a child, will often have ideas which the man who is prone to make a syllogism of everything will never attain unto.”

We should never approach Children’s Ministry or enter a classroom with an idea that the children are not capable of understanding what we are trying to teach.  As teachers, if we cannot make the children in our ministry understand a doctrine or concept or teaching, it is likely the result of our not understanding it ourselves.  In order to teach kids, we must first understand what we are trying to teach.  As teachers, if you cannot find a way to teach a child the things of God in an understandable way, we might not be fit for the task.  Spurgeon holds that if the child cannot understand a lesson, it is not the fault of the child but the fault of the teacher.  If you find yourself saying things like, “they just don’t get it” the first place you should look for a reason is in the mirror.  Frankly, I find the process of finding ways to convey the deep truths of God to young children to be one of the most exciting parts of working with kids.

On Children Being Saved

Spurgeon next turns his attention back to a frequent refrain in this book – that children are as capable, if not more so, of attaining salvation as adults.  Many people argue over the so called “Age of Accountability” – the age at which children are accountable for their actions and must accept Jesus in order to obtain eternal life.  In fact, I contributed to a Children’s Ministry Think Tank on this very subject. In terms of the age at which kids are capable of understanding the gospel, Spurgeon says:

“As soon as a child is capable of being lost, it is capable of being saved. As soon as a child can sin, that child can, if God’s grace assist it, believe and receive the Word of God. As soon as children can learn evil, be assured that they are competent, under the teaching of the Holy Spirit, to learn good.”

Many people remain suspect of kids who claim they have been saved.  Spurgeon warns that we should never look suspiciously on what he calls child-piety.  As Spurgeon points out:

“It is better sometimes to be deceived than to be the means of offending one of these little ones who believe in Jesus. God send to His people a firm belief that little buds of grace are worthy of all tender care!”

Rather than being suspicious of childhood salvation, we should rejoice in it.

Links to Complete Text

If you’re interested in reading the complete text of “Come Ye Children,” it can be found on at: http://www.spurgeon.org/misc/cyc.htm

The complete text of Chapter Fourteen can be found at: http://www.spurgeon.org/misc/cyc14.htm

<<LAST TIME: Chapter 13 – “Come, Ye Children” – Three Admonitions

Chapter 15 – King David’s Two Encouragements to Parents and Teachers: NEXT TIME>>

Return to the Come Ye’ Children (A Synopsis) index page.

Related posts:

1. King David’s Two Encouragements to Parents and Teachers (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 15)
2. Obadiah’s Early Piety (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 18)
3. Of Such Is The Kingdom of Heaven (Synopsis of Come Ye' Children – Chapter 5)

Over the last several days, I have posted a number of articles on the new book Collaborate: Family + Church. This represents the next entry in that series. Earlier entries include:

• My review of the book Collaborate: Family + Church.
• Collaborate: Family + Church (A Synopsis of Chapters 10 – 18)
• Collaborate: Family + Church (A Synopsis of Chapters 19 – 27)

28. Dr. Rob Rienow – “Building a Theology of Family Ministry”

Summary: Rob Rienow starts this chapter with the premise that family ministry is not something the church should embrace because it is the newest fad or even because it works.  He asserts that churches should adopt a family ministry approach based on a review of Biblical theology.  The point of this chapter is to demonstrate that family ministry should be built on the “inerrancy and sufficiency of scripture” and that the Great Commission is fundamentally based on the concept of family.  He then proceeds to work through both the Old and New Testaments to support 3 basic and foundational principals as follows (and I quote them from the article as I couldn’t phrase them any better):

1. God created families to be discipleship centers
2. The Biblical purpose of parenting and grand parenting is to impress the hearts of children with a love of God.
3. God has designed the family as an essential engine of world evangelization through the power of multi-generational faithfulness.

He points out that the spread of the Gospel begins with parents impressing the love of God and an appreciation of his Word on the hearts of their children.

Theologically speaking, I found this chapter to be one of the most interesting in the book.  It is definitely worth working through with this book in one hand and your Bible in the other.  I had not read anything from Rob Rienow before picking up this book, and reading this article prompted me to visit his internet site which contains additional articles which are well worth reading.

Quote: “We should not embrace a parent-centered model of ministry because it works, but rather because parent-centered, family-integrated ministry is rooted in a comprehensive Biblical theology.”

Bio: Dr. Rob Rienow is the Family Pastor at Wheaton Bible Church in Wheaton, Illinois and is the founder of Visionary Parenting.

29. Roger Fields – “Engaging Families Through Parental Involvement…Kidz Blitz Style!”

Summary: Roger Fields reflects on the Kidz Mlitz style of ministry which revolves around strategic involvement.  By involving parents in the production as more than just spectators, Roger explains that this method has a lasting impact on the whole family.

Quote: “Something happens when parents get involved in children’s ministry – it changes them.”

Bio: Roger Fields is the creator of Kid Blitz Live and the author of Big City Studio curriculum.

30. Ryan Frank – “Fighting Staff Infections”

Summary: In this chapter, Ryan Frank offers six tips for “energizing your relationship with your senior pastor.”  These include:

• Making communication with your senior pastor a priority.
• Furthering the vision of your senior pastor.
• Avoiding tunnel vision.
• Maintaining your flexibility.
• Listening between the lines.
• Understanding the learning style of your senior pastor.

In the end, it’s all about relationships, and Ryan offers great advice for building a solid relationship with your senior pastor.

Quote: “Be careful about being critical of others who don’t learn the same way you do.  God wired each of us differently.  We each learn differently, too.”

Bio: Ryan Frank is the founder of KidzMatter, Inc. and the publisher of K! Magazine.  He is the Children’s Pastor at Liverty Baptist Church in Sweetser, Indiana.

31. Sam Luce – “Building Ministry”

Summary: Sam Luce’s chapter is based on the premise that the best thing a church can do to connect with families is to “create a generational pipeline, where next generation ministries are connected in value, vision and practice.”  He notes that in children’s ministry we invest tons of time and resources in the kids we minister to only to see them lost during the time from fifth grade to eighth grade.  Accordingly, Sam points to the health of the youth ministry in his church as a guide for the health of the Children’s Ministry and suggests that it is important that these groups work together in the spiritual development of the children in their church.  He provides some practical ideas for sharing resources between children’s and youth ministries as sharing volunteers, sharing money and spending time together.

Sam views the role of the church and children’s ministry as providing parents with the tools they need to strengthen their families.  He suggests that the times when parents are most open to partnering with the church is during times of transition.  Sam notes that the times when they were losing the most kids was the transition to kindergarten and to the seventh grade.  In order to counteract these losses, Redeemer Church split the 5^th and 6^th grade unit off from the remainder of the children’s ministry and involved parents in the transition process.  By involving parents in this transitional process at church, the church comes alongside of the parents to help them at a time of great transition in their children’s lives.  As Sam points out, it is during these times of transition that parents are most open to ideas and suggestions.

I have always enjoyed reading Sam’s blog and his articles in K! Magazine.  His writings are always insightful and never fail to get me thinking about some aspect of my work in children’s ministry.  This article was no exception.  I work closely with Kindergarteners as they make that transition from preschool ministry to children’s ministry.  I have always viewed that as a significant transition for the kids and approached it as such.  Sam’s article has challenged me to think about how we can take advantage of that transition to assist parents, provide them with tools and assist them with this transition.

Quote: “One of the measuring sticks I use to gauge the effectiveness of our kids’ ministry is by the health of our youth ministry.”

Bio: Sam Luce is the Children’s Pastor at Redeemer Church in Utica, New York and a contributing editor to K! Magazine.

32. Steve Dilla – “The Small Conquering the Big”

Summary: Steve Dilla begins this chapter by pointing out that the small seems to be replacing the big in our culture today.  He notes that the Bible is full of examples of the small conquering the big.  He notes that we should dream big no matter what size we currently are because you can’t out dream God.

That concepts introduces the main point of this chapter which is that it is important to pay attention to the small things, and when it comes to ministry, one of the most important small things is margin.  Steve notes that we can only minister to others out of the overflow, and if we leave ourselves no margin in our lives, there will be no overflow to give.  Through a compelling personal testimony, he makes the point that it is critical that we take intentional steps to keep from becoming overwhelmed in ministry and burning out.

Quote: “Try as hard as you want; you can’t out dream God.”

“God moves regardless of what we say or do, but nothing in all of His creation changes, grows or moves unless you give it space.”

Bio: Steve Dilla previously served as the Preschool Director and Elevate Jr. Producer at Fellowship Church’s Grapevine Campus through the Autumn of 2009.  He and his wife are currently developing plans for a new church in New York.

33. Steve Young – “Young at Heart”

Summary: Steve Young looks at the most important commandment in scripture to love the Lord your God with all your heart and all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.  Jesus affirmed this as the most important command in scripture and, as such, it is critical that we, as parents, pass it along with other scripture to our kids.

Quote: “…to truly grasp all of God’s Word seems impossible.  Where should I start?  What should I focus on?  What’s most important?”

Bio: Steve Young is a Children’s Minister at Southeast Christian Church in Louisville, Kentucky.

34. Timothy Smith – “Living the Shema as a Dad”

Summary: Timothy Smith explores how to implement the Shema (found in Deuteronomy 6) in our family lives.  Implementation of the Shema in our everyday family lives includes six basic principles.  First, write down what you want to impress upon your children’s hearts.  Secondly, impress those things first upon your own heart, then upon theirs.  Finally, integrate the four behaviors mandated by the Shema including talking as you sit at home, walking in the street, when you get up and when you go to sleep.  The fourth principal is repetition.  Finally, we must employ all means possible in teaching our kids including all five senses.

Quote: “To talk at home, you have to be at home, you have to be available, you have to focus and so do your kids.”

Bio: Timothy Smith is a Family Coach, author and speaker who lives in Thousand Oaks, California.

35. Yancy Richmond – “Music: The Language Everyone Speaks”

Summary: Yancy Richmond writes about the power of music in our lives.  She notes that by the time he average person is 18 years old, they have more than 10,000 songs in their head.  The power of music can be harnessed to create environments in your church classrooms and activities.  She postulates that music is one of the biggest areas where we can connect with kids.

Yancy notes that kids learn best when their parents are also engaged in worship.  Accordingly, she suggests that it important that songs parents know also be incorporated into children’s worship times.  She also encourages kids’ worship leaders to stick with it.  Just because kids don’t “get it” right away doesn’t mean that they won’t in the long term.

Quote: “They will sing, but you have to give them the opportunity.  They will participate, but you have to use relevant songs that are made to connect kids to God.  They will worship, but you have to teach them how.”

Bio: Yancy Richmond is a nationally known artist, songwriter and worship leader for kids.

Related posts:

1. Collaborate: Family + Church (A Synopsis of Chapters 10 – 18)
2. Collaborate: Family + Church (A Synopsis of Chapters 19 – 27)
3. Collaborate: Family + Church (A Synopsis of Chapters 1 – 9)

Over the last several days, I have posted a number of articles on the new book Collaborate: Family + Church. This represents the next entry in that series. Earlier entries include:

• My review of the book Collaborate: Family + Church.
• Collaborate: Family + Church (A Synopsis of Chapters 10 – 18)

19. Kenny Conley – “Reinventing Baptism”

Summary: Kenny Conley’s article provides interesting insights into what his church is doing in the area of baptism to get families more involved in the spiritual development of their children.  Kenny notes that the best chance a child has at long-term spiritual growth is when the parent takes a leadership role in that process.

He offers a variety of statistics regarding the alarming rate at which children are dropping out of the church as they grow up, and concludes that children’s ministry in its current form is failing children.  He notes that the advent of dedicated children’s ministry is a relatively current phenomena and that for hundreds of years values, principals and a biblical worldview were transferred and passed along from generation to generation without the existence of children’s ministries as we know them today.

Next, Kenny points out that while a vast majority of parents accept that they are responsible for the guiding their children’s spiritual journey, most have abdicated that responsibility and turned it over to the church.

Kenny’s church has capitalized on baptism as a significant event in a child’s life where parents are willing to get involved.  They use this opportunity involved parents in their child’s spiritual journey and come alongside and teach and equip the parents to continue, or start, in their role as spiritual guide.  In order to accomplish this, parents are involved in three critical steps related to Baptism at Gateway Church.  First, parents are actively involved in the baptism classes.  Secondly, they follow-up with the parents after the class is over.  Finally, parents are encouraged to actually baptize their children themselves.  All of these steps help to get parents intricately involved in this momentous occasion in their children’s lives.

In this article, Kenny provides solid practical advice on how to get parents involved in the baptism process.  In addition, I found that reading his article started me thinking about other “moments” in a child’s life where the church can actively seek to engage parents in the spiritual journey of their children.

Quote: “Children’s ministry is broken.  At the surface, the numbers look good, but reality says that we’re mainly producing dysfunctional believers.”

Bio: Kenny Conley is the Next Gen Pastor at Gateway Church in Austin, Texas.

20. Team Kidmo – “Church DNA: How Church Culture Impacts the Initiative”

Summary: In this article, Team Kidmo reminds us that, in evaluating any strategy, it is important to understand and account for the culture of your local church.   Understanding that culture and your church’s personality will help to determine which initiatives are more or less likely to “click” with your church.  Just because something works at one church is not a guarantee that will work at your church.

Quote: “One key to success lies in carefully and prayerfully choosing initiatives that fit within the established culture and initiatives of your church.”

Bio: Team Kidmo is a collection of ministry and broadcast professionals whose goal is to create ministry resources which are media-driven including the KIDMO curriculum.

21. Matt Markins – “Paramount Parenting”

Summary: Matt Markins tackles the paramount question when it comes to being a parent – “who will my boys become?”  As Matt explains, it is this question that drives him to know God to impress the love of God upon his kids.  Based on the words of Deuteronomy 6, he explains the God gives us three reminders to cut through the clutter of everyday life.  First, love God.  Second, value of understand God’s Word.  Third, and finally, teach God’s Word to your kids.  In this chapter, Matt stresses the importance of modeling a good relationship with God for our kids.  If we want them to pursue God, they must see us pursuing God.  If we want them to have a passion for God’s word, we must show them our passion for God’s Word.  Finally, Matt explains that we must resist the cultural temptation to engage in the fast pace of today’s culture.  Trying to keep up with that pace robs family of quality time.

Quote: “Research has shown repeatedly that the connection between parents and their kids is broken down due to the pace of life and the culture in which we live in North America.”

Bio: Matt Markins is one of the founders of the D6 conference and Director of sales and marketing for Randall House and D6 Family.

22. Matt McKee – “Environment Changes that Need Changing”

Summary: In this article, Matt McKee contrasts the pros and cons of high priced eye-catching but unchangeable kids’ spaces with the lower cost, interchangeable less professional looking do-it-yourself options.  He calls for kidmin space designer to find a way to create interchangeable and affordable spaces without sacrificing the quality of professionally designed spaces.

Quote: “I can’t stand walking into a church and seeing beige walls with tiny signs where little to no effort has been put into the space for children , then going into the adult space, which is all decked out with eye-pleasing graphics and banners.”

Bio: Matt McKee is the Pastor of Students and Children at Horizon Community Church in Cincinnati, Ohio.

23. Michelle Romain – “Family Fitness”

Summary: In this chapter, Michelle Romain compares teaching our kids about good health to teaching them about God.  Michelle shares information about the Shapin’ Up Fitness Camp she created.

Quote: “Research has proven repeatedly that children are able to learn the most and the development of their character is most impacted before they reach their teen years.  This applies to education, religion, health and more.”

Bio: Michelle Romain is the creator of Shapin’ Up Fitness Camp.  She is also director for the American Children’s Minister’s Association.

24. Nevan Hooker – “Double It”

Summary: In this short article, Nevan Hooker encourages us to examine what is and isn’t working, latch on to the good, let go of the bad, and to set audacious goals.  Although this article is short, it serves as a great reminder to set God-sized goals.

Quote: “Examine these areas and evaluate why things are working.  Then focus your resources and energy on those areas.  It might be time to let go of other things that just aren’t working.”

Bio: Nevan Hooker currently serves at Southeast Christian Church in Louisville, Kentucky.

25. Pat Verbal – “God’s Heart for Families Affected by Special Needs”

Summary: In this article, Pat Verbal looks at the importance of churches establishing special needs ministries and the general lack of such ministries in the church today.  I was struck by the statistics included in this chapter regarding the general lack of special needs ministries in churches today.

Quote: “An estimated 80 percent of families affected by disability do not regularly attend church.  One reason may be that less than 15 percent of U.S. churches have an intentional disability ministry.”

Bio: Pat Verbal is the Manager of Curriculum Development at the Christian Institute on Disability at Joni and Friends International Disability Center.

26. Reggie Joiner – “Where Do You Start”

Summary: Reggie Joiner has become the “point man” when it comes to the Orange concept.  If you haven’t read his book Think Orange, you should run to your local bookstore and buy it today.

The Orange idea is based on the concept:

“…that two combined influences will have a greater impact than either of the two influences alone.”

In other words, parents (represented by the color red) combine with the church (represented by the color yellow) create the combined influence of orange which together has a far greater impact on the spiritual lives of children.  Reggie defines family ministry as “synchronizing church leaders and parents around a master plan to build faith and character in their sons and daughters.”

This concept is based on three critical assumptions.  The first assumption is that there is nothing more important in life than a person personal relationship with God.  The second assumption is that parents have more potential than anyone else to influence the spiritual lives of their children.  The third, and final, critical assumption is that no one is in a better position to influence and help parents in that goal than the church.

The remainder of this chapter provides practical information on how to implement the Orange strategy and is a great synopsis of Reggie’s Think Orange book.  Unfortunately, a summary of that information is beyond the scope of this synopsis.

This chapter serves a great introduction to both the Orange concept specifically and family ministry in general.  If you pick up this book and are not familiar with family ministry, I would start with this chapter.

Quote: “From our point of view as Orange leaders, family ministry is ‘synchronizing church leaders and parents around a master plan to build faith and character in their sons and daughters.’”

Bio: Reggie Joiner is founder and CEO of the reThink and was one of the founding pastors of North Point Community Church in Alpharetta, Georgia.

27. Rob Bradbury – “Selling Out – Sold Out”

Summary: Rob Bradbury from Planetshakers Church in Melbourne, Australia reflects on how there Friday Night Live events went from a program attracting 40 children a week to more than a 1,000 parents and children.  He identifies seven steps in the process including prayer, advertising, a family club, expanded efforts, surveying parents, quickly moving from phase to phase, and locking in their efforts.  Rob provides an inspiring story of what can happen when you think big and rely on God.

Quote: “I believe the local kids’ program is one of the best-kept secrets in the community.”

Bio: Rob Bradbury is the Family Pastor at Planetshakers City Church in Melbourne, Australia.

Related posts:

1. Collaborate: Family + Church (A Synopsis of Chapters 28 – 35)
2. Collaborate: Family + Church (A Synopsis of Chapters 10 – 18)
3. Collaborate: Family + Church (A Synopsis of Chapters 1 – 9)

Over the last several days, I have posted a number of articles on the new book Collaborate: Family + Church. This represents the next entry in that series. Earlier entries include:

• My review of the book Collaborate: Family + Church.

10. Gina McClain – “I Hate Homework!”

Summary: Gina McClain argues that our job in children’s ministry is to help parents develop a vision for their children.  If parents do not have a godly vision for their children, it will not matter how many tools and resources we give them to help them lead their children spiritually.  Without a vision, such tools and resources will often go unused.

Gina explains that when parents do not intentionally develop a vision for their kids, they will inevitably adopt the vision the culture holds for their kids.  She explains that the vision that today’s culture has for kids is what she calls the “well-rounded child.”  This can alternately be called the “self-focused” child.  This child believes that the world and everything in it exists for their personal benefit.  To combat this, parents must develop a God-sized vision for their kids that teaches them to focus on God rather than themselves.

Gina suggests Child Dedication as the appropriate time to begin helping parents to develop a vision for their kids.  What better time to instill a vision than the beginning.  She notes that the benefit of establishing this vision early is that it allows parents to “push through” those times in parenting where they hit the wall of parenting.   On a positive note, Gina points out that we do not need to convince parents that they need help, they already know they need help.  If we assist them in casting a God-sized vision for their families, then the resources we give them will be welcomed as a means of moving in the direction of that vision.

Quote: “I don’t believe the challenge confronting parents today is lack of right information – it’s a lack of right vision.”

“Parenting is a marathon not a sprint.  In ministry, it’s dangerous to assume parents understand this concept.”

Bio: Gina McClain currently serves as Children’s Ministry Director at Faithpromise Church in Knoxville, Tennessee.

11. Heather Wimsett – “Proverbs 16”

Summary: Heather Wimsett shares her story about the importance of answering God’s call to go to Romania and serving him by just showing up.  This article is a sobering reminder that sometimes God calls us just to be in a certain place and not to do anything spectacular.

Quote: “I realize that God didn’t call me because of my experience, my language skills, my success or my knowledge.  He called me for my obedience.”

Bio: Heather Wimsett was a missionary to Romania for seven years.  She is currently an Occupational Therapist and is the volunteer coordinator for Thru the Roof, the disability ministry of College Heights Christian Church.

12. Jason Houser – “Our Journey”

Summary: Jason Houser’s article provides a little insight and background into what Seeds Family Worship is (a group who sets scripture to catchy music) and why they were formed.  From there, he moves on to the importance of equipping parents to be the worship leader for their families.  As Mr. Houser points out, most parents don’t feel equipped to lead their families spiritually  because for the most part they have not seen that role modeled.

I believe that, as parents, modeling faith in Jesus Christ is the single most important thing we can for our kids.  No matter how many times we read them Bible stories, how many church activities they are involved in, or how much time we spend trying to look righteous, kids will learn what they see us living out.  It what they see is a life of active faith and trust in the Lord Jesus Christ, that is what they will lean towards.

If you are not familiar with the work of Seeds Family Worship, I encourage you to check it out.  I have featured them several times here on Dad in the Middle.  They have successfully set numerous scriptures to music which is enjoyable to listen to for both parents and kids.  I know, in my own life, there are verses I cannot read without the tune of a Seeds Family Worship song running through my head.

Quote: “I have known for a long time that music is such an amazing gift from God, and we are wired to connect with it on a spiritual level.”

Bio: Jason Houser is the worship leader for the group Seed Family Worship at Harpeth Community Church in Franklin, Tennessee.

13. Jeremy Hall – “Connecting Youth Ministry With Families”

Summary: Bannock Baptist Church has established a series of “Breakthroughs” to guide parents in understanding where their kids should be spiritually at any given age.  Jeremy Hall writes from the perspective of the youth ministry which encompasses three of Bannock Baptist’s Breakthrough milestones.  Those include the “Purity Breakthrough,” “Ownership Breakthrough,” and “Conviction Breakthrough.”  The ultimate goal of the whole program is to help kids develop into to youth who eventually take ownership of their own faith.  Families are involved in each Breakthrough in through things as simple as e-mails, questions provided to parents and Breakthrough classes.

Quote: “As you can see, communicating with parents can be quite easy.  Simply take what you are already doing and dream up new ways to inform and involve parents.”

Bio: Jeremy Hall is Student Ministries Pastor at Bannockburn Baptist Church in Austin, Texas.

14. Jim Kast-Keat – “First Voice, Second Voice: Partnering With The Parents of Preteens”

Summary: Jim Kast-Keats writes about pre-teen ministry to 10, 11 and 12 year olds.  He notes that this is a time in their lives when they are going through major changes both physically and socially.  He notes that pre-teens need a unique ministry to grow and change with them as they work through this transitional period.  As with all age groups, Jim points out that the “First Voice” in kids’ lives during this period should be their parents which should be the most influential voice.  The role of pre-teen ministry is to be the “Second Voice” in the lives of these kids.  The role of “Second Voice” is held by anyone who spends time with the kids.  Jim suggests that one way to help the “Second Voice” to reinforce the “First Voice” is to ask parents of preteens what they would like said to their kids and holding parent forums to listen to parents.

Quote: “It is during this time that everything in a preteen’s life, world and worldview begins to change, leaving them ready for their next step or desperately scrambling for their last.  With only a decade of experience behind them, life now seems to have pulled its anchor, leaving a preteen floating aimlessly through a sea of change and transition.”

Bio: Jim Kast-Keat leads the fifth and sixth grade ministry at Mars Hill Bible Church in Grand Rapids, Michigan.

15. Jim Wideman – “The Missing Piece – Developing a Biblical World View In Your Children”

Summary: With all due respect to the other authors in this book, this chapter resonated with me more than any other, and I struggled to keep this synopsis a summary rather than a recapitulation of the entire chapter.  That said, there is a plan for a more detailed chapter-by-chapter review/study of this book, and have put in a request for this chapter.  I hope to expand on this synopsis at that point because I feel this article contains information can change families and help children on their spiritual paths.  Of all the great information in this book, I think I gained more from this chapter, and was more personally convicted by it, than any other chapter.

In this chapter, Jim chronicles his journey “to know God and love His Word and help sons and daughters to do the same.”  Jim starts this chapter with his story of how he was “called” to children’s ministry quite by accident despite his best efforts not to be.  He writes about how his view of children’s ministry changed when he began to look at children, and ministering to them, through the lens of the Bible.  He notes that many ministries and families today lack a biblical worldview, and both the church and the family need a biblically based vision for reaching children.

Jim explains that in raising their two daughters, he and his wife encouraged them to make choices by asking “What does the Bible say?”  He offers his top ten list of things to do as a parents or children’s ministry worker to instill a biblical worldview in kids.  They include:

1. Be open and honest with your kids about everything.
2. Model behavior for your kids.
3. Teach principals rather than just facts.
4. Teaching children that wisdom is more important than wealth or fame.
5. Teach kids the difference between truth and what they see on TV.
6. Teach them that the Bible is the Word of God and holds the answers for everything in life.
7. Jesus is the only way.
8. Point out wrong thinking wherever you note it.
9. Let your kids see you reading the Bible and quote it to them.
10. Instill in kids the importance of being at and participating in church.

Jim concludes this chapter with a challenge to us all: “Same actions bring same results.  What are you going to start doing differently?”

Quote: “I realized early in my ministry that children couldn’t live what they couldn’t remember, and they couldn’t remember what they didn’t understand.”

“God’s word is the filter through which we should view the world!”

“The No. 1 mistake in teaching the Bible to children is to fill them up with facts instead of instilling in them the principals of each story and teaching.”

Bio: Jim Wideman is an icon in the world of Children’s Ministry.  He is the Associate Pastor of Next Generation at World Outreach Church in Murfreesboro, Tennessee.  He actively mentors younger children’s pastors and is a proficient author and speaker.

16. Jonathan Cliff – “How to Offer a Truly Family-Friendly Event”

Summary: In this chapter, Jonathan Cliff explores the idea of churches putting on family-friendly events for families with no “overt spiritual message.”  Jonathan argues that in today’s day and age of running from event to event where parents become spectators, real quality family time is lacking.  He offers three keys to putting on a family-friendly event.  These include encouraging it to be family-friendly, providing workers so that families can take advantage of the event and making it affordable.

One things that Jonathan hit on that I think is critical is finding workers to work these events who are not the “usual suspects.”  So often in children’s and youth ministry, there is a core group of people who lead the ministry and plan and run every event.  Where these people have families, it is important to find other people to work the event so that they can enjoy time with their families as well.

Quote: “What would it look like if the church could create events that had no spiritual implications beyond bringing dads and moms together with their kids?”

Bio: Jonathan Cliff is Children’s Ministry Pastor at Trinity Church in Lubbock, Texas.

17. Joyce Oglesby – “Family Nourishment”

Summary: In this article Joyce Oglesby offers practical examples of things she has done as a pastor’s wife to open her home to congregants and to mentor young women.  While this article was not particularly relevant to me (I am not a pastor’s wife J), I do appreciate Ms. Oglesby’s attempts to share her wisdom and experience with a younger generation of women.  Also, anyone can take away from this article the importance of showing hospitality.

Quote: “While you’re providing them with the mere rations for life, offer up God’s nourishing sustenance for eternity.”

Bio: Joyce Oglesby is the founder and president of Beyond This Point Ministries.

18. Justyn Smith – “PJ’s All Star Leadership Program”

Summary: Justyn Smith also tackles the issue of measuring the spiritual maturity of children at different stages of life.  Based on non-Christian organizations like karate schools and scouts, Justyn’s church developed a leadership program for children based on a ranking system.  The system known as PJ’s (Pastor Justyn’s) All Stars offers five levels of leadership to kids who demonstrate their progression along a spiritual journey.  Each level is marked by a color and a set of criteria to attain that level.  The levels are all built around five core values including Influence, Heart, Creativity, Wisdom and Servanthood.

Quote: “One of the biggest challenges for children’s pastors and leaders is gauging the spiritual development and maturation of children.”

Bio: Justyn Smith is Children’s and Internship Pastor at The Church at South Las Vegas in Henderson, Nevada and was the coordinator of the well known Napkin Conference.

Related posts:

1. Collaborate: Family + Church (A Synopsis of Chapters 28 – 35)
2. Collaborate: Family + Church (A Synopsis of Chapters 19 – 27)
3. Collaborate: Family + Church (A Synopsis of Chapters 1 – 9)

1. It will help me to organize my thoughts and have a plan for what I intend to read; and
2. I hope it will help to ease my wife’s concern that I continue to buy tons and tons of books and never read them.  See, honey, I have a plan!

So, here is what I plan to be reading in 2010:

Books Written to or for Children

• Letters to Children…by C.S. Lewis
• To the Rising Generation: Addresses Given to Children and Young Adults…By Jonathan Edwards
• A Good Start: A Book for Young Men and Women…by C.H. Spurgeon
• Jesus Is Alive! Evidence for the Resurrection, Children’s Edition…by Josh McDowell & Sean McDowell
• The Case for Faith for Kids…by Lee Strobel
• The Case for a Creator for Kids…by Lee Strobel
• 99 Questions God’s Answers For Kids

Books Related to Children’s and Family Ministry

• Shift: What it takes to finally reach families today…by Brian Haynes
• Formational Children’s Ministry: Shaping Children Using Story, Ritual, and Relationship…by Ivy Beckwith
• Comforting Children in Crisis…Group Publishing
• The Ultimate Survival Guide For Children’s Ministry Workers…by Ivy Beckwith
• What Every Sunday School Teacher Should Know…by Elmer Towns

Books About Teaching

• Rock Solid Teacher: Discover the Joy of Teaching Like Jesus…by Gregory C. Carlson
• Created to Learn…by William R. Yount
• Teaching Kids About God…by John Trent

Parenting

• Parenting With Love And Logic…by Foster Cline and Jim Fay
• Parenting Teens With Love And Logic…by Foster Cline and Jim Fay

Theology

• Systematic Theology: An Introduction to Biblical Doctrine…by Wayne Grudem
• The Prodigal God: Recovering the Heart of the Christian Faith…by Timothy Keller
• Your Own Jesus: A God Insistent on Making It Personal…by Mark Hall

Devotional

• Morning and Evening…by Charles H. Spurgeon
• Big Truths for Little Kids: Teaching Your Children to Live for God…by Susan Hunt

Biography

• Me, Myself & Bob: A True Story About Dreams, God, and Talking Vegetables…by Phil Vischer

Fiction

I don’t read a lot of fiction as a general rule, but this year I’ve already started reading the Chronicles of Narnia series to my kids.

• The Magician’s Nephew…by C.S. Lewis
• The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe…by C.S. Lewis
• The Horse and His Boy…by C.S. Lewis
• Prince Caspian…by C.S. Lewis
• The Voyage of the Dawn Treader…by C.S. Lewis
• The Silver Chair…by C.S. Lewis
• The Last Battle…by C.S. Lewis

So, there we have it – my planned reading list for 2010, and its only 30 books.  We’ll see how it goes!  For the record, and for my wife’s peace of mind, I only need to buy one of the books on this list.  That book is Me, Myself & Bob which I haven’t gotten around to buying yet.  If you have one laying around, feel free to mail it to me!  I already have all the others.  What are you reading this year?

Related posts:

1. #17 – Read About Teaching (Tips For Large Group Teaching)
2. #44 – Read To Them (Tips For Large Group Teaching)
3. #9 – Big Truths for Young Hearts (Top Ten Christian Books for Kids)

In this chapter, Spurgeon offers three admonitions of particular importance to those who work with kids.  These admonitions are based on the following verse which provides the title of the book:

“Come, Ye children, hearken unto me: I will teach you the fear of the LORD. [Psalms 34:11 KJV]”

Admonition #1 – Recollect Whom You Are Teaching

Even when working with kids, perhaps especially when we are working with kids, we need to remember to respect our audience.  By respect, Spurgeon does not mean that you give people special treatment because of their status or position.  Instead, he means that we must remember that we are working with people who have souls, and we should not waste their time filling their heads with things that are not worth hearing.

Spurgeon argues that those who teach kids are in a position of greater responsibility than even those who would teach adults.  Those who minister to adults minister to people who are, at least theoretically, capable of making their own judgments and their own decisions about what they are and are not going to do.  When you teach children, they have no other option. They cannot choose, on their own, to go find a different teacher or a different church.  Accordingly, we must be all the more careful about what we teach them.  As Spurgeon explains,

“If you teach the child wrongly, he believes you; if you teach him heresies, he will receive them; what you teach him now, he will never forget. You are not sowing, as some say, on virgin soil, for it has long been occupied by the devil; but you are sowing on a soil more fertile now than it ever will be again,—soil that will produce fruit now, far better than it will do in after days; you are sowing on a young heart, and what you sow will be pretty sure to abide there, especially if you teach evil, for that will never be forgotten.”

Children are much more susceptible to what we teach them, and what they learn is likely to stick with them longer than an adult might retain it.  Spurgeon goes on to point out:

“Put poison in the spring, and it will pollute the whole stream. Take care what you are after! You are twisting the sapling, and the old oak will be bent thereby. Have a care, it is a child’s soul you are tampering with, if you are tampering at all; it is a child’s soul you are preparing for eternity, if God is with you. I give you a solemn admonition on every child’s behalf. Surely, if it be murder to administer poison to the dying, it must be far more criminal to give poison to the young life. If it be evil to mislead grey-headed age, it must be far more so to turn aside the feet of the young into the road of error, in which they may for ever walk.”

We should be always mindful of this fact and burden when we prepare to teach children.  We must prepare with an appropriate fear of the Lord in mind.  Teaching children is not something that should be taken lightly!

Admonition #2 – Recollect That You Are Teaching For God

The first admonition is to remember who you are teaching.  This second admonition is that we must remember who we are teaching for.  Working with kids is not just an exercise in baby-sitting.  Rather, you are there to teach them on behalf of the God of this Universe.  What we teach to children about God and eternal matters is immeasurably more important than anything else a child will learn:

“If you, as teachers, were only assembled to reach geography, it might not injure them eternally if you were to tell the children that the North Pole was close to the Equator; or if you were to say that the extremity of South America was hard by the coast of Europe; or if you assured them that England was in the middle of Africa. But you are not teaching geography, or astronomy, nor are you training the children for a business life in this world; but you are, to the best of your ability, teaching them for God… Wound the child’s hand if you will; but, for God’s sake, do not wound his heart. Say what you like about temporal things; but, I beseech you, in spiritual matters, take care how you lead him. Be careful that it is the truth which you inculcate, and only that. With such a responsibility, how solemn your work becomes!”

We must take care to please God in how we teach his kids.  We should tremble at the thought of doing God’s work.  It is an awesome responsibility and one that we are not capable of fulfilling absent God’s grace!

Admonition #3 – Remember That Your Children Need Teaching

Finally, we must remember that teaching children the things of God is an absolutely necessary endeavor:

“Your child needs teaching. He was born in iniquity; in sin did his mother conceive him. He has an evil heart; he knows not God, and he never will know the Lord unless he is taught.”

Unless someone teaches a child, he cannot come to a saving knowledge of God!  We must teach kids the fear of the Lord:

“Be careful, then, how you teach, remembering the urgent necessity of the case. This is not a house on fire, needing your assistance at the engine; nor is it a wreck at sea, demanding your oar in the lifeboat; but it is a deathless spirit calling aloud to you,” Come and help me.” Therefore, I beseech you, teach the fear of the Lord, and that only; be very anxious to say, and to say truly, “I will teach you the fear of the Lord.”

Finally, we must remember that in order to teach the fear of the Lord to children, we must possess it ourselves.

Personal Observations

Many in Children’s Ministry will complain that they are underappreciated or people do not take their ministry seriously.  This is likely a valid concern, but I think the bigger travesty is that there are many people in Children’s Ministry who do not take what they do seriously.  They decided that, because they are just teaching kids, they can throw something together at the last second or just “wing it” and get by.  This attitude ignores the absolute importance of kids to God!  For those of us who work with and teach kids on weekly basis, we must invest an adequate amount of time (both in preparation and prayer) to ensure that we convey God’s truths to kids in whatever way possible.

Links to Complete Text

If you’re interested in reading the complete text of “Come Ye Children,” it can be found on at: http://www.spurgeon.org/misc/cyc.htm

The complete text of Chapter Thirteen can be found at: http://www.spurgeon.org/misc/cyc13.htm

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Chapter 14 – “Come, Ye Children”—The Psalmist’s Invitation: NEXT TIME>>

Return to the Come Ye’ Children (A Synopsis) index page.

Related posts:

1. “Come, Ye Children” – The Psalmist’s Invitation (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 14)
2. King David’s Two Encouragements to Parents and Teachers (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 15)
3. Obadiah’s Early Piety (Synopsis of Come Ye’ Children – Chapter 18)