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Ch. 10 – Embracing Biblical Methods: A Life of Communication – Shepherding A Child’s Heart (A Synopsis)

May 10, 2009 in Shepherding A Child's Heart with 0 Comments

Shepherding A Child's HeartIn this installment of our synopsis of Tedd Tripp’s book “Shepherding A Child’s Heart,” we will look at Chapter 10 – “Embracing Biblical Methods: A Life of Communication.”

Tripp begins this chapter with the following observation, “Communication not only disciplines, it also disciples.”  Tripp reminds us of the call Deuteronomy 6 to talk to our kids at all time – lying down, walking, rising, sitting.  Making communication with our children a habit during normal times makes it easier to talk to them under the strain of difficult situations.

Tripp observes that having biblical conversations with our kids is not a short process.  It is a time-consuming, all-consuming pursuit.  It requires patience, insight and flexibility.  Any parent will understand that there are times when kids want to talk and times when they don’t.  In those times when their hearts are open to talking to us, we must be prepared to drop everything to seize the moment.  We must train our kids to communicate.  This also involves training them how to listen.  The most effective way to do this is to be an active listener ourselves.  Tripp points to Proverbs 18:2 which says, “A fool takes no pleasure in understanding, but only in expressing his opinion.”  We must listen as parents before we can be in a position to talk. Continue Reading…

Ch. 9 – Embracing Biblical Methods: Types of Communication – Shepherding A Child’s Heart (A Synopsis)

May 7, 2009 in Shepherding A Child's Heart with 2 Comments

Shepherding A Child's HeartIn this installment of our synopsis of Tedd Tripp’s book “Shepherding A Child’s Heart,” we will look at Chapter 9 – “Embracing Biblical Methods: Types of Communication.”

In the last chapter, Tedd Tripp addressed the need for rich, full communication with our kids.  In this chapter he looks at different types of communication.  He notes that as parents we often reduce our role to three things: rules, correction, and punishment and notes that most parents would admit that 80-90% of their communication falls into one of those three areas.  While he admits that rules, correction and punishment are necessary in every family, there are other types of communication, and we do our kids great harm when we can’t discern the appropriate type of communication for the moment.

He offers descriptions of the following eight types of communication (he does note that these are selected types of communication and there are more):

Continue Reading…

Ch. 8 – Embracing Biblical Methods: Communication – Shepherding A Child’s Heart (A Synopsis)

May 3, 2009 in Shepherding A Child's Heart with 3 Comments

Shepherding A Child's HeartIn this installment of our synopsis of Tedd Tripp’s book “Shepherding A Child’s Heart,” we will look at Chapter 8 – “Embracing Biblical Methods: Communication.”

In the last chapter, Tripp addressed a number of unbiblical methods.  In this chapter, he starts into what constitutes biblical methods, but first he reminds us that methods and goals must be complimentary and that our goal as parents is to help our children realize that “a life worth living is life lived under the Lordship of Jesus Christ.”  Tripp also reminds us that as parents we must submit to the same Lord.

Tripp offers that a biblical approach to raising kids involves both 1) Rich, full communication; and 2) The rod.

He offers the following list of verses to support this contention:

  • Proverbs 23:13-19
  • Proverbs 23:22
  • Proverbs 23:26

Continue Reading…

Ch. 7 – Discarding Unbiblical Methods – Shepherding A Child’s Heart (A Synopsis)

April 30, 2009 in Shepherding A Child's Heart with 3 Comments

Shepherding A Child's HeartIn this installment of our synopsis of Tedd Tripp’s book “Shepherding A Child’s Heart,” we will look at Chapter 7 – “Discarding Unbiblical Methods.”

In this convicting chapter, Tripp moves from the goals of parenting to the methods.  He looks at several popular, but unbiblical, approaches to disciplining our kids.  He observes that as parents we cannot afford to be indifferent to methodology.  Our methods are as important to God as our goals, and biblical goals must employ biblical methods.  The following are some of the unbiblical methods prevalent in our society today.

1. I Didn’t Turn Out So Bad

In this method, a parent blindly employs those methods used by their own parents without any thought to whether or not those methods are biblical. Continue Reading…

Ch. 6: Reworking Your Goals – Shepherding A Child’s Heart (A Synopsis)

April 26, 2009 in Shepherding A Child's Heart with 3 Comments

Shepherding A Child's HeartIn this installment of our synopsis of Tedd Tripp’s book “Shepherding A Child’s Heart,” we will look at Chapter 6 – “Reworking Your Goals.”

In this chapter, Tripp calls parents to rethink their goals for their children in light of the chief end of man – that being to glorify God and enjoy him forever.  In doing so, Tripp looks at the 7 areas addressed in the last chapter.

1. Developing Special Skills

Tripp points out that there is no biblical mandate to, nor a verse that even supports the idea of, developing our children’s self-worth.  All of the activities which we busy our kids with tend to teach them to trust in themselves.  The Bible tells us that those who trust in themselves are fools!  The concepts of self-trust and self-love that are so prevalent in our culture today turn people from God.  Furthermore, the amount of time that these activities takes up tend to become the priority for families and distract from biblical goals such as time spent reading the scriptures, prayer and more.  Rather than viewing these special skills as the goal for our kids, we should remember that the real reason for developing any skills is to be a good steward of the gifts God has given us.

Continue Reading…

Ch. 5: Examining Your Goals – Shepherding A Child’s Heart (A Synopsis)

April 23, 2009 in Shepherding A Child's Heart with 3 Comments

Shepherding A Child's HeartIn this installment of our synopsis of Tedd Tripp’s book “Shepherding A Child’s Heart,” we will look at Chapter 5 – “Examining Your Goals.”

Tripp explains that every parent wants kids who are happy and successful.  We differ in our definitions of success, but whatever our definition is, that’s what we want for our kids.  Tripp proceeds to examine several unbiblical goals that many parents have for their kids:

1. Developing Special Skills

We get our kids involved in all kids of different activities so that they can learn different skills.  Parents must consider whether they measure their own success based on the number and different types of activities they provide their kids.  Do we judge our kids’ success based on the number of skills they develop?  Is little Johnny a failure if he’s good at soccer and basketball, but struggles at football?  It is important that we consider whether all the activities we get our kids involved in have biblical content.

Continue Reading…

Ch. 4: You’re In Charge – Shepherding A Child’s Heart (A Synopsis)

April 19, 2009 in Shepherding A Child's Heart with 2 Comments

Shepherding A Child's HeartIn this installment of our synopsis of Tedd Tripp’s book “Shepherding A Child’s Heart,” we will look at Chapter 4 – “You’re In Charge.”

In this chapter, we look at the basis for parental authority.  Tripp begins by explain that our culture is adverse to authority – not just being under authority, but also being an authority.  In our culture, we view all authority as derived from overwhelming force or by consent.  As Tripp explains, that leaves only 2 potential responses – either rebellion or servility.  In Tripp’s words, “Our culture has no notion of intelligent, thinking persons willingly placing themselves under authority.”

When it comes to parenting, the author explains that parents often don’t understand our biblical mandate to shepherd our children.  Accordingly, the goals of parenting often become nothing more than immediate comfort and convenience.  In order to function, parents and children must understand that God calls parents to be in charge over their children and that children are called by God to obey their parents.

Continue Reading…

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